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Why I didn't tell ANYONE I was having this surgery...

I just got approved this past Monday and will be having my surgery on Thursday the 23rd of this month. I'm so excited and so nervous, I have a 3 year old daughter and I'm a single mom 24/7 so she's all I have. Anyways my parents help out when I work, when I got the approval I told them both about my decision. My mom was nervous because of my daughter and my dad was totally fine with it. Today my mom calls me mad saying I should have discussed this with her and that my decisions affect everyone not just me and my daughter...she was making it about her and I'm trying to just brush it off because I really don't need any more stress then my everyday life and the surgery coming up in a week. How did you all handle people that might not have been the most supportive? I tried explaining it was my decision to make and has nothing to do with her or anyone else but she's still mad.

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Is she concerned about complications and your daughter or is she just anti-surgery? I'd try to find out what her objections are and maybe have her go to the surgeons office with you to reassure her. The more she knows may help ease her fears if that's the case. If she is just anti WLS then don't worry it's your journey. Good luck!

I agree with LaLa Lady. But in addition I would remind your mother that doing this is a decision that you are making to positively affect the outcome of all of your lives. After following through on this decision you will be around longer, and will you not place your parents in the position of having to care for your daughter because of the future heath problems you WILL experience if you don't change your behaviors.

BTW... I get sleeved on the 23rd well. Good luck and God Bless :)

I didn't tell many people either. Not for any other reason except I just didn't think it was any of their business. I told my parents, a couple of friend and of course my children. If they ask when I go back to work I will tell them then, but I didn't feel it was necessary.

  • Author

Thanks everyone. I understand the concern about my daughter, my mom helps me out a lot and of course she loves my daughter. That is my only hesitation because God forbid something happens to me from the surgery my parents would have to fight my daughter's father for her because he is a deadbeat dad but would try to get her just to be a jerk. I didn't want to tell anyone I'm embarrassed that I have gotten to this point but also so excited to start my new life with my little girl. I'm sure this will all blow over with my mom and I'm sure it's just because she's concerned but all I want right now is support, I'm already worried enough I don't need any other stress about it

  • Author

My final doctor appointment is tomorrow and I asked her of she wanted to come to ask anything but she is not going to come.

Can't wait to have it all over and stop worrying ????

I would stress that you are doing this to be around for your daughter. Invite her to this site to explore and see how awesome it is to have this life saving surgery. She is probably just scared, but if you educate her and show her that you are really ready, she should come around.

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