something that urks me

[betty_s 476]

So, while I was in one of my final appointments, a nutritional/behavioral seminar, a woman attending the session was getting a lap-band to sleeve revision. Her reasoning was because "her lap-band had failed her". Every time she was make a negative comment about the band, she would look at me and say "no offense".

I was also looking for lap-band instagram accounts and stumbled across an account where most of the hastags were #failedlapband and how their lap-band had failed them.

Now, I don't know these peoples' situations, and coming from someone who is 2 weeks pre-op, I'm by no means a pro. But isn't there a time where you need to take responsibility for your current situation? It doesn't make me regret choosing the lap-band, but, sometimes it makes me nervous that will I be one of those people where the lap-band didn't 'work'.

I have all the motivation in the world and want to fully commit myself to this band and this lifestyle, but seeing these stop and make me think. I feel like the band has such a negative appeal in the bariatric world.. or maybe its just me. I see plenty of people who are very successful with the band, so having that makes me feel better.

[enjoythetime 1,457]

betty_s

This frustrates the hell out of me too and not just when talking about the band but just lack of accountabilty in general!! At some point people have to take responsibility for THEIR OWN actions!! Now I'm not saying that every failure is related to their own doing, there are doctors out there in my opinion that shouldn't be performing this procedure or any other procedure for that matter. There are others that maybe had a "faulty" band, I mean it does happen, but the majority of what we're seeing is that people want that magic fix all, wake up one morning skinny pill, well hell don't we all, I mean really I would have signed up for that years ago. The fact is it's always easier to blame someone or something else when things get hard or are things we just don't want to do.

You're going to do great!! Like you said you have all the motivation in the world, hang on to that, because it will take you far! You have to drown out and distance yourself from the negativity, or that will drag you lower than anything else. The mind is a VERY powerful thing so if you feed it with positivity and nurture it the same way you do your body. Staying positive even when things aren't the greatest is what gets you to success!

[betty_s 476]

that statement. exactly.

you have def reassured me that this TOOL will help me achieve my goals. I hope that we can keep in touch throughout my journey and we can hang out in goal-land together!

betty_s

This frustrates the hell out of me too and not just when talking about the band but just lack of accountabilty in general!! At some point people have to take responsibility for THEIR OWN actions!! Now I'm not saying that every failure is related to their own doing, there are doctors out there in my opinion that shouldn't be performing this procedure or any other procedure for that matter. There are others that maybe had a "faulty" band, I mean it does happen, but the majority of what we're seeing is that people want that magic fix all, wake up one morning skinny pill, well hell don't we all, I mean really I would have signed up for that years ago. The fact is it's always easier to blame someone or something else when things get hard or are things we just don't want to do.

You're going to do great!! Like you said you have all the motivation in the world, hang on to that, because it will take you far! You have to drown out and distance yourself from the negativity, or that will drag you lower than anything else. The mind is a VERY powerful thing so if you feed it with positivity and nurture it the same way you do your body. Staying positive even when things aren't the greatest is what gets you to success!

[2muchfun 8,928]

Gastric Bypass and Sleeve have also "Failed" some people. Although it is much harder to fail with Bypass or sleeve since they're both restrictive surgeries. They physically restrict the amount of food they can consume. The band won't do this. The band simply dims our appetites and much is up to us to recognize the soft and hard signals.

The band has been sold for many years as a tool that is "restrictive" and will stop us from eating too much and once the pouch is full, we won't want to eat any longer. We now know this isn't true.

Patient selection is so important but there were a lot of surgeons jumping on the bandwagon who had no intuitive skills in recognizing that some people can't and never will control their eating habits unless they are forced to.

[Bandista 7,466]

I think that some people are just not ready to give up their addictions and/or disordered eating behaviors -- and of course it is possible to find a way around any weight loss surgery. The really wanting it to be a success is key. The band is designed to dim the appetite so we can make good decisions -- and it's amazing how easy that is once the appetite monster is shut down (shut up!). But still we have to do it. We can't say, "screw this, I'm going to drink milkshakes," etc. We have to want it. We have to choose ourselves and our healthy futures and that is an incredibly powerful thing. This is something I didn't know would be a side benefit to the weight loss, etc. -- the whole feeling of strength I feel now. It's so empowering! As some one said recently in another post, a big dose of brutal honesty goes a long way. I was very ready to be brutally honest with myself and therefor able to confront the self-sabotaging behaviors that were in my way and admit that I needed help with that. My help is in the form of a band, and I'm very grateful to have it.

[jennybean 175]

Maybe it just works better for some then it does for others? How can you judge until you have been there. I am disappointed so far and I have been trying hard. Some people lose oodles of weight on 1200-1500 calories. I maintain at that and need to go much lower more like 800-900 calories. I have always been like that all my life and it has been very frustrating. Everyone is different and has different problems.

[betty_s 476]

thanks tmf and bandista! I appreciate your thoughts on this matter.. I guess I haven't been surgery #failedsleeves and #failedgastricbypass , but i'm sure those are out there as well. my surgery is may 8th (!!!!!!!) and it has been a long insurance journey (since jan 2013) and I think waiting this long has really put me in the right mindset. i'm not scrounging for the last bites of ice cream, Cereal, or bread before I go on my pre-op diet Thursday, and I think that's how I really know that im ready.

I'm ready to do this. If I have to give up bread for the rest of my life, i'm willing to do that, because I want to be healthy and I want to be happy.

[betty_s 476]

like I said in the original post, I DONT know peoples situations and I am by no means judging, especially since I HAVE NOT had the surgery yet, I'm still 2 weeks from my date. I was simply stating that reading those topics, it can get discouraging coming from someone who is yet-to-be-banded.

Maybe it just works better for some then it does for others? How can you judge until you have been there. I am disappointed so far and I have been trying hard. Some people lose oodles of weight on 1200-1500 calories. I maintain at that and need to go much lower more like 800-900 calories. I have always been like that all my life and it has been very frustrating. Everyone is different and has different problems.

[Martha Howland-Shafiei 118]

thanks everyone: itoo have heard negatives on the banding but i am not going to let that stop me. i am having a bypass revision to the band May20 and i know i can do it.i lost 200 and gianed back 100 and i had no support so i know what to do now and i am motivated to use my tool to the best of my abiity.plenty of people have been very successful with the band and i want to be in that majority.Don'tlet anyone rain on ur parade.

[2muchfun 8,928]

Maybe it just works better for some then it does for others? How can you judge until you have been there. I am disappointed so far and I have been trying hard. Some people lose oodles of weight on 1200-1500 calories. I maintain at that and need to go much lower more like 800-900 calories. I have always been like that all my life and it has been very frustrating. Everyone is different and has different problems.

I don't think anyone would disagree with you and I certainly didn't mean for my post to indicate differently. There are so many reasons for failure or slow success. In your case, your doctor is taking his sweet time bringing you up to the green zone. Has he ever used a fluoroscopy for your fills? I would highly recommend this!

But, you won't lose much at 1500 calories/day. 1-2 lbs a month at most and looks like that's where you're at?

Don't give up and maybe you need to be more assertive with your surgeon? No need for you to be 7 months out and still struggling as you are. Keep in touch.

[jennybean 175]

like I said in the original post, I DONT know peoples situations and I am by no means judging, especially since I HAVE NOT had the surgery yet, I'm still 2 weeks from my date. I was simply stating that reading those topics, it can get discouraging coming from someone who is yet-to-be-banded.

Maybe it just works better for some then it does for others? How can you judge until you have been there. I am disappointed so far and I have been trying hard. Some people lose oodles of weight on 1200-1500 calories. I maintain at that and need to go much lower more like 800-900 calories. I have always been like that all my life and it has been very frustrating. Everyone is different and has different problems.

Sorry, I was not aiming that at you. Just people in general who the band works VERY well for have no idea what it is like when you are struggling and it is not working as well.

[2muchfun 8,928]

Sorry, I was not aiming that at you. Just people in general who the band works VERY well for have no idea what it is like when you are struggling and it is not working as well.

like I said in the original post, I DONT know peoples situations and I am by no means judging, especially since I HAVE NOT had the surgery yet, I'm still 2 weeks from my date. I was simply stating that reading those topics, it can get discouraging coming from someone who is yet-to-be-banded.

Maybe it just works better for some then it does for others? How can you judge until you have been there. I am disappointed so far and I have been trying hard. Some people lose oodles of weight on 1200-1500 calories. I maintain at that and need to go much lower more like 800-900 calories. I have always been like that all my life and it has been very frustrating. Everyone is different and has different problems.

I don't know your entire story but it sure looks like you're not getting the support and aftercare you need? Both are so important for a successful journey. And sometimes this is also the patients responsibility. Some patients don't communicate well with their doctors? Some never go back(big mistake). I hope you're one of those who walks in and insists on being successful? Don't give up!

[jennybean 175]

Maybe it just works better for some then it does for others? How can you judge until you have been there. I am disappointed so far and I have been trying hard. Some people lose oodles of weight on 1200-1500 calories. I maintain at that and need to go much lower more like 800-900 calories. I have always been like that all my life and it has been very frustrating. Everyone is different and has different problems.

I don't think anyone would disagree with you and I certainly didn't mean for my post to indicate differently. There are so many reasons for failure or slow success. In your case, your doctor is taking his sweet time bringing you up to the green zone. Has he ever used a fluoroscopy for your fills? I would highly recommend this!

But, you won't lose much at 1500 calories/day. 1-2 lbs a month at most and looks like that's where you're at?

Don't give up and maybe you need to be more assertive with your surgeon? No need for you to be 7 months out and still struggling as you are. Keep in touch.

I was not aiming that at you either You have been my biggest help on here btw. I eat about 1000-1200 calories at this point. I was maintaining at 1500. I need to be at around 800-900 calories to lose 1-2 pounds a week.

[enjoythetime 1,457]

I was not aiming that at you either You have been my biggest help on here btw. I eat about 1000-1200 calories at this point. I was maintaining at 1500. I need to be at around 800-900 calories to lose 1-2 pounds a week.

Jennybean,

The good news is it sounds like you know exactly where you need to be to lose and maintain which is HUGE!!!

It does sound like the after care youre recieving isn't as comprehensive as it should be.

Don't let up, be heard afterall this is your health and you have the right to voice your concerns to your Dr.

Best wishes on your continued success, you're doing great!!

[Mikee57 699]

some people no matter what they do in life will always be negative...I hope that lady's surgery works for her...but I know you have to be dedicated to the band for it to work...I just wasn't one that wanted my guts all cut up to stop me from eating so much. the band will work if we stick to our guns and follow the rules-I know you didn't want to judge her...but apparently she was judging you...you hang in there sweetie and you'll do just fine...I will be thinking about you betty_s!!! take care and will be looking forward to your future posts.