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Tired of my life like this



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Thank you for the support. The clinic did call me back and said there had been a mistake and they submitted my paperwork today. Hopefully we will have a response by Monday.



I really appreciate the feedback on using an experienced surgeon. I hadn't really thought about that, but you are exactly correct. I don't really want to have another operation, but this is one I have to have. I want the best team I can get to do this and the best in the state is at Chapel Hill.



So I have a back-up plan if they fall through, but I still feel that the best doctors are there, I just need to get there!



Thanks again! :)


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Just a quick update, I called the insurance company today and they have all of my paperwork. They should make a decision within 3 business days. They also told me the requested surgery date is July 15th.

I feel a lot better about things today.

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Hello,

I just got home from my evaluation appointment today and am now waiting to hear back about my pre-op. It was the first time in a long time that I didn't feel like a freak after leaving the doctors office. I am scared and nervous, but I know this is something I must do.

My journey down this road started in 1995. That is when I got my first hernia. It was small and appeared 6 months after I had my gall bladder removed. I didn't even know what it was but it hurt very badly and when I went to the ER they rushed me in to operate on it. I thought that was the end of it, little did I know it was only the beginning. 6 months later I had to have another emergency surgery to repair a hernia, 18 months later, another and 2 years after that I had my 4th hernia repair surgery when they removed my belly button!. I was able to make it almost 3 years before my 5th operation. Then 2 months after that I fell and broke my foot which put me in a wheel chair for 6 months and at that point, my minor dealings with my weight became a major problem as I went from 185 pounds to 270.

So I knew at that point I was going to have some major problems, my doctor said my belly looked like Swiss cheese and that any mesh they put in was just going to tear another hole. I just started to live with it and accept that I would have hernias. In the meantime I moved to NC and met another doctor who said he could fix me. So 2 operations later (7 hernia in total) I had 3 large hernias, weighed 290 pounds and had given upon getting them fixed or every being able to lose this extra weight. I accepted that I was beyond fixing and would just learn to live with this.

In December 2013 I had another major issue to deal with as I was admitted for emergency surgery to deal with a blocked intestine. I was in a week, home a week and readmitted for complications. I actually traveled out of the country in February and thought once again this was behind me. But on June 21 2014, I was once again rushed to the hospital and admitted for emergency surgery for a small bowel obstruction. I got home the day before my 50th birthday, was home a week, and readmitted with a severe infection and major complications. After a 2 and a half week stay I was allowed to go home. My 3rd time dealing with this, in February 2014, was enough, my 3rd bowel obstruction surgery in 14 months. The doctor who had done these last 3 operations told me that my abdomen was "complicated" and beyond the ability of my local hospital to deal with so he referred me to UNC to be checked by a hernia specialist there.

My wife and I had talked about me getting some type of operation to help with my weight, but after 11 operations on my belly in 20 years I figured no one would even consider the idea. But the doctor who saw me told me that I needed to lose at least 50 pounds before he could attempt to fix my hernias and suggested I get the sleeve surgery. Then I started researching, and praying and talking to my wife and my daughter and my parents, wanting to make the decision that would end this cycle and give me my life back.

I am tired, I am tired of the endless cycle of hospital stays, I am tired of feeling this way, I am tired of seeing the stress I am putting my family under, I am tired of being scared, I am tired of looking this way.

I want my life to be good again, I know that there is a chance that even if I lose the weight the hernia doctor will tell me there is nothing he can do. But I will have a better chance of getting my weight under control and at least be able to wear binders that fit to hold my hernias in.

So now I wait, they told me it will take about 1-2 weeks for my insurance to approve everything and they will get me back in to meet the surgeon and complete my pre-op and I should have the operation about a week after that. For the first time in about 10 years I feel like I am in control again, I feel like this is going to work, I feel positive that this will give me control of my life again.

I am ready, but I am scared. I guess some people would think that I have had enough operations that they should be 2nd nature to me and I guess that is part of the reason I am scared, I have had a total of 15 operations in the last 22 years. I know how hard they are and I know how bad it can get. But even knowing that, I know this is something I have to do.

So I start on this journey with my family, it is not only a change for me, but for them as well. I am blessed to have a very supportive family who is going to be with me every step of the way.

But I appreciate your support as well, the best advice is from people who have been down the path I am embarking on and I thank you in advance for any advice and feedback I get.

Sorry for such a long post, but this is the first time I have talked about all of this in quite a while.

Thanks

Edited by animallover1247

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I wanted to give everyone a short update. The insurance company approved me and the doctors office called me on Tuesday to set up my appt with the surgeon and they said July 27. I freaked out. I told them I am supposed to go back to school on Aug 12 and I needed it done as soon as possible to allow me to heal.

The next morning I got another phone call and my meeting with the surgeon is tomorrow, Mon at 1015. When I talked to his nurse she assured me the doctor will rearrange things and I will get this taken care of in the next 10 days.

I cant wait to get it finished. Even though I have not been told I had to go on a pre-op diet I have, for all intents and purposes, been on one. I have had a couple of scares with my hernias so I am very cautious about eating anything that might cause a blockage. I am dealing with a lot of belly discomfort but I am so ready to move forward.

I have 3 goals I have set for myself, well, milestones maybe:

1. I want to wear "normal" pants again. I haven't been able to do this for over a year because of the other operations I have had. I have had to wear elastic waist band athletic pants. I hate wearing those to school. I cant wait to dress like other people.

2. I want to walk down the stairs for a fire drill at school. I am on the 3rd Floor. Between my knee, my foot and the weight I cant go down 3 flights of stairs. I want to be able to make sure my students are safe, no matter what.

3. I want to be able to get certified in CPR again. I was an EMT for over 10 years and even taught CPR during that time. But because of my weight I haven't been able to do it for over 15 years. I want to be able to do that again.

I cant wait to do those things again. I cant wait to be able to move forward.

Hopefully I can update people with a very quick surgery date.

Jesse

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hope you are still on track. do you still have same surgery date?

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I met my surgeon today, Dr Farrell, the head of the center at UNC. I really like him, he answered all of my questions and really put me at ease.

They did move my date until the 23rd though. He wants to have the hernia specialist in there as well in case the runs into any problems. He is going to try to put a temporary fix in place for the biggest hernia I have to try and give me some relief.

I don't have to go on a pre-op diet per se, but I am going to stick to my soft foods so I don't run the risk of going back in the hospital before then.

Thanks for all of the support and well wishes :)

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Jesse, best of luck to you. I know your situation is a bit "special." But it sounds like things are really going your way. I don't know if you appreciate how fast this has all gone for you. But it has. That's a great sign.

Best to you!

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Tomorrow I leave to go to Chapel Hill. I will call before I leave to see what time the operation is scheduled for.

I have been working on stuff for school to try to keep my mind occupied. They say things happen when the time is right, and the time is right. Looking back at this process I cant believe I was able to get all of this taken care of in this short of a time frame. Hopefully I will be back home by Monday.

We go back to school on August 12th so hopefully I am ready for that.

Thanks for all of the support and good wishes.

Jesse

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Best of luck for a quick recovery and no complications!!

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Good luck on your procedure. I had my own frustrations with my case manager not returns phone calls, and a delay due to my sleep study in May. Things eventually got sorted out and the doc signed off on the procedure. My surgery was yesterday. Now to focus on the road ahead.

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@naturegirl I hope you are doing well. I cant believe by this time tomorrow this first step will be over.

My wife and I made it to Chapel Hill okay, got checked into the hotel and went out to eat. I had some broiled fish, steamed veggies and mashed potatoes. I resisted the urge to have the monster dessert. I am kind of proud of that, Desserts are my big weakness.

I have to be at the hospital at 830 and my surgery is scheduled for 1030. I feel nervous, just because I spent too much time thinking about what could go wrong. I only slept about 3 hours last night, partly from being nervous, partly from wanting this to be over.

All of the other operations I have had over the last 2 years were emergency ones, so I never had a chance to consider all of the possibilities. This seems more difficult for me, but my wife said she prefers this way over my other operations. My normal hospital stay has been 10 days, so I think the 2 day stay with this will hopefully go very quickly.

My pastor is coming to be with my wife during the operation, he plans to get here before my surgery so we can have prayer together. He is pretty awesome, driving 3 hours 1 way to sit with a member of his church. He told me that is what he is supposed to do, but it still means a lot to me. My family lives out of state and I am comforted to know someone is with her.

As soon as I am able to I will post an update...thanks for all of the support.

Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of my life, with the new me....

Jesse

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I had the surgery yesterday and the Dr said everything went well. I am sore, but not as bad as I get with the bowel obstructions. I am supposed to have the leak test this morning and if that is good then I start on Clear liquids. Crossing my fingers on that one.

I wanted to walk some last night, but the operation took about 3 hours and it was after 6 when I got to my room so will do that soon. I can't wait to get out of this bed.

Once again, thanks for the prayers and support.

Jesse

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I am home now! Things are going very well. I found out they had to make 2 more incisions in me than they normally make, but it was to remove scar tissue. I am now having 3 ounces of liquids every hour. So far so good. I am sore but it is bearable with the pain medicine.

I checked my weight right before we left the house on Wednesday and it was 283. I think I am going to wait until Monday to check it again and just check it on Mondays after that.

All things considered I am doing okay, thanks for the thoughts and prayers. They really mean a lot to me.

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Day 4 Post-Op Update

I decided I would only weigh myself once a week, and decided to do it on Monday. So as of this morning I am at 275, 6 pounds down from my weight on Wednesday before the surgery. I am pleased with that, I know it will fluctuate over the next few months, but it is nice to know that I am starting to lose already.

My pain management is going okay. I am still having to take the pain meds every 4 hours, but I am sure the pain level will decrease over the next few days.

I have been monitoring my BP and it has not been over 130/82 so I actually haven't taken my BP meds since before my surgery. If it gets above 130 I will take the meds again, but considering my BP was 150/100 last week without meds, that is a great improvement.

I am still drinking 3 oz of full liquids every hour and seem to be doing okay. I mix Water, Protein powder w/skim milk, and strained cream of chicken Soup. I am getting my Protein so am pleased with that as well.

Finally, the biggest fear I had was my intestines waking up. I had not had a BM by this morning so I called the clinic and we increased my Mirliax to twice a day. I took a dose around noon and things finally started working!! So my biggest fear has been dealt with and my wife and I are so relieved.

I am really pleased with how things are going and cant thank everyone enough for the thoughts and prayers, not only for me, but that we share with each other. That extra layer of support of understanding, knowing that there is a place we can turn to address fears and concerns and have them shared by people who are dealing with the same things, or who have went through them, that relief, it cant be explained. To have a place to discuss fears and concerns and share our successes, to me anyway, is vital to success of any life changing decision like this.

You, and this place, has made things so much easier for me and my family. I know we will still have our ups and downs, but for the first time in a long time, I feel like I have some control and am not only reacting to things around me.

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