Surgery is 17, I am dropping off my dog at her hous-so me and husband can go to Mexico. 'Yes mom, I'm going to the border of Mexico to have cheap, invasive, permanent surgery so I can lose weight...wish me luck'. I can't tell her that, so what should I do?

I dreaded telling my parents, but when I did, they were incredibly supportive. Maybe your mom will surprise you.

You know, I feel you on not wanting to tell your mother. My surgery is February 12th. I didn't want to tell my parents either. Particularly my mother. She is a lifetime weight watcher who touts what it was like when she was 160 pounds. I also didn't want to tell my boyfriend. I told them that I was having a liver biopsy, which was a partial truth.

I'm 44. I'm "grown" and my parents are intelligent. If you drop weight as quickly as folks tend to do with weight loss surgery, folks will either deduce that you had weight loss surgery or think that you are ill. Either way, they will be concerned.

Last night, I told my mother. I said it conversationally, while shopping at Walgreens. She asked what I was shopping for. I told her the magnesium caltrate. She asked why I needed that and asked what I getting a colonoscopy. I told her no, I need it before my surgery. I mentioned I had told her about the liver biopsy. I told her I had my final pre-op the day before and I decided to have my stomach stapled. I told her the surgeon could do it while he is doing my liver biopsy and the whole thing should only take 45 minutes to an hour.

She may have been taken aback, but she said, "oh" then she mentioned she would pray for me because that is all that she can do. That was it.

Part of being "grown" is owning your decisions and choices. People are always going to talk and have something to say. My family was there for me when I had rhabdomyolysis. That showed me they would do anything for me. While they may disagree with my decision and think it irrational and unnecessary, they know I need to lose weight. They know my health will improve if I lose weight. They disagree with the methodology. Surgery scares everyone, especially what is "considered" elective surgery. Weight loss surgery is "considered" elective. That is why you have to do the 3 or 6 month pre-op and stress over whether the surgery will be approved or not.

Why can you just lose the weight naturally. So and so did it. Why can't you do weight watchers? Well, why can't people just stop smoking or stop doing drugs or any other addiction? Because if it were that easy, there would be no addiction in the first place or results of the addiction. If your choice is to claim your life, then take it back from everyone, including the people who you are allowing to make you hold your emotions captive.

Best of luck on whatever decision you choose.

Wait. I didn't lose weight naturally?