One of the things I keep reading over and over in posts is "how much did you loose in 3 days/weeks/minutes/nanoseconds?" and, of course, "I'm stalled for 3 days/weeks/minutes/nanoseconds please help!"

I'll start by admitting that pre-op, I too looked at others results and did some number crunching in my head. I projected and I planned and I was hopeful. And in that respect, perhaps such posts have a powerful influence, since it can get one to pick up the phone and make that first call.

But once that first step is taken, the journey becomes the individuals, and theirs alone. And no number crunching and projecting is going to change how one's own natural healing process is going to progress.

So, I ask, what's your hurry?

The road to the goal is not linear. We must acknowledge and embrace a process of push and pull, pros and cons, give and take, and ups and downs. And when we are feeling up, for heaven's sake, enjoy it! Cherish those moments. Every. Single. Second. Celebrate. Sing in the shower. Go fishing. Dance naked around the house. Build on that joy, because the effects are cumulative. And it will get you through times when things are not so optimal. Trust the process. Before you know it, you'll be dancing/singing/celebrating once again.

So, I'll ask again, what's your hurry?

I believe in setting goals. I believe in developing a clear vision of a healthy future. But it's in the journey, the process, and the day-to-day choices where the real transformation occurs. And if one is not enjoying every "up" second of that process, and working through every "down" second, they would have gotten to their goal without really knowing how they got there.

So, in conclusion I ask, what's your hurry?

Edited May 31, 201412 yr by DeniseNCC1701

@@jenpez No worries about hijacking and…

@@obramj Jenpez offered some great suggestions… pretty much what I would have written myself. It's critical that you build a support team around you now to help you back up. I hope you are able to find the strength to push through this rough time. I may be a complete stranger, but I know you can do it. And I know it's in you. Dig deep!

Be well, everyone…

Edited June 8, 201412 yr by DeniseNCC1701

But back to the original topic - When I first starting coming here, I didn't know how to use the site. I had a lot of clinical knowledge about surgery and statistics, and had great prep from my medical team, but I didn't have a lot of first hand, real life information. I got lots of great information and didn't need to ask those questions, because someone else always did, just like they are now. People usually answer, and you'll get a variety of responses. So, while you can search, it's a little less interactive that way. Some people probably need the interactive support group environment, as opposed to a research type of interaction.

As for the ability or inability to enjoy or even realize it's a "journey", I think that comes with time for many people. It takes a long time to really figure out how weight loss works for some people, particularly if they have not been successful. I think most people understand it's not magic or automatic, but no one wants to find that they are the only one it "won't work" for. When you are eating almost nothing compared to what you used to eat and have so far to go and have no history to tell you it will be OK, I think it's normal to get a little worried. In the beginning, I was sure every pound I lost would be the last. I still think that, lol!

And one other thing about the "hurry". Once we've made up our minds, we want to see progress. It's human nature to want instant gratification. It's one of the reasons we eat. And quite truthfully, of you are like me, you can put on weight WAY faster than you can lose it. I've found it much easier to be patient at this weight than at 300 pounds. At least I can look and feel pretty good while I'm waiting to finish my "journey". And I say "finish" because that's how I feel. I want to check the box. Goal accomplished. Complete what I set out to do. Then I can start the next "journey". For me, it's easier to handle in smaller doses.

So, when I get tired of the daily question about "it's been 2 weeks and I've only lost 20 pounds, I just smile and move on. There's also an abundance of people on here who are new experts, and I just let them take it

there are a lot of people here who have very disordered relationships with their bodies. surgery doesnt magically change that. surgery can sometimes even make it worse. instead of eating healthy and living a healthy lifestyle, many people become obsessed with the scale the same way they were obsessed with food. its very complicated. i have one friend who is getting close to having wls. we were talking the other night and she just wants to have the surgery, lose the weight and never think about it again. being healthy doesnt work like that. but sometimes its just way easier to distract ourselves from mindful living by focusing on other things.