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Would you date a Single Father?



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I become a single Father in 2000. My kids were rather young at the time. Well look at the math--today my boys are 9 and 11 now. I have gotten many reports from shool they are very well behaved and a few people have told me the same.

I have talked to a few Women--but each time-I get this most used saying.."Good Luck". I have not gone through my speech of me knowing how to cook, how to wask and keep house. But no chance is even given.

Some Women wven think--"OH--he can't do that himself"--"There is no way the kids are doing so well and he's the Man at the end of it--someone is helping him"..

Dates--few...Even though the Lap Band has given me a 37 pound weight loss since March 28th-2007. I get compliments--but no dates...I get flirts--no dates....Would you take a chance and date---any single father?:cry

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I not only dated him, I married him!

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I married one, too (though he was non-custodial). Any single parent that has things under control is a miracle worker, not someone to avoid!!

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Hi Lee, I have to be honest, I would never date a single father.

Single mothers, though, are quite fine with me. I up and married me one.

Being single is a strange thing. It's like walking through the desert, parched and searching for Water, but yet being surrounded by cool spring ponds and streams that you just can't see. There is absolutely no question that there are 10,000 women within driving distance of where you are right now who would love to get to know a good man. But when you are single you can't find them. The ways to meet people are not very appealing - bars, internet, matchmakers, blind dates. Yuk. Who needs any of that. The ones who are most interested in a real relationship are the least interested in things like bars and internet dating. It's just an impossible situation, especially as we get older and have all our baggage and suspicions and history and insecurities.

OK, so now I am about to announce the solution to this problem. Are you ready?? . . . .

I wish. The fact is, I have not got a clue. It's really tough being single. In my particular case I held my nose and dove into internet dating. It sucked, but I did end up meeting my wife. Life has been much better since. I'm so glad I found her.

If I can offer any advice at all, let me just say that I would put aside any thoughts that no woman would want to date a single father in general or you in particular. That is absolutedly not true. And if you feel like there is a shortage of women around, that is also absolutely not true. I know it seems like there is a shortage, but that is not true. None of those things is the problem. The problem is, how do you go about finding and meeting some of the thousands of women around you who you can't see and don't know how to find, but who would love to go out with you. I sure wish I had an answer for you.

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I also did, and also married him.

Kids actually seem to attract some women, I think. It's really wonderful to see a man who is single and a good, involved, devoted father. Women tend to see that as a positive character trait.

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The last two entries are so correct when I was in a larger city. I moved here and my lord--it seemed like I have a desease or something.

But that doesn't mean I am living in never ever land. I just may live in a place that too small and many of the ladies are different--maybe that is what it is. Don't worry--I'm not discouraged at all...things all work themselves out in time...

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Yeah, there are a lot of women out there who LIKE single dads, because it is very admirable when a guy shows he is willing to make the sacrifices needed to be a good dad.

I'm sure if you keep looking long enough you will find a woman who will appreciate you!

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I married a single dad, although his kids did not live with him until AFTER we got married. My advice to anyone marrying a non-custodial parent.....custody arrangements can change, so don't count on part-time parenting forever.

Really, anyone over the age of 35 or so who likes kids probably has one or two of his/her own, so I'm surprised it's such an issue. Unless, of course, you are looking to date younger women.

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Lee, it appears to me that you should be frequenting a singles website for all these dating posts....Not that they aren't interesting, but SHEESH! I think you have 5 or 6 active threads that are all about dating....

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I would date a single father if I was interested in him. It would be a factor in my decision, but ultimately the most important thing to me would be whether we enjoyed each others' company and if there was a connection.

Oh yeah, and if I wasn't married already. That really throws things off a little bit.

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I agree, it comes down to love. If I happened to fall in love with a single father then yes, I'd marry him.

But I'd go into it with my eyes wide open. There can be baggage and it can affect your new family. I have a couple of friends who married into that sort of situation and are happily married, very much in love but rather heartbroken about not being free to have as many babies as they wanted because there husbands are still supporting other families and cannot afford to provide for five or six children. Their husbands of course are honourable men who have done the right thing by ex wives. I've got another friend who's having all sorts of heartache with her husband's uncontrollable 15 year old son, who refuses to treat her or their home with any respect.

Its not always an easy road.

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As a happily married man I would have to say absolutely not, I know if I started dating any man, no matter haw many children he had, would really piss my wife off

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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