Today a good opportunity came up for me to discuss getting WLS with my husband. I was nervous - I just really didn't know what his response would be. My guess was that he'd be against it - the surgery and spending the money. However, he surprised me! He is totally onside with it! He said that if it'll make me happy then I should do it. I think at first he thought I'd be able to get it done at no cost (I'm in Canada), which I could if I wanted to wait years - so I said, no, we'd have to pay. Again, he was fine with it. It's good to get that hurdle out of the way. Our young daughter was away all day with friends so he and I spent a wonderful day on the deck in the sunshine and chatted for hours. I told him the surgery will be difficult at times. There's no going back, etc. But that I was on the way to weight-related diseases with about 100% positivity. He said, that alone would be enough reason to have it done. Of course, my mind was slipping into a bad direction - is he embarrassed of me and would do anything to have me look better?! I said as much to him, and he said 'of course not!' It's not fair of me to think that way - I'm embarrassed of myself looking this way! Anyway - it's nice to have his support :-)

@@TracyBar - hang around here and read as much as you can. I'm hardly an expert, since I haven't been through it yet. But there are recurring themes to the "please help!" posts.

As a past ER nurse and paramedic, if the only health problem I had was the VSG, I probably wouldn't wear a bracelet, but I would put a card in my wallet with my ID that had bright red edges and said EMERGENCY MEDICAL INFORMATION and had the "no blind NG, no NSAID" info printed on it along with emergency contact info. Anatomically speaking, the blind NG won't be nearly as much of an issue with the sleeve as it would be with a bypass or lap band. And that's not something that's needed immediately in an emergency situation. It's highly unlikely anyone would be putting in a blind NG or giving NSAID's before someone had pulled your ID out. If they are, then they're doing CPR and an NG is the least of your worries. Something like a drug allergy is much more important for medical personnel to have immediately. I have to wear a bracelet for my many health problems and drug information, so I'll just have this added to the record.

Let's see... the things I've seen recurring on the board that I've made note of:

There's all the post-op "what can I eat" and "I can't keep fluids down" posts - get your doc to pre-emptively prescribe Zofran.

And then there's the advice to be deadly serious about getting your fluids and Protein in - most common reason for ER visits post-op appear to be dehydration, and protein is needed for healing.

There's the "don't take as much stuff as you think you need to the hospital" posts. Lip balm, computer/tablet/phone, and gas-X strips seem to be the only consistent advice.

There's the "don't buy cases of protein stuff beforehand, because your tastes are very likely to change". I've gotten a variety of stuff to try pre-op, and will likely keep a variety stock for after.

There's the tons of posts about constipation, and apparently some surgeons don't want you taking certain meds for it post-op, so definitely get instructions for dealing with that from your doc. The change in diet apparently does you in, plus pain meds are notorious for causing it.

There's the "I'm crying all the time and regretting this surgery" for about a week or two post-op. The vets say by and large this is due to the massive hormone dump. Fat cells store estrogen along with a bunch of other hormones, and as you lose the fat cells, these hormones dump into your system and it seems to create a PMS-type of situation for a while after.

Then there's the stalls that appear to happen periodically through the weight loss period, so we should be prepared for that.

And of course, all of the advice on how to not break the bank staying clothed as you go through sizes like crazy.

I think that's the major ones.

Ugh. Doesn't sound fun at all! I think the clothing issue may be a good thing though I'm pretty worried about my regretting stage... and as I said before, I'm still at the point where I'm finding it hard to think of actually getting this done. I was actually thinking tonight that maybe I'll just be too sad to give up on food - it's been a comfort to me for a long time! But then I realize that eventually we can eat what we want, just not a lot of it. Right?

Quick response ...

The 85% of the stomach that is removed during VSG surgery is the FUNDUS. This is the part of the stomach that stretches. The rest that is left is the non-stretchy part of the stomach. That's a good thing.

The other thing the FUNDUS does that the non-stretchy part of the stomach (your new sleeve) will NOT do is to produce ghrelin -- the hunger hormone. And believe me, you will be so grateful for the lack of / reduced level of ghrelin post-op.

Immediately after surgery, your new sleeve will feel like the surgeon removed 95% of your stomach. She/he did not. However, right after surgery your remaining non-stretchy sleeve will be traumatized, inflamed and swollen terribly, making its capacity incredibly tiny. This inflammation and swelling will go down gradually as the severed edges of your new sleeve (which are stapled together) start to heal, repair themselves and grow / knit back together.

This healing takes months. The severed nerves have to find each other and make new connections. So do the stomach muscles and other tissues. And that's why you have to be incredibly compliant and careful about what you eat during the early months post-op. This is when complications can occur caused by eating inappropriately at that time.

One of the hardest things for some patients to learn is that post-op they are NOT on *just another diet* and that eating inappropriately is not *just cheating*. This is also why vets and well educated newbies have such strong reactions to people who want to eat cheeseburgers and tortilla chips and drink alcohol and what-not a week or two or three post-op.

How long does it take for your sleeve to fully heal? I'm sure it varies from patient to patient. But in my case, I had the sense that by six months my sleeve was intact again. I know that when I and other family members have had other injuries / surgeries of various kinds that we've been told by surgeons that it takes a full year for our bodies to recover from severe injuries / surgeries. This would be a great question to ask your own surgeon.

Keep learning about the sleeve. The details about the surgery and its aftermath really do matter and your self-education will improve your compliance. And teach your husband what you learn. The more he knows, the more effective his support for you can be.

Ugh. Doesn't sound fun at all! I think the clothing issue may be a good thing though I'm pretty worried about my regretting stage... and as I said before, I'm still at the point where I'm finding it hard to think of actually getting this done. I was actually thinking tonight that maybe I'll just be too sad to give up on food - it's been a comfort to me for a long time! But then I realize that eventually we can eat what we want, just not a lot of it. Right?

Most things in life aren't fun. I just got put on BP meds. I've been teaching patients about them for years, but going through the side effects myself isn't fun. I don't want to be on these the rest of my life. I don't want to become diabetic. I want my PsA meds to have a chance to work and decrease my joint pain so I can go back to knitting and dancing and all the things I want to do. I so much want to be around to spoil my grandchildren who aren't even passing thoughts yet.

Now that I have a date, it's feeling a lot more real and I'm starting to have second thoughts. But the stuff I just listed is what's keeping me on the path. I'm not really living my life right now, and while I don't think weight loss is a magic cure (or that surgery is the magic bullet for that weight loss) I know for a fact that a lot of my obstacles to living my life how I want will at least get a lot smaller as I do.

Hang in there!!

And yes, from everything I've researched and the experience of the lovely people here, we will at some point be able to eat anything we want, just smaller amounts. And what we want can change.

Edited July 27, 201610 yr by theantichick

Quick response ...

The 85% of the stomach that is removed during VSG surgery is the FUNDUS. This is the part of the stomach that stretches. The rest that is left is the non-stretchy part of the stomach. That's a good thing.

The other thing the FUNDUS does that the non-stretchy part of the stomach (your new sleeve) will NOT do is to produce ghrelin -- the hunger hormone. And believe me, you will be so grateful for the lack of / reduced level of ghrelin post-op.

Immediately after surgery, your new sleeve will feel like the surgeon removed 95% of your stomach. She/he did not. However, right after surgery your remaining non-stretchy sleeve will be traumatized, inflamed and swollen terribly, making its capacity incredibly tiny. This inflammation and swelling will go down gradually as the severed edges of your new sleeve (which are stapled together) start to heal, repair themselves and grow / knit back together.

This healing takes months. The severed nerves have to find each other and make new connections. So do the stomach muscles and other tissues. And that's why you have to be incredibly compliant and careful about what you eat during the early months post-op. This is when complications can occur caused by eating inappropriately at that time.

One of the hardest things for some patients to learn is that post-op they are NOT on *just another diet* and that eating inappropriately is not *just cheating*. This is also why vets and well educated newbies have such strong reactions to people who want to eat cheeseburgers and tortilla chips and drink alcohol and what-not a week or two or three post-op.

How long does it take for your sleeve to fully heal? I'm sure it varies from patient to patient. But in my case, I had the sense that by six months my sleeve was intact again. I know that when I and other family members have had other injuries / surgeries of various kinds that we've been told by surgeons that it takes a full year for our bodies to recover from severe injuries / surgeries. This would be a great question to ask your own surgeon.

Keep learning about the sleeve. The details about the surgery and its aftermath really do matter and your self-education will improve your compliance. And teach your husband what you learn. The more he knows, the more effective his support for you can be.

Incredibly helpful VSGAnn. Thank you so much. I'm trying to be extremely honest with myself while I move toward this surgery. I'm facing facts - I ignored my own warnings about eating poorly for years, resulting in the need for surgery to remove the offending body part that really didn't do anything wrong at all - it was all my actions that got me here. I can blame myself and self-hate til the cows come home but I still turn my mind to neutral when it comes to driving through McDonald's every morning for my sausage mcmuffin and tea before work! I don't even TRY anymore. It's gotten to that point now. I gave up.... The surgery seems radical, that's being honest. I worry more about afterward than the surgery itself - honesty again. And that's because there is NO turning back. Permanent decision - elective surgery to remove most of my stomach because I have NO control when it comes to the basics of life - eating. But I also have a long history of weight gain - right back to when I was 9 years old and knowing I was putting on weight - and how?? We didn't have fast food places anywhere around then - in fact, when a KFC came to town I distinctly remember holding the bucket on my lap for the drive home and breathing in the delicious smell - but I can't remember a time after that we had it. A&W - my big brother would drive to it and bring home a root beer for us little kids. But really, other than homemade Cookies we didn't get a lot junk in our house. And my parents and 3 siblings are slender and fit, just I had the weight issue. So I'm pretty sure there's a genetic thing going on too. Although I eat bad things at times, I very, very rarely overeat. It's hard not to beat yourself up for doing this to yourself, but I'm sympathetic to myself and all who struggle with their weight. It's not ONLY a self-control issue. I'm trying very hard to focus on what I will feel like 6 months or 1 year after the surgery, once I'm over the worst of the healing process. It's the spectre of regret that is killing me. And now - the spectre of the hormone dump! LOL If you can, speak about regrets - how did it affect you, or were you able to just get through the day unscathed as you moved toward being 'normal' again?

Ugh. Doesn't sound fun at all! I think the clothing issue may be a good thing though I'm pretty worried about my regretting stage... and as I said before, I'm still at the point where I'm finding it hard to think of actually getting this done. I was actually thinking tonight that maybe I'll just be too sad to give up on food - it's been a comfort to me for a long time! But then I realize that eventually we can eat what we want, just not a lot of it. Right?

Most things in life aren't fun. I just got put on BP meds. I've been teaching patients about them for years, but going through the side effects myself isn't fun. I don't want to be on these the rest of my life. I don't want to become diabetic. I want my PsA meds to have a chance to work and decrease my joint pain so I can go back to knitting and dancing and all the things I want to do. I so much want to be around to spoil my grandchildren who aren't even passing thoughts yet.

Now that I have a date, it's feeling a lot more real and I'm starting to have second thoughts. But the stuff I just listed is what's keeping me on the path. I'm not really living my life right now, and while I don't think weight loss is a magic cure (or that surgery is the magic bullet for that weight loss) I know for a fact that a lot of my obstacles to living my life how I want will at least get a lot smaller as I do.

Hang in there!!

And yes, from everything I've researched and the experience of the lovely people here, we will at some point be able to eat anything we want, just smaller amounts. And what we want can change.

Like you I'm focusing on the things I want to do that I can't do now. Right from simple things like crossing my legs (lol!) to being able to maybe ski again, or swim with my child (something I wouldn't ever do is get into a bathing suit and so ridiculous now! When I felt that way I was at a weight that I want to be at now!). But I don't want to get sicknesses directly related to being overweight/obese. I CAN do something about it and losing weight is the answer. BUT I have come to the realization that dieting AGAIN is not the answer. It doesn't work for me - I dieted my way to this weight and I have many years and many diets behind me to prove that, yes, I could lose the weight through yet another round of food deprivation and gruelling exercise - but I also know that all that hard work will end up with me at an even higher weight than when I started that diet. So sick of that loop.... What's your surgery date?

Aug 17

sent from mobile device

Incredibly helpful VSGAnn. Thank you so much. I'm trying to be extremely honest with myself while I move toward this surgery. I'm facing facts - I ignored my own warnings about eating poorly for years, resulting in the need for surgery to remove the offending body part that really didn't do anything wrong at all - it was all my actions that got me here. I can blame myself and self-hate til the cows come home but I still turn my mind to neutral when it comes to driving through McDonald's every morning for my sausage mcmuffin and tea before work! I don't even TRY anymore. It's gotten to that point now. I gave up.... The surgery seems radical, that's being honest. I worry more about afterward than the surgery itself - honesty again. And that's because there is NO turning back. Permanent decision - elective surgery to remove most of my stomach because I have NO control when it comes to the basics of life - eating. But I also have a long history of weight gain - right back to when I was 9 years old and knowing I was putting on weight - and how?? We didn't have fast food places anywhere around then - in fact, when a KFC came to town I distinctly remember holding the bucket on my lap for the drive home and breathing in the delicious smell - but I can't remember a time after that we had it. A&W - my big brother would drive to it and bring home a root beer for us little kids. But really, other than homemade Cookies we didn't get a lot junk in our house. And my parents and 3 siblings are slender and fit, just I had the weight issue. So I'm pretty sure there's a genetic thing going on too. Although I eat bad things at times, I very, very rarely overeat. It's hard not to beat yourself up for doing this to yourself, but I'm sympathetic to myself and all who struggle with their weight. It's not ONLY a self-control issue. I'm trying very hard to focus on what I will feel like 6 months or 1 year after the surgery, once I'm over the worst of the healing process. It's the spectre of regret that is killing me. And now - the spectre of the hormone dump! LOL If you can, speak about regrets - how did it affect you, or were you able to just get through the day unscathed as you moved toward being 'normal' again?

You're welcome, @@TracyBar .

Re the immediately post-op hormone dump that many women experience -- I had it very easy because I'm quite post-menopausal. I had sleeve surgery at age 68.

And after menopause I used hormone replacement only for a year or so before discontinuing them all. Therefore, my body fat wasn't full of a lot of hormones that flooded my system during the early weight loss periods post-op.

Yes, I had a few strange days. But honestly, I was so distracted by the other WLS stuff happening to me at that time -- comparatively rapid weight loss, changing body image, getting used to all the new post-op regimens (eating, tracking, exercising, etc.) that we all go through post-op. Hubby and I also had a lot of distracting things going on in our lives which were distracting.

I do know that if the post-op hormonal dump happens to you, it won't continue forever.

There are a lot of things that happen to us post-op that change considerably over time. As I wrote on another thread this morning, you can be pretty sure that how you feel today is not how you're going to feel in a few weeks, months or years.

Incredibly helpful VSGAnn. Thank you so much. I'm trying to be extremely honest with myself while I move toward this surgery. I'm facing facts - I ignored my own warnings about eating poorly for years, resulting in the need for surgery to remove the offending body part that really didn't do anything wrong at all - it was all my actions that got me here. I can blame myself and self-hate til the cows come home but I still turn my mind to neutral when it comes to driving through McDonald's every morning for my sausage mcmuffin and tea before work! I don't even TRY anymore. It's gotten to that point now. I gave up.... The surgery seems radical, that's being honest. I worry more about afterward than the surgery itself - honesty again. And that's because there is NO turning back. Permanent decision - elective surgery to remove most of my stomach because I have NO control when it comes to the basics of life - eating. But I also have a long history of weight gain - right back to when I was 9 years old and knowing I was putting on weight - and how?? We didn't have fast food places anywhere around then - in fact, when a KFC came to town I distinctly remember holding the bucket on my lap for the drive home and breathing in the delicious smell - but I can't remember a time after that we had it. A&W - my big brother would drive to it and bring home a root beer for us little kids. But really, other than homemade Cookies we didn't get a lot junk in our house. And my parents and 3 siblings are slender and fit, just I had the weight issue. So I'm pretty sure there's a genetic thing going on too. Although I eat bad things at times, I very, very rarely overeat. It's hard not to beat yourself up for doing this to yourself, but I'm sympathetic to myself and all who struggle with their weight. It's not ONLY a self-control issue. I'm trying very hard to focus on what I will feel like 6 months or 1 year after the surgery, once I'm over the worst of the healing process. It's the spectre of regret that is killing me. And now - the spectre of the hormone dump! LOL If you can, speak about regrets - how did it affect you, or were you able to just get through the day unscathed as you moved toward being 'normal' again?

You're welcome, @@TracyBar .

Re the immediately post-op hormone dump that many women experience -- I had it very easy because I'm quite post-menopausal. I had sleeve surgery at age 68.

And after menopause I used hormone replacement only for a year or so before discontinuing them all. Therefore, my body fat wasn't full of a lot of hormones that flooded my system during the early weight loss periods post-op.

Yes, I had a few strange days. But honestly, I was so distracted by the other WLS stuff happening to me at that time -- comparatively rapid weight loss, changing body image, getting used to all the new post-op regimens (eating, tracking, exercising, etc.) that we all go through post-op. Hubby and I also had a lot of distracting things going on in our lives which were distracting.

I do know that if the post-op hormonal dump happens to you, it won't continue forever.

There are a lot of things that happen to us post-op that change considerably over time. As I wrote on another thread this morning, you can be pretty sure that how you feel today is not how you're going to feel in a few weeks, months or years.

Thanks! I'm 54 and in menopause for about a year and a bit now. My doc said that it may not be to traumatic for me as fat holds a lot of estrogen. I certainly did experience some mood swings (my family can attest to that!) and some hot flashes at times, but nothing like what I know other women have had. But of course, it doesn't just end does it? I mean you can experience all these symptoms of menopause always - perhaps it depends on the woman. I do worry a bit about the hormone dump since I didn't suffer too much with menopause. It also keeps me looking younger! So I will miss that for sure :-( But the ultimate reason is health and my weight (ESPECIALLY since menopause) has been creeping steadily upward. Thanks for you input!