Other Peoples Opinions

[Stephanie Salsera Perrott 85]

Unsolicited Advice. Thoughts? I once had someone say to me “If you stopped drinking soda you’d lose weight.” Now let’s break that down. First of all, we had just left a Water park and not once did I say “got any advice on losing weight?” Therefore, once can assume several things but let’s err on the side of caution. Let’s assume this friend noticed something about my actions that day that suggested I am uncomfortable with my body. Can I point out 95% of the people at that park probably felt the same way? But that’s beside the point. So let’s assume this unsolicited advice is their attempt to help you solve something that is obviously bothering you. What is your response to that? We just came from a Water park screw you for mentioning my faults. It’s diet soda and if you had half a brain you’d know besides slightly expanding your tummy and the sodium and chemicals inside the drink no one ever got fat on diet soda but rather the 3 doughnuts and pizza may be the culprit? And why is unsolicited advice always so blunt? What if, God forbid, you said to a friend it seems your weight concerns you, or your relationship or your family or your job or your financial situation, would you mind if I tried to help? Would you mind if I shot some ideas your way but in no way or terms do I think I’m superior or have all the answers? Would you mind if I tried to help even if you took it the wrong way? Are you open to suggestions? food for thought. (pun intended).

[Stevehud 1,790]

it would be nice to facepalm yourself and say "gee i never thought of that." in a very sarcastic voice. But people would think you were the rude one. its a no win situation. although there is a great deal to be said for sarcasm!

[JackieBrown 183]

I'd just suck on that straw until I hit the bottom with lots of noise, staring at the offending person the whole time. Then say, "Hm!" as if they had just confirmed your bad opinion of them, and walk away. No need to be nice with jerks.

[imsoglad56 402]

My response to that kind of "helpful" advice has become "thank you, I'll give your advice all the consideration it deserves."

[CowgirlJane 14,261]

why i agree with your point (helpful advice isn't very helpful!) your advisor is correct that there is evidence that drinking diet soda triggers hunger and therefore is NOT an effective solution to reducing calorie intake while drinking soda.

anyway, it is kind of weird that people feel the need to tell you this unsolicited...

[jillstl 55]

I use to complain about my weight to my mother all the time and I think that by doing that, it gave her and open invitation to give me "unsolicited" advice. I don't know... just another view point. Some may say you just someone to listen and not put their 2 cents in but sometimes it is coming from a place of love even if the delivery sucks.

[jillstl 55]

I wasn't suggesting that you were complaining about your weight to your friend. I just know that as an overweight person I've often complained about it to the people that I was closest to and there were times when I wasn't asking for that type of advice they just felt the need to give it to me when the opportunity arose.

[Sharon1964 2,530]

So let’s assume this unsolicited advice is their attempt to help you solve something that is obviously bothering you.

That's an assumption that would have NEVER crossed my mind.

I'm in the "all the consideration it deserves" camp.