KeepCalm

Good observations.
One thing I have been thinking about lately, especially with many of the issues that are being brought to the surface because of the US political campaign is sexual abuse.
I know a large part of my obesity is the result of me building a literal wall against unwanted attention/pain.
Even though I never experienced overt sexual abuse, the memories of bullying, ostracism, ridicule, unwanted comments, catcalls, rejection, harassment, and discrimination are very vivid. Much of it because I am female, but more so because I am a fat female.

Many diet plans tell us it's all about the calories. But is that true after weight loss surgery?
Can you really keep eating everything you love just limit the portions?
Bariatric Dietitian Elizabeth Anderson provides her take on this question in the final installment of her dangerous diet tips series.


Imagine me, 16 years old at the neighbor’s pool, feeling pretty sassy in my new one piece bathing suit with the buttons down each side.
My grandmother’s friend edges up to the side of the pool and motions me over conspiratorially.
“Elizabeth, I see you’ve lost some weight, tell me, what’s your secret?”
“It’s easy, just eat 1000 calories a day. You can eat whatever you want just don't go over 1000."
Ladies and gentlemen, why did I ever pay for a nutrition degree when I clearly had all the information at age 16????
Clearly, I jest.
1000 calories of hot dogs, English muffins, fat free cookies and pancakes does not a diet make—let alone a healthy weight loss plan.
But it’s soooo tempting to follow this advice. It’s simple, clear cut and junk food is totally fine--as long as you keep the total consumption under the specified number of calories.
Some WLS patients have taken the bait—especially after they stop losing weight.
Not surprisingly, there are some problems with this type of plan.
1. 1000 calories of potato chips isn’t nutritious but it fits the criteria.
2. If you don’t have enough protein you’ll be compromising your weight loss—regardless of calories.
3. Individual calorie needs depend on sex, age and activity level to name a few. One size does not fit all.
There’s a better way. Stop counting calories. Don’t let a number determine how much you’re going to eat today. Rely instead on your surgical tool and natural hunger.
This can be scary—flying without a net. The temptation to use total calories as a guide is real. But ignore it. You are ready for something else, something more effective and natural.
Here’s how to start:
1. Eat three bariatric-sized meals and two portioned snacks each day.
2. Sit down to eat, eliminate distractions: TV, computer, magazines or books.
3. Pay attention to the deliciousness of the food. Savor it.
4. Try to take at least 15 minutes to finish a meal, 30 is better.
5. When you are full, stop eating. Notice if there is still food on the plate. If there is, does that make you uneasy? There are a lot of members in the Clean Plate Club. Cancelling your membership IS possible, but first you have to realize you are a member.
It isn’t easy shaking old diet thinking and behaviors—the first step is realizing you are following them. With some self-compassion and support, you can find your way back to healthy and sustainable weight management.

If you don't eat animal Protein, then substitute the protein of your choice. If you are vegan or vegetarian you are should already be used to this.

LMAO.

Looking at my journey over the past decade-plus, I can see the fallout from my terrible mentality of weight loss at any cost. But, really, at what cost? At the cost of my sanity? At the cost of my self-esteem? At the cost of my health?

People say you have nothing if you don’t have your health, and as I get older, that truth can no longer be ignored.


When I had my roux-n-y gastric bypass surgery in 2005, my goal was to lose weight. Specifically, I wanted to lose 225 pounds.

At just over five feet tall and 343 pounds, I was super morbidly obese. Those are the facts, but what is also true is that my weight has been the bane of my existence for my entire life. Or, at least, since I was about three years old, when I first realized that my weight fell on the less socially “acceptable” end of the spectrum.

So, yes, weight loss was the goal I set for myself, but what I see now is that all I really wanted was to slip into the spectrum of acceptability enjoyed by women who wear single digit jeans. It was about fitting in. It was about not standing out. It was about being “normal.”

At no point was it ever really about being healthy.

In the two years after my surgery, I dedicated my days to working out and eating as little as possible. Ultimately, I lost 201 pounds. It wasn’t the hoped for 225, but I was a size eight - victory, right?

Not exactly. Even at a size eight, I struggled with body acceptance. I still felt like a fish out of water and worse, I couldn’t seem to sync up with the woman in the mirror. I had a new body, but I didn’t feel like “me” anymore.

And worse still, I didn’t feel healthy. Sure, I’d lost 200 pounds. By all the usual measures (and certainly by societal expectations), I was “cured,” but I felt sick. My energy was low, my sleep was all over the place, and I was incredibly frustrated by a diet that seemed barely sustainable for any length of time.

That diet piece was my fault, of course. So determined to lose the weight, I worked hard to hit my daily protein goal, even if that meant I consumed hard boiled eggs three times a day and literally nothing else. For much of the past 11 years since my surgery, I’ve been riding a roller coaster. I’ve lost and gained weight over and over, the pendulum swinging back and forth and my emotions following. I have suffered serious vitamin deficiencies and still struggle to disconnect guilt from the simple act of eating. In this state of mind, it’s been easy for me to sacrifice overall well being for short-term gain, or in my case, loss.

Despite the fact that I didn’t really feel that great, it still took a while to realize why. When weight loss was the goal, I needed only to focus on the aspects of my new life that supported it: protein, calorie counting, and obsessive exercise.

Health has been the missing piece all along.

Focusing on my health has required a total turnabout. It means that I’ve had to reevaluate my goals. I’d lived so much of my life with oversimplified ideals: thin equals good, fat equals bad. The reality is more complex, as it so often is.

Looking at my journey over the past decade-plus, I can see the fallout from my terrible mentality of weight loss at any cost. But, at what cost really? At the cost of my sanity? At the cost of my self-esteem? At the cost of my health?

People say you have nothing if you don’t have your health, and as I get older, that truth can no longer be ignored.

Today, I am 89 pounds heavier than my lowest post-op weight. Typing those words makes the old me cringe… I feel waves of embarrassment, shame, anger, frustration, and the ever useless guilt.

The new part of me, the one I am working to healthfully feed mind, body, and soul, feels hope. I feel hope because I remember the young woman that weighed 138 pounds, and I know that I was less healthy standing on that scale back then than I am today in my double digit jeans. This new woman I see in the mirror still wants to lose weight, but as a byproduct of a healthy life.

Health has become my personal mission. I wasted a lot of time hating myself to obesity and then hating myself thin. My plan now is to love myself healthy. To do all that I do in the pursuit of weight loss and health with kindness to the woman in the mirror, no matter how she looks.

If any of what I’ve written resonates, I hope you too can break free. My wish for you is that as you walk your own path, you keep your eyes trained on your health goals and not simply on the scale.

After surgery I will continue my usage as well it's a self medication and I'm not seeing any harm in MJ it's not the same as tabacco and alcohol and it is true that not everyone gets the munchies and for those who do get the munchies it's because you smoke before you eat....you have to eat before you smoke so your tummy can be already satisfied all you should need is a tall cold glass of Water but everybody is different so just do what works for you
Sent from my SM-G900T using the BariatricPal App

For someone trying to lose a substantial amount of weight, the idea of building muscle may sound counterproductive. You may fear that it will make you larger and bulkier. Don’t worry: Muscle is a very dense fiber that actually takes up far less space than fat!


Let’s start by defining what is meant by “strength training”. This term loosely refers to the use of resistance -- in the form of machines, free weights, bands, or even one’s own bodyweight -- to increase the strength and size of muscles. (We’ll get into more specifics later.)
For someone trying to lose a substantial amount of weight, the idea of building muscle may sound counterproductive. You may fear that it will make you larger and bulkier. Don’t worry: Muscle is a very dense fiber that actually takes up far less space than fat!
In fact, you should worry more about losing muscle. Muscle is increasingly hard to develop as we age, yet it’s incredibly important to maintain for a variety of reasons.
Sarcopenia -- essentially the wasting of muscle -- is a condition that contributes to a significant number of health problems. In his 2006 study, “The underappreciated role of muscle in health and disease”, Robert R. Wolfe found that: “Both cardiac failure and cancer are often associated with rapid and extensive loss of muscle mass, strength, and metabolic function (cachexia)” (American Society for Clinical Nutrition, 2006). The fact that muscle plays a tremendous role in metabolic function explains its significant impact on overall health.
In addition to burning significantly more calories per day than fat tissue, muscle tissue also helps to stabilize blood sugar and hormones. A study conducted by researchers in the Life Sciences Institute at the University of Michigan found that white muscle, the type formed through resistance training, utilized glycogen and controlled blood glucose more efficiently than red muscle, the muscle associated with cardiovascular training (Williams, 2013).
This is not to say that cardiovascular exercise is not important, only that strength training is also highly beneficial. In addition to building new muscle, resistance training can prevent the catabolization (breakdown) of the muscle you already have.
According to the National Council on Strength & Fitness, “Losses of lean mass during the ‘dieting’ process reduce the caloric contribution of muscle and just 10 kcals/day equates to the metabolic equivalent of one pound of fat in a year” (“A Pound of Muscle Burns 30-50 Kcal/Day, Really…”, n.d.). Therefore, in order to properly recover from training and preserve muscle, you may need to increase your protein intake. Speak with your nutritionist about how much you need!
Not only does building strength affect you physically, it can also greatly benefit your mental health by boosting confidence and self-esteem. You will stand taller and feel more grounded in your own body. You will feel more powerful and competent in all areas of life. And, as a bonus,, building muscle can help improve the appearance of loose skin caused by losing large amounts of weight.
There are a few things to consider before beginning a strength training program. Most importantly, as with any workout program, always consult with your physician first. Those with high blood pressure may be discouraged from lifting particularly heavy weights until the blood pressure is controlled.
You then need to consider the safest and most efficient exercise equipment. For example, machines are rarely a “perfect fit”, and they also dictate a single pattern of movement that may not be ideal for the mechanics of your body. However, most machines are used while seated, so they might be a good option if you have difficulty standing.
Using free weights, cables, and bands allows you to move more naturally and in a space that feels more comfortable. In addition, training with these tools (as opposed to machines) will force you to use your own body to do much of the stabilization. In other words, you do more work, and, as a result, burn more calories.
When you start an exercise program, start with low weights and high repetitions (around 12-15), as performing repetitive actions many times creates the neurological pathways for new movement patterns. This initial phase of training is known as the muscular endurance stage.
As form and endurance improve, gradually lower the repetitions and increase the weight, in order to build muscular strength, or “a muscle’s capacity to exert force against resistance” (Cespedes, 2013). A repetition range of 8-12 will cause hypertrophy, the point at which you begin to see an increase in the muscle size, while six or fewer reps results in the greatest improvement in actual strength and power.
With resistance training, you will need to rest between exercise sets in order to give your muscles a chance to recover. As a beginner, stick with one exercise at a time to allow your body to acclimate and adapt to the new stressors you’re placing on it.
Once you’re ready for a little more of a challenge, you can try supersets, or circuits. These terms refer to combining two or more exercises in sequence, generally for different muscle groups, so that one muscle group gets to rest while another is working. This also keeps the calories burning! For example, a simple circuit could include bodyweight squats, seated rows, and planks.
Another way to “up the ante” on your calorie burn is to choose triple-joint or compound movements, as opposed to single-joint or isolation movements. Examples of triple-joint exercises include squats and bench presses, as opposed to single-joint leg-extensions or bicep curls. Movements that require you to move more joints engage more muscle fiber, because they use larger, more calorie-consuming muscles. So, in addition to burning more calories, these movements can increase the efficiency of your workouts and save you time.
Speaking of joints, strong muscles stabilize joints and can help you avoid injuries. However, performing an exercise in bad form can actually harm your joints. Muscle soreness is fine, but do not push through sharp pain in a joint, as pain might a red flag that you are not doing something correctly, or that your body is not ready to move in a certain way. Ask a personal trainer or physical therapist about modifications or corrective exercises. It can be tempting to want to show off, but always prioritize form over weight!
As long as you have medical clearance, try adding some resistance training to your workout regime. It can boost your weight loss and be a fun break from the monotony of cardio!
References
A Pound of Muscle Burns 30-50 Kcal/Day, Really… (n.d.) [retrieved from https://www.ncsf.org/enew/articles/articles-poundofmuscle.aspx]
Cespedes, Andrea. 2013. The Difference Between Muscular Strength & Muscular Endurance. Retrieved ___________ (http://www.livestrong.com/article/154326-the-difference-between-muscular-strength-muscular-endurance/).
Williams, Laura J. 2013. Lift weights to lower blood sugar? White muscle helps keep blood glucose levels under control. University of Michigan News. Retrieved from http://ns.umich.edu/new/releases/21363-lift-weights-to-lower-blood-sugar-white-muscle-helps-keep-blood-glucose-levels-under-control

Wolfe, Robert R. 2006. “The underappreciated role of muscle in health and disease”. American Society for Clinical Nutrition.

one thing that jumps out at me, while all of this is true and good - and that's the last one about planning ahead - because I think it comes down to good self care. making time to take care of your needs a priority.
I think one reason a lot of women anyway (men pipe up if this is also true for you!) put on weight is because they are so busy taking care of everyone else that they do not take the time for good self care. Any yet, it's a trap, and we know it even while we are doing it. You can not take good care of others by neglecting yourself.
There are a lot of things I could be doing on a Sunday afternoon besides preparing my food for the week, but it is really important to have good, appropriate, measured food ready to go so that I can stick with my program.
one of the things to learn from this WLS process, in order to be healthier coming out the other side is what does good self care look like, and how do I do this? many times therapy is needed, sometimes just a friend to talk through the process as you go along.
Good article, Alex.

I'm a Lap-Band WLS post-op. Sounds a bit like AA. Obesity is a disease, and fighting it is a life-long fight, that will never go away for me. Not only do I have a Lap-Band, but I’ve done more Lap-Band WLS procedures than anyone in the world. I started doing them in Brisbane, Australia in 1996, and still do them, every week, at NYU Langone Medical Center in New York, where I’ve worked the last 10 years. I perform all of the other bariatric operations and a lot of revision surgery, but I still love doing the Lap-Band, because it’s safe, and it works.
I’ve had my own Lap-Band for 16 years. I’ve lost 120 lbs and kept it off. I was on 12 medications for obesity-related diseases and am now on three-one BP med, aspirin, and a Statin, which is sensible for anyone my age, 59. I weigh less than I did when I was 16 and playing high school rugby.
So, what have I learned from all this? Here are a few insights and tips that I’ve accrued over the years.



13 Things To Know About Living With the Lap-Band


1. Lap-Band and Other WLS Procedures. The Lap-Band can work as well as any bariatric operation, if it’s done right, and managed properly. It is by no means a lesser operation. It does, however, need you and your surgeon to work, and keep working.
2. Follow-up With Your Surgeon. It’s a two-way street. You have had your Lap-Band placed, which is usually a gentle, safe surgery that takes about 30 minutes, as a same day procedure. After surgery, you have to come regularly to have it adjusted, and your surgeon has to listen to you. I encourage my patients to come in for an appointment once a month for about 18 months, and in that time, they will normally get seven to eight adjustments. After that, it’s usually four times a year for a couple of years, then annually, or whenever the patient needs an adjustment. We have an open door policy for adjustments. Your doctor has to listen to you.
3. Lap-Band and Hunger. The aim of the adjustment is to control hunger. If you tell me you’re more hungry, if you’re eating after dinner at night while you watch TV, if you wake up starving in the morning, then your Lap-Band is loose. You don’t need to see a dietician, you don’t need to go to the gym, and you don’t need to change your diet. You need your band tightened a little.
4. What the Lap-Band Does. Having a Lap-Band is not about restricting yourself or not eating. It’s about eating a lot less, feeling satisfied, and not being hungry after you eat. The aim of a Lap-Band adjustment is to reduce hunger, to reduce the urge to eat, and secondarily, to allow you to get full and satisfied quicker. When your Band is doing this, it’s quite tight.
5. First Law of the Lap-Band. Which brings us to the first law of living with a Lap-Band. Like Newton’s first law, it’s absolute, and it’s true...you can’t live with a tight, well-adjusted band as if you don’t have one. It will beat you every time. Every. Single. Time.
6. How to Eat With a Lap-Band. With a Lap-Band, you have to eat slower than you ever thought. It takes about 20 seconds for the esophagus to push a piece of food into the stomach. You have to eat at that rate, or food will get stuck, it will hurt, and you will have an uncontrollable reflex to vomit, to get that stuck piece of food out. I am lucky enough to be married to a great woman, Chris Ren, the Chief of Bariatric Surgery at NYU Langone Medical Center. She’s a size 6 on a bad day. She doesn't eat much. Lucky her. With my Lap-Band, I eat about the same, or a little less than Chris. If I eat quicker than her, food gets stuck. For certain. Every time. So, mostly I don’t. If I’m excited, say watching the Giants beat the Cowboys, and I forget and gulp a couple of bites of my dinner, she rolls her eyes at me. I shrug, say It’s Eli, baby, and go to the bathroom. It’s how it is, and how it always will be.
7. Eat Slower. I just don’t understand the whole I can’t eat this or that, especially about vegetables and salad. It is always, always, about eating slowly. If you work out the slow eating thing, and you keep your band adjusted, you will not regain weight.
8. Be in the Moment When Eating. The next law of living with the Lap-Band is to be in the moment. If you’re in a nice restaurant with friends, or on a date, have a cocktail and relax. Order food you know you can eat easily - Oysters, soup, risotto, steak or tuna tartare, flaky fish, salmon, veal, stews. Order Sashimi, not rolls. Try tomatoes, lentils, beets or arugula. Have thin pasta, not rigatoni or lasagna. Have the pasta a little overcooked, not al dente. Get an 8 oz filet rare, and eat half of it. Don’t eat the bread!! Push food around the plate. Focus on eating slowly. Stop when you’ve had enough. Don’t mind leaving food on the plate (or take the rest home for another meal). Tell your dinner companions, if they ask, that you’re watching what you’re eating. Don’t rush. Have a glass of wine. It will relax you, and your esophagus. Have two if everyone else is. Above all else, enjoy yourself. Make it not about the food, but the experience.
9. The Lap-Band is About Moderation. Don’t obsess about what you choose to eat. Everything in moderation, like our grandmas told us. Skinny girls eat what they want. They just don’t eat a lot of it. I eat less than my wife, but I eat what I feel like eating. Have a scoop of ice cream every now and then. Have a slice of pizza. When did a slice ever hurt anyone? It's when you eat a pint of ice cream or a whole pizza pie that it’s a problem. Let the Lap-Band help you. All it asks of you is that you eat slowly. If it’s adjusted correctly, you’ll only want a slice, not a pie.
10. How to Take a Break. There’s no harm in having a break for a week or two. If you’re going on a trip to Paris, or Tuscany, and you’ve been waiting your whole life to try all the restaurants you’ve read about, and are nervous, loosen it before you go. Relax, enjoy the moment, then come back and get retightened. But make sure you get retightened, or you will regain weight.
11. Keep Your Adjustment. Everyone who empties their Lap-Band so they can eat “healthier” regains weight. A lot of weight. As sure as the sun rises in the morning. You can eat as healthy as you want if you eat slowly.
12. Eat According to Your Band and Time of Day. The power of the Lap-Band varies by time of day. It’s because the esophagus’s ability to push food is weaker in the morning. Have a cup of coffee, a little yogurt, a soft boiled egg, slowly. It’s looser at night because the esophagus is pumping strongly. Adjust your Lap-Band to deal with the evenings, so you're not hungry after dinner, then adapt to having less in the morning. Emotions affect your Band. It’s the stress hormones affecting your esophagus. If you’re overtired, angry, sad about something or just plain frazzled, stop for a bit before you eat. Sit down, calm down, then eat your meal slowly. Put your knife and fork down between bites. Put the sandwich down between bites. Go slow. Wait until you’ve calmed down.
13. Stay Connected to Your Surgeon. The final thing I’ve learned is to stay in touch with your doctor. If you start getting hungry again, get a fill. Don’t be embarrassed that you haven’t been for a year or two. If you’re getting hungry, if you’re gaining weight, go back.
The Lap-Band works. You can’t live with a Lap-Band WLS as if you don’t have it!

I am not denying that alcohol can be a problem - it hits you much harder post WLS. At 4 years out though, I consider social drinking as one of my lifestyle balancing acts. I don't need the empty calories, very true, but I am maintaining at goal, have healthy blood work, healthy liver (had scan done due to stones so could see my liver looked good per the doctors) and as mentioned above, much prefer my few times a month happy hour with the girls or wine on a dinner date over dessert etc.
It is a balancing act and we all need to take responsibility for how we choose to "balance" and seek help when it becomes a problem... or if health, lifestyle, family, friends etc are impacted. Honestly, I am more likely to binge on ice cream so THAT is something I need to have pretty much abstince on.

Speaking only for myself, I'd prefer an occasional glass of wine to an occasional four Cookies, hands down.
I'm an adult. I'm educated and capable of educating myself about the pros and cons of alcohol intake now that I'm sleeved.
I neither want or need anything beyond education on the matter from my bariatric team. Like every bite I put in my mouth and every step I take toward improved fitness, these are my responsibilities for my life, and my lifetime. I neither want nor need draconian edicts in an attempt to scare me into adherence into what anyone thinks I "must" do, or not. It's paternalistic, patronizing, and unwelcome.

Formerly obese personal trainer Kelly Coffey talks turkey about excess skin, and what she did - and continues to do - about hers.


Dear Coffey -
I’m thinking about having weight loss surgery, but I’m not too keen on living the rest of my life with extra, loose skin. What can I do to keep that from happening?
Sincerely,
Cecelia in CA




Hey there, Cecelia -
Congratulations on taking the reigns and exploring your options. I hope you find a good, honest surgeon who can help you figure out if weight loss surgery might be a strong choice for you.
As with everything concerning our bodies, the topic of loose skin generates a whole lot of hype.
The truth is there are exactly six things you can do to minimize excess, loose skin after weight loss - whether or not you have WLS. The first three are preventative, and apply to the period before weight is lost. The last three apply to the post-weight loss period.
First, prevention.
1- Don’t wait.
Ask any aesthetician or midwife and they’ll tell you: the younger we are, the more our skin can bounce back from a stretch. If you would be more comfortable weighing less and you’re afraid of having excess skin, the younger you are when you lose weight, the better.
But don’t waste precious energy wishing you had lost weight in your early 20s. You have today, and today is where your power is. If there are choices you want to make in service to your health and happiness (whether or not they would result in weight loss) today is the day to make them.
2- Avoid the loss/gain cycle.
Imagine how a once-inflated balloon looks and feels after you let the air out. Now imagine the same balloon after 4, 6, or 10 deflations. Much like the balloon, the more times we lose weight and gain it back, the looser our skin gets.
Again, now is not the time to berate yourself for all those “successful” stints in Weight Watchers that ended with you gaining the weight back and then some - it happens to all of us, myself included. Today is the day to get yourself stronger, more sustainable tools - tools that support long-term weight loss and minimize the probability of gaining it back. These tools exist, and you can get an introduction to them in my free online workshop, Why We Sabotage Ourselves (with Food) (and What We Can Do About It).
3- Keep weight gain to a minimum.
The heavier we get, the more our skin stretches, and the less likely it is to bounce back after we lose weight.
You can’t do anything now about your weight history. Feeling badly about it or judging yourself for it will only make you want to numb out (if you’re anything like me, probably with food). If you are reading this at the heaviest weight you’ve ever been, then this is the heaviest you ever need to be. If weight loss is something you want to do for you, your skin will thank you for making caring choices toward that goal starting now.
That covers the things you can do to minimize excess skin before you lose weight. Now let’s look at what you can do once the weight is gone.
4- Build muscle.
Contrary to popular belief, strength training does not “tone” or “tighten” the skin. Skin elasticity has nothing - NOTHING - to do with exercise. But strength training gives loose skin something hot and firm to lie over - namely biceps, triceps, quads and abdominal muscles.
Lots of folks - especially women - shy away from strength-training, or think it’s better to use smaller weights and do more reps. This is a myth that keeps women from ever seeing the results they want and deserve. Assuming you’re being safe and reasonable, the heavier and harder and you train, the more muscle you build, and the better you’re likely to feel about how your skin looks.
5- Have surgery.
Even if you’re young, even if you lose weight just once, and even if you strength train like a boss, there’s still a limit to the impact we can have on excess skin after weight-loss.
Some consider having skin removal surgery.
If this is something you’re thinking about, be warned: Words like “lift,” “nip,” and “tuck” are misleading. Skin removal surgery is no joke. I know that because I had it. The surgery hurts like hell, and can put you out of commision for weeks or months. Also, the medication usually prescribed to manage the post-op pain is highly addictive. If you’ve got a compulsive / addictive relationship to food, you’re way more likely to get hooked on painkillers than someone who doesn’t struggle with the compulsive overeating.
6- Love yourself.
Loving your body isn’t going to tighten, lift, or shape your skin after you lose weight, but it can minimize the negative impact that living with loose skin might have on you otherwise.
Love is action. Love means making consistently caring choices because you deserve to be cared for, no matter what you weigh or how your body looks. If you struggle to make consistently caring choices, whether you’re pre-op, post-op, or no-op, you’re not alone, and there are practical, usable tools to help you get there.
Where will you fall on the loose skin spectrum? You can’t really know unless and until you lose weight.


I yo-yo dieted for 10+ years, maxing out at 307 pounds. I had Roux-en Y in my mid-twenties and lost over half my body weight. Eventually I started strength training and became a personal fitness trainer. Two years later, I opted to have abdominoplasty (aka a tummy tuck), because the excess skin on my stomach was beyond anything that could be mediated or improved with exercise.





The surgery hurt like a son-of-a-b***h and had me out of work for a month.
I’ve made peace with the loose skin on the rest of my body. The muscle I’ve built with regular strength training helps a lot. So has treating my body with care one choice at a time for over a decade. It’s given me self-respect and peace that make my batwings an insignificant afterthought.
Loose skin post-weight loss is inevitable for those of us who are or have been obese. But if you would be healthier or more comfortable in your body weighing less, don’t let the fear of loose skin keep you from doing what you need to do to get there.
Our bodies will never look like other people’s bodies, and that’s OK.
Our bodies tell our stories, and our stories are our strength.
All good things,
Kelly Coffey
PS: Whether or not you decide to have surgery - and even if you've already had it by the time you read this - you can use the tool that's helped me to turn my life and my health around. To learn it, click here to grab a seat in my free online workshop, "Why We Sabotage Ourselves (with Food) (and What We Can Do About It)"

Nobody should be judging anyone here. What works for one person may not work for another. I personally would rather use medical marijuana than a prescription drug any day. I've been using it for a while, and more so after my revision and couldn't put weight on even with tpn. After my reversal not too long ago, I was diagnosed with gastroparesis and I still use it. It helps me more than a few other meds they prescribed without all the side effects. The comments about people smoking in their teens and having a large appetite makes me laugh. We are not teens anymore, things will effect us differently and as I mentioned before, you need to find the strain that works for you. I find that indica works best for me. I get a relaxing body high, and not a cloudy head high with the hunger. It helps my stomach relax for the gastroparesis, and helps with some of the chronic pain. You can also use the oil/tincture without the high, but great results. They use this a lot for children, and it's amazing. Please do your research! It can work wonders for so many. I feel fortunate to live in CA where it's not a big deal. I walk in the pharmacy/dispensary and it's like walking in cvs to get a prescription. No big thing:)

I fully get why they don't want smoking (all types), snuff, snuss or tobacco. Too hard on stomach trying to heal following surgery. I still find it amazing how the stomach heals and contains all the acid following surgery. But the thread morphed into an interesting discussion. Glad to be with adults who can look at these issues and discuss their concerns in a fun and interesting way with out too much judgement.
One of my favorite quotes was from a pastor who opposed Prohibition when he said "Very little good comes from the Absolute Shall." BTW if you have not seen the Ken Burns documentary on Prohibition, worth watching especially in light of the new discussion on drug policy going on today: http://www.slate.com/articles/arts/television/2011/09/ken_burns_prohibition_reviewed_a_fascinating_series_about_the_no.html

Tried it in Denver during New Years Highly recommended ????. No carbs. No calories. And if you pick your strain correctly no munchies. Just saying...legally

"People fearing the munchies are non-smokers"
Tell that to the whole box of Captain Crunch I used to polish off when I was stoned in my 20's....

I believe you guys but I can't chime in since I'm against against anything that alters your mind, although that would make me a hypocrite since I've been on a type of runner's euphoria since my surgery, and I'm addicted to this weight training I'm doing so I guess things that are mind altering can also cause addiction........ And I've had alcohol a couple of times since surgery, mostly wine, so who am I to judge.......
Hope you know I posted this to make people smile, and realize that we are all different for a reason, how can we even judge others after what some of us have been through???? Food for thought

@@shykneehighknee This is a facinating area. @@LColandrea is right about the different strains. One of the interesting things about legalization in Colorado is now there is REAL scientific testing of pot. How much THC is in it (akin to proof on liquor) as well as other factors. Also the medical pot people did a great job on showing how different strains affect people differently. I happen to do a great deal of work in Colorado, and I'm amazed at the entrepreneurial/regulatory effect of legalization.
If you have not taken time to look at the sites dealing with pot, take a look: http://www.thecannabist.co/2014/03/09/tests-show-thc-content-marijuana-edibles-inconsistent/6421/
This is a very different era and one worth watching. It changes the discussion you have with your kids over drugs. It's not a "You can't because it's against the law." Now the discussion is "why would you want to? What do you hope to have happen?" I think it could be very productive. That's my hope. My worst nightmare is very different.

Uh ... just because someone doesn't agree with your use of marijuana doesn't mean they're "bashing" you. It generally means they wouldn't use marijuana themselves and they and you disagree on this topic.
That is all.
Welcome to the Internet.

What a bunch of wet noodles! Marijuana is technically a drug, yes...but it's a hell of a lot safer than alcohol. Have you ever seen an angry pot head? The worst that can happy with a little pot is you may hug someone a bit longer than socially acceptable, laugh a little louder at a joke or, god forbid, get a great nights sleep! OH, THE HUMANITY!
Personally, I use marijuana as a sleep aid. I've struggled with insomnia for most of my life. Melatonin no longer works for me. I've been on Ambien, Lunesta and (lately) Trazadone. I'd much rather smoke a little organic pot (my uncle grows and uses all organic fertilizers and pesticides) and sleep well than pump myself full of big pharma chemicals.
@@jadama22, I'm interested to hear what you've decided and how it impacted you.

Wow some of you could benefit from a puff or two...pissy much?!! Lol!!! Are you in a legal State? If so ask your DR. I don't smoke it but my brother is a marijuana grower in Colorado. A lot of people do/can benefit from it. I'm not sure about after WLS though. If my brother ever gets the surgery I'll let Ya know

Anyhow - I originally started readg thispost because I wanted to see how ppl that have had the surgery dealt with smoking afterwards. Basically, I'm seeing it depends on the person - so I just have to keep in mind when I do, nothing but water

No carbs, no calories. Once American women figure this out, it will be legal everywhere. Just saying. (After being in professional politics for 30+ years I have figured out that what women want eventually becomes the law of the land. Doubt me at your peril. It just takes longer than it should because males make up 90% of the legislative bodies and every married woman knows how well we listen).

'People fearing the munchies are non smokers' . That actually mAkes me laugh. I used to smoke in my teens to my early to mid twenties. After smoking I could house a tray of pizza no questions asked. I'm not saying that weed made me do it but it lowered my inhibitions to say no that's probably not good to do and made me feel so hungry I could do it. I have nothing against weed, I'm just personally over the whole thing. You do you, but you just may want to rethink how you word your phrases. Everyone is different and reacts differently, and as different people we are going to answer differently than someone else. Just take every advice as it comes .. You don't have to take the advice if you don't like it good luck with everything

@@JupiterinVirgo said ...
People fearing the munchies are non-smokers. Like anything else, it's what you make of it. Marijuana does not force you to eat, and it isn't addictive.
Oh yeah?
Marijuana does make many people eat -- and eat a LOT!
It doesn't matter whether marijuana is "addictive" or not. For some people marijuana becomes an irresistible habit that's socially reinforced quite strongly because those they associate with friends / companions who smoke it. Like social drinkers, they become social marijuana smokers. And for those in whom marijuana triggers significantly increased appetites, marijuana can be a real barrier to weight loss.
This doesn't make marijuana a bad thing in itself. But it does make the use of marijuana incompatible with weight loss -- for some people.
As is often said on this message board, your experience is your experience. It doesn't mean everyone else will have the same experience you have had.