Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Weight loss drives a whole new sex drive



Recommended Posts

I've lost 140 pounds + husband's lost 60 pounds = revived sex lives.

I don't know if hormonal changes are added to this equation, but whatever it is....... thank GOD!

We've been married 26 years, raised/raising four kids and we unfortunately put ourselves on the back burner for far too long.

Not anymore.......... Revived energy from exercising, sooooo much less body fat, and more time on our hands....... YIPPEE!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can't give an accurate reaction to this, cuz I just started seeing someone new and that right there is the whole new relationship sex, vs renewed sex lol. But I do find that I enjoy it more and that I sweat less that is for sure!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wish i had this lol, i am struggling in the complete opposite. My bf always wants it and i have no interest at all....i mean zero...i never really did, but now its completely dead it feels like

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wish i had this lol, i am struggling in the complete opposite. My bf always wants it and i have no interest at all....i mean zero...i never really did, but now its completely dead it feels like

@hopeliveshere...I'm more like you. If my drive is a 2, my hubbie's is a 10. :blink: I always thought it was because I hated my body/weight more than anything. I have had my T level checked and it was in the acceptable range.

Fingers crossed that things change as the weight goes down. But I also know our hormones are doing crazy things to us at the same time.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@hopeliveshere...I'm more like you. If my drive is a 2, my hubbie's is a 10. :blink: I always thought it was because I hated my body/weight more than anything. I have had my T level checked and it was in the acceptable range.

Fingers crossed that things change as the weight goes down. But I also know our hormones are doing crazy things to us at the same time.

I've never had my T level checked, i just always figured i wasnt a "sexual person". i honestly have to try to think about it for days before so i can get myself like a little caesars pizza ( hot and ready, LMAO)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My sex drive went missing a few years ago and I have yet to find it. Made posters and files a missing sex drive report with my GYN. To date it has not been found. At this point I'm not even sure if I want it back were it to decide to come back, but we'll see. To those of you enjoying..........have fun ladies.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I used to have a very high sex drive.....no longer. After menopause it seemed to just disappear. I don't know if it is coming back or not. I'm only halfway to my goal so I'm holding out hope that at least a little of it will return. If not, I'm not even going to think about re-entering the dating scene.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Lyrica causes problems for me, because it tames nerve endings, but isn't specific. It tames ALL nerve endings, including the pleasure ones. However, I also take Wellbutrin and it helps balance things out.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've lost 140 pounds + husband's lost 60 pounds = revived sex lives.

I don't know if hormonal changes are added to this equation, but whatever it is....... thank GOD!

We've been married 26 years, raised/raising four kids and we unfortunately put ourselves on the back burner for far too long.

Not anymore.......... Revived energy from exercising, sooooo much less body fat, and more time on our hands....... YIPPEE!

Love it!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I used to have a very high sex drive.....no longer. After menopause it seemed to just disappear. I don't know if it is coming back or not. I'm only halfway to my goal so I'm holding out hope that at least a little of it will return. If not, I'm not even going to think about re-entering the dating scene.

Yeah, menopause really puts a damper on sex drive. I used to be in heat 24/7. Now? Ugh... I'm like.....what the hell happened?!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm falling in the "no drive" category myself. I thought I was all alone, glad I'm not! I must say ladies, for those of you with higher libido - that is awesome! I had hopes in the back of my mind that my drive would pick up after some weight loss because I was having problems in that area pre-surgery. Not so much. In fact, everything seems different including my physiological response. It doesn't even FEEL the same anymore. I was checked for pre-menopause before surgery and I was not. I have an appt. here in a few weeks with my OB. I wonder if the surgery has pushed me towards menopause hormonally speaking. I'm 44.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The fat in our bodies stores estrogen which is actually a female hormone. As we lose weight this is released to some degree back into the body so it's true our hormones are affected. Those still with menses might notice increased fertility, or wonky cycles.

For those of us past that phase in our lives, it can increase your libido a bit and also put a damper on it since the ratio of hormones is out of balance and it's not so easy to "feel" awesome when your off kilter.

That said...

I think that having a kicking libido is more about your "mind set" then it is about what your body is doing. As we get older, sure we have still 101 things going on in our lives and yes we can kick sex to the back burner because it's not as important as it was as we were in our 30's to have families etc. even if we weren't trying to procreate at that time the natural urge is there.

So if your not "having fun" take the time to figure out why not? If your not sure see the Dr. to rule out medical causes, and then get your head around it :)

Maybe there is something missing that you need to set that spark afire. Could be simple communication with your partner. I find that in life communication is the key to just about everything, and you need to be speaking the same language or at least have a translation dictionary available for quick reference :)

Feeling good, looking good, being healthy and happy....go for it!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think so many of us have put sex on the back burner. the old saying of not using you lose it applies. need to rev up our sexual urges by using it. start alone or whatever and see if you can feel again. and don't forget some medications really lower libido.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That said...

I think that having a kicking libido is more about your "mind set" then it is about what your body is doing. As we get older, sure we have still 101 things going on in our lives and yes we can kick sex to the back burner because it's not as important as it was as we were in our 30's to have families etc. even if we weren't trying to procreate at that time the natural urge is there.

100% on point for me Lisa... I was in a bad marriage, overweight and miserable, of COURSE there was no sex drive. Seven years out of that marriage and 56 pounds off my 5'4" frame, 14 pounds from my conservative goal weight, rocking size 6 jeans and able to wear all those lacy sexy things from the stores in the mall that don't carry any size above a large???? Um, yes, I'm feeling pretty frisky! lol Add a new man into that equation (who constantly tells me I'm hot -- I have to tell myself to believe and accept that)... let's just say if women are in their prime in their 40s and I've wasted 8 years of that, I'm planning to make up for some lost time! :)

Sorry if TMI! lol

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×