Every day I think about my surgery and alternate between relief that it is almost here and doubt that I'm doing the right thing. I tell myself that cutting away most of a perfectly normal organ is no big deal and the surgery is pretty routine by now. Then I wonder what my new normal will feel like once I get through my recovery period. I think that is the part that causes the most anxiety for me; who will I be once the majority of the weight loss is past and the novelty has worn off? Will I have some kind of normal life or will I never feel like myself again? Does anyone else feel like this?

Then I kick myself because I've been working towards this surgery since last Nov so I'm going to make it work and try not to worry about possible future anxiety. I dont know if anyone else did this, but during my 6 months of supervised weight loss, I didn't take it seriously at first, and considered it just part of the hoops I had to jump through for insurance. I gained a few pounds here and there and got a serious warning after the surgery class at the hospital where they told us that weight gain at this time could be grounds for a denial. I began my diet and managed to drop 10 pounds by my final doctor appt but I was worried before that weigh-in.

Now I'm 3 days in to my pre-surgery diet and I got a bit of a late start due to work travel. I missed the first 3 days of my diet but have been determined to make it up since the goal is to have a less fatty liver so no cheating during these 7 days. I thought this would be harder but I'm doing pretty well I think. I can't take some of my Vitamins but I'm not as hungry as I thought I'd be. I think I've sort of psyched myself into this liquids and one small meal zone so that food isn't really an issue for now. Feels like that could change any time but I'll take my victories where I find them. Went to dinner with my family last night, an italian place, but I was up to the challenge. I would rather get creative with menu choices than tell my husband no dinners out. We all needed this time to hang out together. I ordered a half-size spinach salad with grilled chicken and skipped the bread and I felt great and salad was good. After surgery I'm taking two weeks off from eating out at restaurants but pre-surgery I have more menu options.

I think this is the point where some might be tempted to cancel surgery because weight loss is going well. Did anyone cancel their surgery less than a week out? This must be diet amnesia because I'm sure we've all been on diets where we lost and gained it back. I know that I couldn't sustain this forever on my own and would invent a reason not to continue with a diet (vacation, stress at work, travel, family issues, etc) I think the success of this surgery is that we don't have to worry about weak willpower and failure. I'm lucky that I don't really have a sweet tooth but I'll probably have a pizza or burrito attack at some point. Right now, I'm living on every type of low or no sugar drinks and Atkins shakes. I like the Atkins shakes but I need to remember to order the powders?utm_source=BariatricPal&utm_medium=Affiliate&utm_campaign=CommentLink" target="_ad" data-id="1" >unjury Protein for after surgery...

What sustains me are the success stories here where so many have lost weight and feel great. All of the medical statistics in the world can't compete with these real-life stories and I thank you all for sharing. I'm trying to keep up with this tradition and promise full disclosure along the way. My pre-op appt. is this Wed and surgery Thurs. Strangly, after reading other stories, I'm most worried about the gas pains! I wonder how soon after surgery I can drive and will feel like going out. I haven't seen many details so would love to hear what I might expect.

I'm hoping for another significant weight loss this Wed and will share my experience. To those just starting out, hang on, it's a bit of an emotional roller coaster!

I cant finish a whole shake yet and will start trying harder tomorrow. sleeping ok and not hungry or excessively tired. Getting up and down from chairs and beds is painful but im sure it will get better. I still have the hebiclens they had me scrub with before surgery so I'm still scrubbing my stomach and incision area with it to help make sure I don't get an infection.

I love not being hungry. Im trying to focus on walking and liquids and Vitamins but I need to build up my Protein. I'm glad the atkins shakes still taste good to me since I stocked up before surgery.

I'll weigh this Thursday and compare to pre-surgery weight and see how I do. Glad I don't have to go back to work for a bit since I need more sleep than usual. I feel good and am so glad I didn't talk myself out of surgery due to nerves. I sure didn't want heart disease or diabetes and I was getting close to both of them I'm sure. Now I'm making plans to toss the xxl clothes out and in the store today I let myself really look at the normal sized clothes and can't wait until I'm shopping in the dept with the cute clothes and so many choices. Yeah, I'll give up some food for that pleasure!

Reading all this from preoperative to postoperative comments it is like someone repeating my thoughts. I am 3 days post opening and still feeling tired and gassy but nothing I can't manage. I know I would not be able to loose the amount of weight I need to without this surgery, so the occasional negative thoughts soon pass. It's really good being able to hear other people's stories, I really think people can't understand this unless they have been through it.

Here's to our new lives.

Today I made liquid Protein a priority and managed to use my Blender Bottle to blend one Atkins mocha latte drink mix, some milk and a scoop of chocolate Protein powder. It took me awhile to get through it but it counts as liquid too so I just plowed on. Drinking flavored Water is easier than drinking my protein. Got in my b12 and fiber/calcium gummies. I'll take my multi-vitamin with dinner Protein shake.

Finally broke down and weighed myself this morning and I'm down 2 pounds from surgery weight and it isnt much but that's ok. Im still working on a liquid and walking routine and I know those 2 pounds wont be coming back. I'll weigh again this thursday on my 1 week surgery anniversary date.

I feel like I'm settling into a new normal and then I'll have to learn how to eat again. I'm pretty happy on just liquids though especially since it's warm and im trying to get in some sun too while I'm off work. I found a water flavored drink mix, Crystal Light Pure, sweetened with Truvia. I like kiwi strawberry but bought lemonade too. I'm not a big fan of splenda or some of the other artificial sweeteners. My stomach does random gurgles but I've learned to listen to it and wait until it subsides before sending down more liquid.

The muscles across my abdomen still hurt and my 5 incision sites are starting to itch so that's a good sign. Glad my doc took the time to suction the gas out after surgery. He really helped minimize my discomfort.

Now, what sizes to buy swimsuits in? Next two sizes smaller should get me through the next couple of months, don't you think? What a great problem to have!

Edited June 2, 201412 yr by hrhlaurie

Forgot to ask, does anyone know how soon I should be able to have fruit smoothies?

Edited June 2, 201412 yr by hrhlaurie

There are some people who cancel right before surgery because they are doing so well and believe they can do it on their own. And you know what? I've been around this forum long enough to see what happens . . . they come back six months later and post something like this: I'm starting all over with my surgery process. I thought I could do this on my own (or: I got a terrible case of nerves or: a black cat crossed my path on the way to the hospital and I thought God was sending me a signal not to have surgery - you get the picture) and now I've re-gained all the pre-op weight I lost plus put on another thirty pounds . . . I wish I hadn't canceled etc. etc. Last minute jitters and doubts and episodes of magical thinking of "hey I can do this on my own" (despite a lifetime of evidence to the contrary) are perfectly normal. Keep reminding yourself of why you need and want to have this surgery, and all the positive outcomes you can expect. A couple of quick bits of advice -- not that you asked -- I would give yourself longer than two weeks away from restaurants after your surgery, and I would order a bunch of different samples and starter kits of different Protein brands so that you can decide what you like after surgery before committing to a particular brand or flavor. powders?utm_source=BariatricPal&utm_medium=Affiliate&utm_campaign=CommentLink" target="_ad" data-id="1" >unjury is great and their chocolate Splendor has been a mainstay for me in my almost-year after surgery, but I didn't order a full tub until I tried it after surgery. Good luck!

Thanks for this! My surgery is tomorrow at 11:30 and I definitely have last minute jitters!

You'll do great, just be ready to deal with the pain and discomfort of surgery and know that it will pass before you know it. It's like tiny tummy boot camp, the pain of change to achieve our goals. I knew it would hurt and being in the hospital wouldn't be fun and I'd have gas and all of the other pains and thought I was so prepared until day after surgery when I was nauseous from anesthesia, so weak that walking the hospital hallway was like an Olympic event for me, it hurt to get in and out of bed and I really didn't want broth or the Protein shake. I reminded myself that not only was this a voluntary surgery but I had planned for it since last Nov. That night I kind of turned a corner and I felt much better the next day and I was so glad I persevered.

I hope your surgery goes really well and hang in there for the next few days!

Edited June 3, 201412 yr by hrhlaurie

@@hrhlaurie

Forgot to ask, does anyone know how soon I should be able to have fruit smoothies?

It really depends on your surgeon's/dietician's guidelines. I wasn't allowed fruit until the soft foods stage, which was 8 weeks post op for me. Even since I've been allowed fruit, I rarely put it in my Protein shakes. Very rarely I'll do a quarter cup of raspberries or blueberries or something like that. I keep under 60 carbs per day so eating a lot of fruit (let alone drinking it in a smoothie) just isn't in the cards for me. I try to focus on protein first, green veggies second, and only then consider fruit.

Thanks, I'd like to have some watermelon this summer and wasn't sure how that fits in. I'm seeing my Nut in a few weeks ago I'll check with her.

Down a few more pounds today so something's working right!

Today I was down a few more pounds, 5 since surgery and 25 total. My arms are starting to look a bit flappy where they were just big before. My inner thighs now have a new, looser look as do my hands and chin area. Daily changes to adapt to but on the road to 100 pounds weight lose I knew I was making trade offs. I had 6 months to decide if I wanted to stay obese or do what it takes to lose weight and be healthy. I am using stretch mark creme now and will start wrapping my legs and arms to tighten them until I can stay working out. Every little bit helps!

Weird, I think I have hunger pangs tonight, even after all of my Protein today. Kind of funny that my new little tummy thinks it's ready to tackle food. I'm just sipping Water until bedtime but maybe I'll try a little high-protein yogurt tomorrow and see how it handles it.

I didn't expect this development and thought my stomach was still in full-on healing mode, but I'm a veteran of the diet wars and a hungry stomach doesn't scare me. Take a number, tiny tummy, a bigger stomach than yours has growled at me for years so you can just dial yourself back and follow the nutritionist's program.

Stay tuned...

Weird, I think I have hunger pangs tonight, even after all of my protein today. Kind of funny that my new little tummy thinks it's ready to tackle food. I'm just sipping water until bedtime but maybe I'll try a little high-protein yogurt tomorrow and see how it handles it. I didn't expect this development and thought my stomach was still in full-on healing mode, but I'm a veteran of the diet wars and a hungry stomach doesn't scare me. Take a number, tiny tummy, a bigger stomach than yours has growled at me for years so you can just dial yourself back and follow the nutritionist's program. Stay tuned...

Funny you should say that I got my sleeve on the 29th and I am starting to have hunger pangs too... Gurgulina (what I named my new stomach) is being a bit of a diva about things- she thinks she is ready for something a little thicker and more substantial than my thin protein shots (two oz per hour). I just try to ignore her griping and push on.

Good for you, same here. I was going to jump ahead to yogurt but decided to just increase servings of protein shake. Down 2 more pounds today, drinking liquids and walking. I'm going to find different protein drinks and mix it up by adding protein powder. Last night I added strawberry powder to chocolate shake and it was tasty.

"take a number tiny tummy" lol

Yea I think we all know how that is! But so funny.

Nice losing 2lbs in a day! I'm only down 5 since surgery. Going slow but hoping it will pick up.

I'm still so tired and still taking naps, anyone else? Take a shower, rest, take a walk, rest, go to the store, nap... I accidentally mixed smoothie Protein powder with my Protein shake instead of whey protein powder. Bleh! I ended up with chocolate glop so I'll need to pay attention from now on.

I feel like I am healing but today I had to cough and wowser, it hurt. I'm sure I'm not alone in doing whatever I can to stiffle sneezes cause they hurt too. Some pain I cause myself when I start to gulp Water and it backs up right behund my sternum. Just more adventures with a sleeve.

Funny thing about weight loss, and I see it all over these forums but didn't think I would be guilty, using the word "only" when describing weight lost. I caught myself saying I only lost 2 pounds today. Really? No, hurray, 2 more pounds down should be my reaction. I need to not take this for granted because I've worked for this and need to keep working it to be successful. I never thought I'd get on a scale, lose weight, and not appreciate the achievement. From now on, every pound lost gets a farewell happy dance. Good-bye for good!

I have had similar reservations but it is wonderful reading your intermittent check-ins. The nitty-gritty of how you will feel post-surgery is something I have been curious about and think I needed to hear. Best of luck to you! And as you said---remember to celebrate those losses and remember it's not how fast you lose--it's that you lose and keep it off!