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Fell off the wagon, and it ran me over...



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I appreciate the question. For the first time in my fat-since-age-12 life, after losing and regaining about two tons of weight, I had a gall bladder attack (I think), and I am stupefied. Eight months out, still haven't hit the "sweet spot," and my doctor keeps canceling clinic dates to where I have to go 2 - 3 months between fills. I am trying so hard and the scale is doing NOTHING. I'm almost to the point of feeling like the failure I always felt I was in the past. I know that I'm supposed to be upbeat and oh, so cheery, but I'm having a tough time emotionally. AND, the local support groups are mostly by-pass patients. Not the same. Sorry to be so negative, and I really appreciate your asking.

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hi bionic, i know what you mean...i hate lectures altho' i do find on this site people are pretty supportive.

i started to adopt my "old eating habits" and i must tell you it scared the be-jesus out of me. and i couldnt stop.

so i decided to start journalling what i was eating on sparkpeople.com . i forced myself to be totally honest with myself since i was the only one looking at this. i also pushed to try to get to the gym. at first i didnt feel like doing any of this...but eventually it clicked...

good luck...and only 1 foot has to go in front of the other. that helps me sometimes too

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i just read your last post about your doctor cancelling appts. thats not good. is there anyway to look for a new doctor that will pick up someone who had the surgery done elsewhere.

your doctor's cancellations sound like part of the problem. having the right fill definitely helps to get rid of the hunger pangs....

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i'm sorry you are having such a difficult time ... :blush:

it doesnt make it any easier with an uncooperative surgeon.

keep trying different things. if one thing doesnt work, tweak it a little bit. how is your activity level? are you consuming too many (or too little?) cals?

you can do this. come here for questions / suggestions / support ...

YOU CAN DO THIS!

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thebionicbroad~just wanted to check in and see how you are doing????

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lecture smecture!!!!!!!!!! take one day at a time........ heck take one glass of Water at a time......

Make it your goal to get your water in one day.... then go for two... you will start feeling better and then start making better choices throughout the day...

for me I am a CARBOHOLIC.......... I know it, it ain't pretty, but its true..... even now I can be caught taking a bite of chewy garlic bread and then spitting it out before swallowing because I KNOW I will be pb'ing it up if I do......... first step is admitting it ;)

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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