Death of my husband 7 weeks today and up 23 pounds since January.

[moonlitestarbrite 902]

hang in there. take all the time you need to decide about a revision. just focus on trying to take care of yourself as best you can.

[Ladybandito 516]

Oh, Lisa, I stumbled on your post somehow (I am a bander) and it touched my heart. I am sending you love, light and prayers.

The suggestion of drinking Protein shakes is a good one. May I also suggest hard exercise? Working out was the only thing that brought me relief when I lost someone I loved very much recently. It did something, I don't know what, to make me feel alive and in the moment, for brief periods of time. And we need that, so very much, when we're overwhelmed with grief.

I am sorry you lost your beautiful husband. He is still lovingly watching over you, I'm sure. Xx

[Chelenka 827]

Dearest Lisa: your poem is so beautiful just like the love you shared with your husband. I know you are so devastated and I hope you can begin to care for your self bit by bit. Cowgirl jane and Isareno's advice is really good, IMO. May God send you lots of love and light. Helen

[buplee 556]

My condolences to you on your loss. I know it must be very hard for you, but I hope you find comfort from the people who care for you.

[New1 201]

Lisa, I'm so sorry to learn of your beloved husband's passing. Peace be with you. I too underestimated what a loss might do to my post goal progress. I am finding it very difficult to get my head and my heart back to some sense of normalcy. I don't have any advice just wishing the best for you.

[M2G 1,836]

Lisa I've been away from the boards for a while and I'm sorry to learn of your loss. You wrote a beautiful poem and I can't even begin to imagine your pain. I'm just so sorry. Hugs.

[Lisa's Hope 421]

Lisa I've been away from the boards for a while and I'm sorry to learn of your loss. You wrote a beautiful poem and I can't even begin to imagine your pain. I'm just so sorry. Hugs.

Thank you so much. I had his headstone set yesterday. It was a hard day. I'm so upset. I miss him more than I can even express. I'm still gaining weight. Lord, I need help. I'm not eating just still drinking the sugar in coffee and eating fudgesicles. So basically. I'm addicted to sugar but only the kind I drink or like I said fudgesicles. My PCP did labs and told me my metabolism is non existent. I need to get out and walk and stop the stupid fudgesicles!! Pray for me. I'm so scared I'm going to gain back ALL of my weight. :'( He was 48. His birthday is coming up next month. God help me love myself because he wouldn't want this for me. Here is a picture of his stone. He loved his trucks. He built them from the frame up. The one on the stone is his last project. A 1949 Chevrolet. God I miss him.

[Georgia 2,911]

The headstone and pic looks awesome, Lisa. Praying for you today. I know, like you said, your husband would want you to have a rich, fulfilling life. I believe you can and will.

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

Lisa, I know you are grieving terribly. I really understand that.

But have you and your PCP discussed whether an antidepressant would benefit you at this point?

(Very sincere question.)

[Chelenka 827]

Dear Lisa: my heart goes out to you. You have been so incredibly brave and strong in facing your husband's death and caring for him. I think you may be experiencing PTSD. I went thru this after the death of my brother with whom I was very close. He suffered greatly and I was there with him. Here are some suggestions.

1. If you haven't already please find a grief counselor or group to attend.

2. Try an antidepressant medication to see if it helps you.

3. Don't buy anymore fudge-sickles, you are in an addiction-like behavior.

4. Try to take small, positive steps in your self-care. Drink some ensure, take your Vitamins and supplements, have one meal of real food, take a 1/2 hour walk; whatever you feel will help.

5. Write in a journal everything you are feeling and all your memories of your husband. Try to write about the joyful times you had together and all the things about him that you loved. Try to shift your focus away from all that he suffered. He would not want you to be stuck in those memories and would want you to remember him in his prime.

I have no doubt he is an angel now watching over you. Try to feel the love of his presence in your life, even though his physical life has ended.

I hope my thoughts are helpful to you.

[M2G 1,836]

The headstone is lovely, and that is a great way to honor his love of trucks.

I love Chelenka's suggestions Lisa. Take small steps. Do one good thing for yourself today. Sending you a hug and praying for you...

Edited October 4, 2014 by M2G

[WifeyMaterial 139]

Sorry for your lost hope things get better

[Lisa's Hope 421]

Lisa I've been away from the boards for a while and I'm sorry to learn of your loss. You wrote a beautiful poem and I can't even begin to imagine your pain. I'm just so sorry. Hugs.

Thank you so much.

[natalie_christin 61]

I'm so sincerely sorry for your loss. It's a tough time to not only deal with the grieving process but also have a surgery where it requires you to focus on yourself in order to be successful while you'restill in the grieving process. Give yourself some time and don't be hard on yourself. I know it's easier said than done but you'll find your path and you'll also be successful. I'm sure this is it what you want to hear but just give it time. Things will unfold and you find your niche and lose the weight that you want. I think you said that you put off blood work and things of that nature but it's really important to follow through with that type of stuff because could be going on and preventing you from losing the weight – you never now. I know it's hard to focus on yourself when you're grieving for someone you love so very much but you'll find your way.

You're in our thoughts and prayers

Blessings