New to dating

[sgc 538]

1 hour ago, Thejeweledsleeve said:

Hey, there are many, many fish in the sea. If one does not seem to interested, you will find another.

Here is a way to spice up your profile,

"Fun and loving guy who is on a journey to not only transform my mind but my body as well. I like to do the following:

1) List all of all your outdoor activities and things you like.

Looking for a woman that would like to travel and come along this journey with me."

That's pretty much what I have done. I don't want to go too much into activities because I've been overweight my whole adult life so I haven't done much. There are things I want to do but I don't want to come off as having experience when they call me on it.

I wish I could link my eHarmony page. I copied and pasted the bulk of it. Hopefully it comes out all right.

What I'm mostPASSIONATE ABOUT

I am passionate about enjoying life. I try to find passion in everyday things or else there would be no point in getting up each morning. I like to travel but haven't been to nearly as many places as I would like. I am always looking to start something knew. Recently I started biking. Still an amateur but at least I can ride without training wheels. Lately I have also had a passion with interior design and home improvements.

I typicallySPEND MY LEISURE TIME

Biking, Bowling,Traveling, Miniature Golf, Watching of Television, sleeping

I LIKEplaying

I ENJOY WATCHING

Baseball, Football (American)

I LIKEwatching

Animation, Comedy, Crime Drama

FAVORITE SHOWS

Family Guy, Bob's Burgers, The Simpsons, Seinfeld, Breaking Bad, Better Call Saul, Fargo, The Walking Dead

The most important thingI'M LOOKING FOR IN A PERSON

I am looking for a woman who is kind and caring and who can enjoy the little things together. Someone who is upbeat and positive and energizes me when I'm around them. Someone who will be my best friend that I can let my guard down and be myself with. I am a very trustworthy person and expect that trust in return.

MOVIES Ienjoy

Comedy, Crime Drama

FAVORITE MOVIES

Office Space, The Hangover, Goodfellas, Pulp Fiction, Fargo, Shawshank Redemption

The first thingPEOPLE NOTICE ABOUT ME

People notice that I have a calm demeanor and am easy to get along with.

The one thing I wish more people wouldNOTICE ABOUT ME

That I am Neptune, God of the Sea. I sink ships and conjure up storms.

A little moreABOUT ME

I have a laid back and easy going personality. I tend to make references to Family Guy in normal conversation that typically I only get and find amusing. I am loyal to the people who are close to me and am a dependable friend. I like the simple adventures like watching the complete series of Breaking Bad in one day, visiting the largest ball of yarn, or driving to Kentucky to see if the grass is actually blue.

3THINGS I'Mthankful for

• Family and friends
• Health
• Public sanitation department. Things would not be pleasant without them

3BESTlife skills

• Achieving personal goals
• Making friends laugh
• Handyman at home

HOW MY FRIENDSdescribe me

• Easy-Going
• Quiet
• Dependable
• Loyal

5THINGS I CAN'Tlive without

• Baked Spaghetti (Mother's)
• Detroit Tigers
• Amazon Prime
• Socks
• Google Maps

[sgc 538]

Also, what would you think of dating someone in another country? I am matched with someone right across the border and she mentioned how she has been on a weight loss journey and seems like a good fit. How would you propose I ask a question about her weight loss and should I indicate that I have lost weight in said question?

[Sleeve1stFitNext 924]

1 hour ago, sgc said:

That's pretty much what I have done. I don't want to go too much into activities because I've been overweight my whole adult life so I haven't done much. There are things I want to do but I don't want to come off as having experience when they call me on it.

I wish I could link my eHarmony page. I copied and pasted the bulk of it. Hopefully it comes out all right.

This is an awesome profile. You don't need to change anything.

[sgc 538]

I still don't know how to send my own message that is more than hey how are you? Not sure how to open and grab their attention.

[Sleeve1stFitNext 924]

1 hour ago, sgc said:

I still don't know how to send my own message that is more than hey how are you? Not sure how to open and grab their attention.

You can send a message saying:

"Hey,

my name is (name). I am interested in getting to know you better and what your interest are"

[sgc 538]

eHarmony gives you questions to send but has an option to write your own message. I decided to use the write your own message. This woman said in her profile she lost 62 pounds and has a passion for fitness. I decided to write to her and congratulate her on her weight loss and tell her I lost weight too. She also mentioned she is starting boxing and jiu-jitsu. I asked her questions about that. I'm hoping it shows I read her profile, can relate to her, and have a genuine interest. We'll see how it works. She lives in Canada but says she's willing to date across the border. I may just start reaching out to more women from Canada.

[BayougirlMrsS 3,938]

SGC..... this is the way i look at things.... What's the worse someone can say.... NO..... Ok, then move on. But you have to put yourself out there. No one will come banging on your door. People will click with who they will.... not everyone is for you... or for me... or anyone else.

my advice, hang out at place that you enjoy. If she's there, she must enjoy it too.... and there's your opener. Take a deep breath and just jump in with a Hello... i'm ????. Can i offer you something to drink? If she say no... just shake her hand and say... Well you have a wonderful evening..... NEXT. Or join a singles group some place.... look around in your area and see what kinds of groups are out there. I'm not one that only looks at what a person looks like.... i look at there since of presence.... if that makes since.... i love a confident man.... NOT COCKY....

Wear something nice.... like a good pair of jeans that fit you.... noting too baggy... prefer dark color... Nice button down shirt, no flowers or crazy patterns....with a coordinating tee under it. Nice shoes... nothing old or raggy. I always look at a mans shoes... it say a lot about him. Fix your hair and wear some cologne..... but don't bath in it. if you like jewelry, one chain, watch... that's it.

Then sit your self down and scan the room. Try to avoid large groups of woman... there is always some bi*ch in the group that sets the tone for the rest.... if you like someone in the group... wait till she is alone are almost alone. or wait till you see her drink is almost empty... Then send her one over... or if you are feeling it... send the group a round... it shows you are not cheap. But make sure the waitress knows the most important one is singled out..... Say, i want to buy a round for that group... but you see the pretty one in Red.. tell her my name is ???? Then when she delivers the drink... make good eye contact... don't look down.... and smile.

Good luck

[Sleeve1stFitNext 924]

On 3/20/2017 at 9:51 PM, sgc said:

eHarmony gives you questions to send but has an option to write your own message. I decided to use the write your own message. This woman said in her profile she lost 62 pounds and has a passion for fitness. I decided to write to her and congratulate her on her weight loss and tell her I lost weight too. She also mentioned she is starting boxing and jiu-jitsu. I asked her questions about that. I'm hoping it shows I read her profile, can relate to her, and have a genuine interest. We'll see how it works. She lives in Canada but says she's willing to date across the border. I may just start reaching out to more women from Canada.

Long distance relationships are difficult, however they can work out. As long as you will be able to see each other then it should work out. I say go for it and see what happens.

[sgc 538]

I sent the message and got no response. It's not long distance really since I live only 15-20 minutes from the border. It would be the hassle of crossing every time we wanted to meet but I do know people who do it daily.

I've really liked the matches I have gotten on eHarmony. I sent out about 16 messages in two days and got nothing. It's hard to tell on eHarmony if they are still active. eHarmony also gives you questions to send. Women probably get a lot of messages so there is no real way to stand out. I tried OKCupid last night. Sent one message. I'll see if I get a response.

[Sleeve1stFitNext 924]

Women do get a lot of messages. Even at my heaviest, I was surround by emails after emails and I would read them. The difference is, I liked the guy that stood out. A lot of them were the unoriginal, " Hey Beautiful, I would like to get to know you better." or the infamous "Hey" , "Hi", "Wassup", "Can I have your number?" "Send Nudes" Now first things first, I am not beautiful, I do not like being called beautiful for the physical. I am Adorable. I have a beautiful personality but any guy that says hello beautiful, I am like nope....PLAYER ALERT!!!

My current bf sent the message (I copied it), "Hello, my name is j. I am really interested in your profile. I am sure a lot of guys talk about how you look but I want to talk about how you think. Now you "claim" to love greek mythology and that is also my favorite, so I want to ask you a few questions:" He then asked me a bunch of riddles that went from obvious to having to think really hard.

It is always the person you will lease expect to capture your attention. Only because he worked out and a lot of pictures were him at the gym and showing off his muscles. I was like look at this lunk pretending to be intellectual. Oh boy was I wrong.

Sorry if I made this about me. I just wanted to you to see that opening up to people even ones you think may not be interested, can be a great surprise.

Edited March 23, 2017 by Thejeweledsleeve

[sgc 538]

I tried to incorporate what was in her profile in my message. eHarmony is different where you don't create your own message but choose from the questions they provide. I guess the goal there is just quantity and hope someone bites.

[sgc 538]

So I made a faux pas. I was using the mobile version of OKCupid looking at matches and accidentally swiped the wrong way and indicated I liked the woman. Problem is, I don't and she frightens me. She likes me back and sent me a message. I'm not sure what to do. Out of about two dozens emails I have sent so far, she is the only one that responds to anything from me.

[Sleeve1stFitNext 924]

@sgc LOL I am soo sorry. Why don't you like her? What is wrong with her ? Does she have the crazy girl look in her eye. You know the one that looks like she would sit in the bushes outside of your house or sneak in while your out and wear your clothes?

Also, you never know she may be the one.

[sgc 538]

From the pics she has a goth thing going on it looks like. She doesn't look like she is a pleasant person. This is a part of her profile. She doesn't come off as the sweet, gentle, nurturing type I'm looking for.

Pretty sure my mother named me Jessica not Jess or Jessy. Get it right.
25.
15 tattoos.
Mouth like a sailor.
I'm a phlebotomist.
I'm from Utah, no I'm not Mormon.
I like to have fun and joke around.
Starcastic as fuck.
People say I'm an asshole, but I have the biggest heart.
Pop punk is life.
I know what I want, do you?
Not on here to play games, if you don't like me after we talk for a while or just aren't that into me, fucking tell me

I feel like responding and calling her Jess and that may end things. She also lives in the same city as me, and judging by one of her pics, I may know the street she lives on.

[sgc 538]

I've sent about 35 messages the past week and nothing so far. I'm trying to make each message unique and not seem like I'm copying and pasting. I know women have to get 100's of messages so I'm not sure if mine are standing out. I'm going to post a couple examples.

This woman talked about how she has traveled and lived in New Zealand for a year. She also mentioned how she wanted to travel to Italy which I want to as well and am not bullshitting. She also mentioned her name in her profile so I decided to address her by name. She also ended the profile by saying if you like what you hear, than message her.

Hello xxxxx, my name is Shaun and I read your profile and I did like what I heard. (Could be because I read it in a Peter Griffin voice) I see you want to go to Italy and that is one of my top destinations too. What has drawn you to Italy? For me I want to see Pompeii and of course the cuisine. Anyways, before I prattle on too much, I would love to hear more from you (And more about New Zealand, another one of my top places).

This next one talked about traveling the ocean for a guy (and traveling the ocean for her) and she seemed to have an off beat sense of humor. She also said she preferred men older than her and she is 31 and I do turn 32 on April 12th. She also mentioned that her prince charming fell out of a tree or got hot by a buss.

Hello, My name is Shaun and I liked your profile. I want to say I agree but traveling the ocean. Eurythmics summed it up best, "Sweet dreams are made of this. Who am I to disagree? I travel the world and the seven seas." Now that I hit you with cheesy song lyrics, I must ask if there have been any oceans you crossed? I haven't crossed any yet, but am wanting to, particularly Europe. (That would be the preferred place I would want to cross to, so if you need me to cross an ocean, try to go there) Anyways, I would love to hear more from you. P.S.I did get stuck in a tree once so that may explain things. I also turn 32 in a couple weeks. Hopefully I'm not younger