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When will it get better?



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I'm so tired of not being able to eat. Well, I can eat but I hate it. I'm still pretty new to this lifestyle so I'm trying to figure out what I can tolerate. It's weird because I get hungry but the thought of eating is such a turn off. I'm miserable and at times I imagine reversing the procedure. However, I remember why I had it. I had several co morbidities, a super high bmi and was in pain. I couldn't walk a store. I needed the dreaded mobile cart. I don't need that now and have been taken off all of my meds. 6 weeks out I'm down 49 pounds. But I'm so unhappy with how I feel. How can I get my meals in when the thought of eating and the thought of the awful feeling of the food getting stuck is enough to scare me from eating? Even with the progress I've made, I'm still full of regret. If I could reverse it, I think I would. Any advice would be welcomed.

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All I can say is it gets better, keep doing what your supposed to. Eat slowly, small amounts at a time. Walk or exercise as much as you can and drink plenty of water! Good luck and keep us posted!

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Does your program have a psychologist who could maybe help you with some ways to deal with these feelings? Don't give up - hang in there!

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It took me 6 months to get to a happy state.

I found that if I mix foods together, it produced more flavor and it went down easier. I use home made high Protein chili and Soups for my meals. I have included a short article about my experience (including recipes) on the internet. Here is a link. http://www.breadandbutterscience.com/Surgery.pdf

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When you learn how to eat super slow it gets easier. I also found that once I started back working out & resuming normal activities I felt better. For a while I didn't have much of an appetite, but u could eat enough to get in my Protein & Water.

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So much of what we deal with has nothing to do with the weight loss after the surgery; it is the mental battle. The fact that food was our emotional support, our comfort and our go to crisis coping mechanism makes the surgery for some very hard as that comfort is now gone.

I have redirected myself and continue to have to do so...instead of eating to relieve stress or find comfort, I walk or play a game online or read or.....You have to find something to replace the food as a "go to relationship" for issues.
The mental battle is real and talking with someone about it can really help. Being on here and seeing that others go through what we go through really helps. I hope you don't really regret the surgery...I have found that I feel so much better physically and have more energy and I am 7 months out down 112 pounds.

I am in a stall phase and while that stinks, it forces me to look at how I am caring for myself...am I getting enough Protein, calories, exercise etc...

My focus is on a healthier me and one that will feel good for years to come. This helps me to be more self confident, self assured in my decisions and my life as well as a kinder and more understanding person.

The doctor retrained your stomach; now it's up to us to retrain our brains and our hearts :)

Thinking of you and look forward to hearing from you :)

C

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I understand how you feel. I too have thoughts about reversing my surgery. I am 3 weeks post op. I still have a lot of pain in my left side. My doctor thinks its a pulled muscle. So I have to limit my activity and be very careful how I move around. I need to get back to my life. I have a family I need to be taking care of. Meal time has become a chore that I hate. I am so over pureed foods. People keep telling me to be patient and that it will get better. I just need to see a glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel.

I hope it gets better for the both of us. Good luck!

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Thank you guys sooooo much!!! You have given me such encouragement and wisdom. I have so much other stuff going on. I didn't realize how dependent I was on food. Wow! While I still struggle with regret I know I made the right decision.

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I understand how you feel. I too have thoughts about reversing my surgery. I am 3 weeks post op. I still have a lot of pain in my left side. My doctor thinks its a pulled muscle. So I have to limit my activity and be very careful how I move around. I need to get back to my life. I have a family I need to be taking care of. Meal time has become a chore that I hate. I am so over pureed foods. People keep telling me to be patient and that it will get better. I just need to see a glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel.

I hope it gets better for the both of us. Good luck!

I will be honest. I may be in a bad spot but you are worse than me lol that dreaded first month honey... lol no one could have prepared me for it. But I can honestly say you will get better.

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Those first few weeks after my surgery are almost a blur for me now (6 months post op) but I do remember literaly crying to my friend with regret because I hated how limited I was and how stagnet I felt with the soft foods and having to think SO much in regards to when/what to eat and how to do it slow, have no fluids before/after .... it was insane and I hated it .... but it really did get better. Not sure just when but when I returned to work and back into the swing of things i remember one day thinking ...huh ..... no angsty moments today, i ate decently ... people were calling me "Skinny Mini" in the office and it was a good feeling .... so give yourself time because as hard as it is, before you know it you will be 6 months out and in such a good place mentally and physically that you will honestly think the surgery was the best thing you have ever done for yourself ..... good luck :)

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For me, the first six weeks were pretty tough. After that, I was fully healed and I was cleared for a "normal" diet, and I've been pretty good ever since. But I really started feeling good after I started exercising, which was for me around week 8. It gets better, just hang in there, follow your doctor's instructions, and you'll do great!

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For me, the first six weeks were pretty tough. After that, I was fully healed and I was cleared for a "normal" diet, and I've been pretty good ever since. But I really started feeling good after I started exercising, which was for me around week 8. It gets better, just hang in there, follow your doctor's instructions, and you'll do great!

Thank you!!! I really hope so...

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      1. Selina333

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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