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Developed a replacement habit to food



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Hi everyone. Damn I'm in tears writing this I'm only nearly 2 months out but I've already developed a bad new replacement habit and feeling really crappy about and at myself.

I've started over spending and shopping. Nothing crazy expensive but it's all been adding up to so much I'm not going to make a bunch of big bill payments. I know if I reign in now I can be caught up by Christmas but still I'm so mad at myself.

I wasn't like thus pre surgery. But I've been getting such a buzz and a major high from buying stuff. Things like stuff for our camp trip and Christmas gifts,a few new pants, a pair of curtains etc. Might not sound lavish but it's all added up to possiblly $1-2k in the last month over budget.

Ugh now bill time has come and I'm freaking out and will have to make some calls. I don't know why I've been doing it I knew it would lead to this. It's just like the food all over again :/

I don't have a therapist and I certainly couldn't afford one until I catch up with the bills. Please can anyone who's been through this and stopped give me any advise? Thank you in advance.... a guilt ridden sleever.

Edited by MsTwist

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It's somewhat understandable

You're going to have to buy new clothes for your new body. I can she where folks can go overboard

I'm hoping the gym becomes my obsession

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I don't have a solution. I have done the same. I think it gives us something to do other than eat - especially if you have a trip planned. The only suggestion I have as far as stopping is maybe what my therapist tells me about food - make a list of things now of all the other items you need to do to get ready for your trip or get your house ready or just random chores you have been meaning to do, then when you have the urge to eat when you are not hungry (or shop), get out that list and work on one of those items until you can cross it off the list. Once you have crossed it off, you will feel accomplished and hopefully the urges will have passed.

Hope that helps!

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I picked up my old hobbies . Find something you enjoy using your hands and finishing your project. I seek many of my projects , which puts more money in my pocket. Don't be hard on yourself.... This is new to all of us and we will mess up from time to time. Good luck!!!!

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I'm sorry. How frustrating. I don't have this issue. Maybe when this urge arises, tell yourself you can't buy clothes yet cause you're going to still get smaller and it's a waste of money at this point? What about exercising when these urges arise? No it's not going to be the same, but maybe doing something with your time that gets your mind off of it will help?

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I think it's difficult for those of us who have addictive personalities. Now that being addicted to food is no longer a possibility, what do we do?

I try to keep myself busy - this forum, walking, meal planning, reading about gastric sleeves - I have quite possibly made my own health my newest obsession. I also started playing a geocaching game that is taking up some time that I'm having fun with.

A therapist is a great idea but I understand the monetary implications. Mine is working with me on the payment because I can't really afford it, and I'm only seeing her every two weeks. She is big on making lists as someone mentioned in a reply before this. I do find it helpful.

Keep us posted on how you're doing and don't be afraid to ask for support - it's why we're all here!

CJ

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I took up sewing. I found I could make myself new clothes at a fraction of the cost and it keeps me busy. So far I've made three dresses, two skirts and an outfit for a little niece. It's been fun.

The one thing to be careful of is the costs involved here too. I shop for fabric at little discount stores, and have a budget for each project (I made two wraparound skirts for less than $5.00 each but invested more in some party dresses).

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I picked up my old hobbies . Find something you enjoy using your hands and finishing your project. I seek many of my projects , which puts more money in my pocket. Don't be hard on yourself.... This is new to all of us and we will mess up from time to time. Good luck!!!!

Can you share any tips on projects that can be sold? Where do you sell them at? It would be great to find something to keep me busy that also earns a little extra money.

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@@PayItForward Etsy is the most common place I've seen for selling crafted items. Also, I just heard that Amazon is staring a new "Handmade" store that will allow people to sell crafted items to compete with Etsy, though I don't know how you sign up to sell stuff on there yet.

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@@CJ Porter unfortunately being addicted to food still is very much a possibility...you just can't feed the addiction the same way as before. My food addiction has gone NOWHERE with the surgery, but I have lost weight because of the built in limitations on consumption.

To answer the OP's concern...yes, people need to find replacement addictions to fulfill the one that won't be completely fulfilled...some people will choose consumption of some sort, I've chosen exercise. It's almost too good to be true, but it does work, and while it is easy to say that it was possible to make this replacement before surgery, the fact is that for the vast majority of us it really wasn't. That is the real gift of the surgery...freedom to rewire.

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BTW, I have not had much success at all with actually coming to dislike any foods. I had a diet disaster long weekend, and I would be absolutely nowhere if I could eat anything close to what I could before. Eventually there will come a point at which I actually have to part with certain things or accept that weight loss has ended. I can tolerate red meat a lot more than I would like to be tolerate it, and on certain days it's my entire diet. So, the takeaway should be that new replacement addictions can also be other foods that you can still tolerate but didn't emphasize before instead of ones that are now virtually impossible to get former quantities of.

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Hey, I hear ya. I've developed quite a shopping addiction for clothes. I mean, nothing fit and I NEEDED new clothes, but I've had problems putting on the brakes.

I did some of the suggestions above. Used the energy I put into shopping into more constructive things: meal planning and cooking (I love to cook) excersise, learning how to knit (although the yarn could get expensive!) and reading. It's all about guiding the negative toward something more positive and constructive. And if you need professional help to do that, so be it. Good luck, sister!

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I make handmade jewelry and sell at craft fairs. I do at least one craft fair a month. I make about 800.00 a fair.. Not a bad habit to get into and earn money. Google craft fairs in your area and the cost to attend the fairs are really cheap. I normally only spend about 50.00 a fair. Good luck

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I took up sewing. I found I could make myself new clothes at a fraction of the cost and it keeps me busy. So far I've made three dresses, two skirts and an outfit for a little niece. It's been fun.

The one thing to be careful of is the costs involved here too. I shop for fabric at little discount stores, and have a budget for each project (I made two wraparound skirts for less than $5.00 each but invested more in some party dresses).

I might do that too - actually... I think I am going to do that.

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I can relate to that. In a small way I have been doing the same thing. I realized a few days ago that I was spending to much time on the computer looking for things to buy! I am putting the brakes on that....but I wish I could become addicted to housework! Unfortunately I like housework about as much as I crave water.....I DON"T

Edited by MIMISAN

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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