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Lapband and social life



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Hi everyone. I'm new, have my lapband consultation on 9/18. I'm honestly undecided at this point whether or not I will proceed with the surgery. I have a ton of questions for the dr. but some questions I'd love to get feedback from people who have had the surgery.

1. How much does your everyday life change after surgery?

2. I'm single. If I go to dinner on a first date, obviously I'm not going to divulge to the guy all about my lapband within the first 30 minutes of meeting him, so will my new eating habits come across as really strange?

I know these may seem like silly questions but I suffer from social anxiety and I really have to will myself to socialize at times. If I feel like I stick out like a sore thumb it would make it even harder.

I appreciate the feedback.

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Hi there, it's normal to ask alot of questions, nothing silly about it at all ! Good for you for making your health priority ! I dont know about anyone else, but my life changed 100% for the better after Lapband. No more sleep apnea, digestive issues, or being tired and out of shape 24/7. I feel strong and healthy, like what I see in the mirror, and feel much more comfortable socially. As far as eating goes ? It depends. I exercise 3-4x a week, try to follow the rules , and try to drink lots of Water. Its not hard to eat with a lapband, its "different." Not bad, different because you have to choose your food more carefully, chew well, eat slower , and pay attention and think about what and how how you're eating. My personal mantra ?, Having a lapband is an inconvenience 5% of my day, but being obese was 100 % of my day." Lapband = best decision ever !!! Very happy ! Good luck !!

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Hi there, I am very private about my band and am adept at eating out, going to parties, etc. In my case, I think instead of looking like a person who eats like a pig (the old me wanted a little more, a little more), now I appear to be a rainy eater. Getting that appetite monster off of my back is the best thing I ever did. The links below in my signatures are sources that were helpful to me when I was in the research stage. I am very glad to have gotten my life back. Best wishes to you!

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Rainy? Sorry, I can't edit on my iPad. That was meant to be a DAINTY eater. Here's to that!

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Welcome!

I live in NYC where people eat out 24/7. Guess what?? No one gives a crap what or how much you are eating. They are way more interested in what's on their plate. And I've started to introduce sharing of apps or small plates with my companion(s). Then no one even notices food left over. Works great!

Believe me...as others have said, the inconvenience of eating as a bandster is nothing compared with the inconvenience of being overweight and in my case, living with limited mobility at that time.

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Tinamarie, I forgot add something about eating /dating. Im not single, but if I was dating , and dinner plans came up I wouldnt say anything about WLS either. Tmi for a 1st date, etc. However, the few times someone's commented about a small appetizer ive orderd as my whole meal ( and sometimes I can't finish that !) I just casually tell them that I ve had some stomach issues , and that eating small amounts slowly every few hours is better for me. No one cares, we move on to other topics, and if a guy is really interested in you he's not going to care about your eating habits ! He's going to be wanting to talk and have a good time with a healthy, confident, attractive lady ! You !!!! Just sayin ' !

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First of all , do not hestitate to ask questions of your surgeon/staff. They have heard it all before and nothing should be off limits.

1. How much does your everyday life change after surgery?

My daily routine didn't change much. More exercise and much more energy. I planned meals/snacks ahead of time so I didn't slip up.

2. I'm single. If I go to dinner on a first date, obviously I'm not going to divulge to the guy all about my lapband within the first 30 minutes of meeting him, so will my new eating habits come across as really strange?

I met my boyfriend 2 weeks post-op. I eat slowly and do not think he noticed at first. I usually would ( and still do ) order a appetizer as my entree. People always box up large portions so it didn't seem so weird.

Edited by Bandora

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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