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Discrimination Against People Who Had WLS



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Just had my first experience with a large woman who told me I wasn't choosing a healthy lifestyle because I had weight loss surgery and that I would regret it when all my hair falls out and after I have to be in and out of the hospital for malnutrition. Wow. I normally hear the standard "the easy way out" bit but this was different.

I think this woman was part of the fat acceptance movement.

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She could also be terminally clueless. Also tactless. Fortunately, you don't need her approval!

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You are almost a year into this - interesting that she could look right at you and say those things....

However, I do think we get a little cocky too. I have learned that in some ways, WLS patients are a bit more vulernable to certain health issues. Or, as a plastic surgeon once said to me "not always as healthy as they look". i use that as motivation to keep up with my much hated Vitamins, hit my Protein targets and stay active because I DONT want to be one of those that faces degraded health 10 years from now.

I am still really wanting to see a large scale study of life ecpectancy of WLS vs not; comparing people who say are obese iin their 40s.... and statistically what happens. I peronally know a few super obese people who have literally dropped dead many years before their time. I can't say I know any successful WLS patients with that same story.

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sounds like she was just telling you all the things she tells herself to justify her not getting the surgery. classic projection. pay her no mind or as was previously said on this thread - just smile and say "bless your heart"

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I'd rather be balding and malnourished than have high cholesterol, high blood pressure, sleep apnea, and diabetes.

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I totally agree with you on that point. If her idea of being unhealthy means I do not have to take medications to stay healthy and alive I`ll take that.

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I think people are just uninformed...in this case rude as well. I can understand that people find the idea of cutting our stomach out to be extreme, however if it improves our health is it really so bad? A guy I knew who was in his 40's suffered from major diabetes and morbid obesity. Last year he ended up septic because of an infection and it destroyed his liver (i think either that or a kidney). Either way, before he could be cleared for a transplant, he had to have heart repair surgery, and last month he died in the OR. I sincerely doubt that if he had had bariatric surgery when he was younger and had been able to maintain a healthy weight that he would have died the way he did. I don't know if I will be healthier in the future, but I know I am healthier now. Also, plenty of people have had their stomach removed due to cancer and their life expectancy from nutrition related issues is not different than a "normal" person. That information contributed to my decision to have surgery.

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You should have told her to "f off", you didn't have gastric bypass, malnutrition isn't a real worry.

I have a friend that is just mystified that I don't look sickly after losing "so much weight, so fast". Well it wasn't really that fast, and I eat every day, all day. I always took Vitamins before surgery and I still take them. Even with less food than most people I still get more nutrients than most people.

People still think weight loss surgery is like it was 10-15 years ago. It is so different now, because of technology and information being readily available. Also online ordering supplies. Think of all the people that come here that had little nutritional guidance from their program, but people are able to help them. In the past those people would have just struggled alone.

Like @@AvaFern said the reason I chose this surgery was because there is over 100 years of data that you can live with little to no stomach and be perfectly normal. Once your intestines get messed up, it is just a long slow death.

I'm not the type to say that people are jealous because I think that is a lazy response to usually complicated situations, but I think there is some jealous in WLS. There are a lot of people who desperately want surgery, and can't afford it/their insurance doesn't cover it, it is not available for them. Some of the posts I see here people who want to be approved changed my opinion on how bad people want surgery and how hard some people have to work to make it happen. I think there are some fat people that worry, they will be left in a super minority, as surgery becomes more mainstream, available and socially acceptable. They are being crowded out. Most minority groups go through these kinds of growing pains, but since access to medical care, has so many socio-economic factors, and how you look affects your earning potential and other social aspects, this is just a huge powder keg, we haven't even got to the real tipping point yet, wait 5 more years.

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Did she make that comment before or after you told her to mind her damn business?

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@@Proud2BMe

I forgot to ask before but what was the context of this conversation? How did your WLS even come up? It sounds like this woman was a stranger.

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Did you wish her good luck with her surgical procedure to remove her cranium from her rectum?

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What she really was saying was"I wish I had the strength to let go of my food addiction and face my problems like you."

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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