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One year in ... how did i fail?



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I was banded 1 year ago. I was doimg great at the beginning but somewhere down the line i just stopped! I stopped trying or caring. At one point i was ashamed of what i had done to my body. Then i would be ok with the surgery but disappointed in myself for gaining all weight back. I feel lost.

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Well here you are -- sometimes timing is everything and maybe you weren't really ready to fully commit to yourself and your healthy future. The first year of LapBand is really about keeping all those appointments with the surgeon. So now it's time to touch base. Get yourself in for an assessment. Your medical professionals are there for you and they want you to succeed. If the band is not at the right fill then your appetite is not dimmed and you're just fighting the same old battle, the one we can all identify with. I have a couple of links in my signature below that really helped me. Maybe they will help you, too. Best wishes!

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I agree with @@Bandista ….get back to your surgeon and nutritionist and maybe even the psychologist (if one is available) to help you figure out exactly what happened and why.

In my opinion, the fact that you are posting here means you want some help….kudos to you! We can only give you some moral support here…you must pick yourself up, stop beating yourself up and move forward.

Tomorrow is a new day….its the first day to the rest of your life…make it a good one and make that call!

Wishing you all the best! Keep us posted!

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Willing to help out - welcome to chat or talk about it : do anything I can to help

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My surgeon is no longer in practice. I have heard those who have responded and am very much appreciative. .. i have began a workout routine fof the avon 39 in which i am participating. I feel good. One step at a time. So thank to those who inspired.

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Check with the hospital and see where the rest of his patients went. It's like using a hacksaw when you need a screwdriver If you don't get your fills. Right tool for the right job.

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I was banded 1 year ago. I was doimg great at the beginning but somewhere down the line i just stopped! I stopped trying or caring. At one point i was ashamed of what i had done to my body. Then i would be ok with the surgery but disappointed in myself for gaining all weight back. I feel lost.

What about the band??

Your post says "I' just stopped, "I" stopped trying/caring, and on and on....you never mention the band.

Did the band ever contribute to your weight loss? Was your band working, then suddenly stop?

Only reason I say this, because in MY life, "I" could never do anything to loose weight. Your post sounds like me before surgery.,..I did well for maybe a year, then failed miserably, gaining it all back, feeling ashamed and depressed...100's of times.

My health was suffering because of it...so my PCP, as a LAST RESORT, referred me to a Weight Loss surgeon...I never dreamed I was a candidate, maybe it was denial...maybe it was for failures, the easy way out....

That was 4 years ago. The band has done what I was unable to do. I may want to stop, feel less motivated, have good days and bad days, stress, grief, parties, vacations, but the band does not change because of those things...it was surgery. Something physically altered, changed, within my digestive tract...

Bottom line...best decision I ever made....

So, if I was your surgeon, I would be wondering and examining why that thing I installed is not doing what was intended to do.

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Amanda, I've had a similar experience & can completely understand and empathize.

I was banded in August 2010, I was desperate, had been battling my weight for 15 years. I didn't really prepare myself mentally for it & thought it would be a quick fix.

For the first year I did ok but then I didn't listen to my body & started eating bigger portions & all the wrong foods, I was constantly being sick because of binging, got to the point I couldn't even keep liquid down but I thought this was good because it would mean I would lose weight!!

Finally after not being able to cope with the discomfort I got it emptied, blaming everything on the band!

I then tried every fad going......lived on shakes for months until I got to the stage normal food made me wretch & I didn't want to eat. I was so depressed I then went to the other end of the spectrum & starting binging in secret.....even taking food to the bathroom to have in secret......disgusting!!

I realized in October 2013 I had issues & went to my GP he referred me to a eating disorder specialist......this was the turning point......I saw her every week together with a psychologist and managed to get to the bottom of my food issues which weren't actually food.......it could have been any addiction, drugs, alcohol anything I could use as a crutch.

I have now been discharged from their care and have taken the first steps to lose the weight (I'm now 50lbs heavier than when I was banded).......I got my first fill 2 weeks ago & have been patient and sensible & now realize it's simply a helpful tool but you need to work with it and change your eating habits & mental attitude to succeed.

Good luck Amanda I wish you well xx

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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