Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Are you open or private about surgery and why?



Recommended Posts

I have been very open about my surgery for many reasons but the main ones being that I hope to inspire others to do the surgery if they need it and I'm a terrible liar. I also get tons of support by being open about it. The people who were negative about the surgery in the beginning have changed their tune after seeing my success. In all honesty if you lose that much weight people are going to know you most likely did some type of surgery. By being honest I have squashed rumors caused by people trying to guess how and why the sudden weight loss.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sandi, I had similiar story as yours. I had a slight double stricture. Dealt with full liquids until about month 5. Now at 6 months I can finally eat. I finally feel like I can enjoy the journey now.

:)

Wow gome thanks or sharing thought I was alone in this regard I see folks at 3 weeks out eating chili and taco insides and get so jealous and sad

I can't wait for the day to eat!!! I miss sushi with a passion -- have u reached goal? I'm so close to goal I get nervous I will shrivel up

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wow gome thanks or sharing thought I was alone in this regard I see folks at 3 weeks out eating chili and taco insides and get so jealous and sad

I can't wait for the day to eat!!! I miss sushi with a passion -- have u reached goal? I'm so close to goal I get nervous I will shrivel up

That was me too. I'd look threw instagram pics and see what people were eating, just so I could see what others were having.

I am not at goal yet.. as of this morning I've lost 97, and have 29 more to go. I'm fairly close.

You're definitely not alone. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told my immediate family. But two of them have already told other people. I got so frustrated and mad when I found out. I mean, now people I don't even KNOW now know about my surgery. That is so weird to me. It's none of their damn business. And it's not my family's business to be telling other people. Maybe I'm the only one who feels this way, idk. Just wish I knew why it is so hard to keep it to themselves.

You are not the only one who feels like this! I feel the same way. It's my life, my body and my story to share! My mother has been telling her hair dresser, her coworkers,etc. Everyone just needs something new to gossip about.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You are not the only one who feels like this! I feel the same way. It's my life, my body and my story to share! My mother has been telling her hair dresser, her coworkers,etc. Everyone just needs something new to gossip about.

Heaven for if you have kids, LOL!! I'm lucky to have a partner and NO close family. My mother would have been all up in my space!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told my husband and my 3 adult children. I did not tell my parents as I knew my mother would be very opinionated. I also knew that would open up a huge risk if extended family members knowing. It is hard. At the same surgery I also had a hernia repaired so 2 weeks post op, I tell them I am still recovering from this hernia repair. Actually since my dad is also stage 4 lung cancer , I did not even tell them I was going in at all for anything initially. Only when I came home did they fi doubt I had been in the hospital. One of my daughters, who is 23, senior in college, asked me if this was not a little too drastic. The easy way out ?! So, I shut down on talking at all to her about this anymore. I need support and not opinions and judgements !

That's terrible! I hope u do have supportive people in your life. I was worried about my mom so I didn't tell her until after I went down to Mexico to have surgery and came back. It actually turned out great. My mom is so supportive and encouraging, I'm so glad I have her! It was a little rocky at first, she didn't understand my decision but now she is happy for me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I tell anyone who asks how I lost the weight. Mostly because I like to see the look on their face...I don't give 2 Sh#$s what people think. But that's just me...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have only told my husband, close family and co-workers. I may tell others or make some grand Facebook announcement one day but for now, I just want to take this journey in peace. I have some extended family and friends that are fitness freaks (even trainers) and while I intend on one day being one as well, I do not welcome their certain criticism that I chose surgery to deal with my weight. I feel the same as others on here in that, they have not walked a mile in my rather stretched out skin and do not know what my personal demons are and have been. So until some "Ghost" type stuff starts going on and they have lived some time as me, they have no right to judge the choice I have made. Again, I may change my mind in the future and decide to shout it from the mountain tops, but for now, I choose to keep it quite and only share with those I know are supportive. I didn't even tell my best friend until a day or two before surgery because I knew she would not be supportive about the decision. And, she actually REALLY hurt my feelings and our friendship may be over due to some of her negative comments. So, if you know some people won't be receptive/supportive, don't tell them at all or at least until you are ready to. This is not an easy road and we need encouragement and NOT discouragement! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have been very open about my surgery for many reasons but the main ones being that I hope to inspire others to do the surgery if they need it and I'm a terrible liar. I also get tons of support by being open about it. The people who were negative about the surgery in the beginning have changed their tune after seeing my success. In all honesty if you lose that much weight people are going to know you most likely did some type of surgery. By being honest I have squashed rumors caused by people trying to guess how and why the sudden weight loss.

I love your answer! That's how I look at it!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A few months ago I told some close friends. My family knew I was considering it from the beginning. I don't make it a big deal, I just tell them it's a medical procedure to help me help myself avoid health problems and so I can get in better shape. No big, nothing to see here, move along... some casual acquaintances know I will need to have a surgical procedure soon and my recovery time means I will miss some work. I keep it light and matter of fact and so I haven't gotten any major reactions. I do get some positive feedback when they know someone who had same surgery and they can tell me it really works. Are there some who may comment behind my back that it isn't necessary, or I should try... (fill in the blank) or that I'm taking the "easy" way? Maybe, but I don't really care. They are probably the same ones who will talk about me no matter what I do. I'm focused on me and my life and my family is encouraging and I'm counting down to surgery and the day I can start getting rid of some of these clothes when they get too big!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi

So I'm one year and eight months post op and I can honestly agree with some of you !! I was originally on the it's no bodies business camp as well but listen girl either people are going to have an opinion and they will speculate what ever they want . I truthfully can say I weighted a whole year until I no longer cared what anyone will say , I mean I told all my friends , family and anyone who asked me if I did surgery but if they just asked how I lost the weight I'd say Protein and eating small portions as you've stated ... The half truth ; now I'll tell anyone who wants to know , it's on my face book , my Instagram and I'm even starting a campaign .... Tell the world and when you get feed back whether it's good or bad remember why you had the surgery in the first place and let that be all that matters .... Your story will inspire some one , and that's worth more than the negative feed back we are all so afraid of ... Also never be ashamed of something you did to better your self as long as you didn't hurt anyone to get it " Screw them with a smile"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am honest about the WLS, but I kept my decision very quiet until two weeks pre-op, and then only telling my mother and sisters. My hubby was only told 1 month pre-op also. ( I had my date scheduled for 4 months - the wait was my choice).

While I haven't made a Facebook announcement, I answer questions about my weight loss honestly. I find it easier to dazzle with facts than be vague and provide gossip ammunition. The upside for me has been the fact that I've been able to have open discussions with others who are considering WLS for themselves or family members who are having it. I consider this my " pay it forward" opportunity. This is truly a personal decision to tell / not tell.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Before my surgery (3/27), I only told my two best friends, my husband and two children. My parents live 1000 miles away and when I told my mom it was something I was considering, she didn't think it was the best idea. So, I decided not to tell her and the next time I see her, I will surprise her! I ended up telling my mother in law who was helping out some with my kids. But tonight, toe weeks out, we are having a big family get together and I'm nervous about telling them... I guess I will see how it goes and decide on the spot whether or not to tell the,.... Of course I will be eating my Taco Bell pintos n cheese instead of the pizza and cake, so I may just have to say something,

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

<p>I have only told my husband, close family and co-workers. I may tell others or make some grand Facebook announcement one day but for now, I just want to take this journey in peace. I have some extended family and friends that are fitness freaks (even trainers) and while I intend on one day being one as well, I do not welcome their certain criticism that I chose surgery to deal with my weight. I feel the same as others on here in that, they have not walked a mile in my rather stretched out skin and do not know what my personal demons are and have been. So until some "Ghost" type stuff starts going on and they have lived some time as me, they have no right to judge the choice I have made. Again, I may change my mind in the future and decide to shout it from the mountain tops, but for now, I choose to keep it quite and only share with those I know are supportive. I didn't even tell my best friend until a day or two before surgery because I knew she would not be supportive about the decision. And, she actually REALLY hurt my feelings and our friendship may be over due to some of her negative comments. So, if you know some people won't be receptive/supportive, don't tell them at all or at least until you are ready to. This is not an easy road and we need encouragement and NOT discouragement! :)</p>

I can ditto Your story I lost a friend who I had for 7-8 years because her being use to being the smaller FAT girl but once I lost the weight it's was all sorts of things being said like " Oh you think your smaller than everyone " and than her posting stuff on face book saying how she's tired of people saying they lost the weight this and the way but how they took the easy way out and she don't agree with it; she even went so far to say " I have a friend who's had a WLS and I don't agree with their decision , how she feels it could have been worked off" lol well yup it all balled down to jealousy and her not being ready to support me like she said she would before I got the surgery... It's funny how people are willing to support you until they feel threatened by your success!! Blah blah she was not my real friend at the end of the day

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm not sure my friends agree with my decision but none of them know anything about this surgery and I've done loads of research, frequent this site, and understand the benefits for my life. Even if they talk about me, I don't care, since they could already be talking about my weight, my ass the size of Dallas or crazy hair. People talk, it's just the way things are, and they don't have to agree with me. I'll just work hard at this "easy way out" and let the results speak for me!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • summerset

      Going in on Tuesday. Things are arranged (need to order a cab to the station because it's too early for a bus going there) and I'm getting more nervous by the hour.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Debbie Nichols

      No plans for surgery 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • amazingmimi

      I feel like I've finally gotten past the biggest hurdle. Surgery date is September 6th, the day after Labor Day, and yesterday I got my insurance approval letter. I've followed everything they've told me to do, and I've even lost 30 lbs on my own since hubby had to change his diet for diabetes. No worries now about having to do 4 weeks of the liver shrinking diet instead of 2. On my initial visit, if I had gained just 5lbs I would have had to do 4 weeks. It's getting closer. Just 2 more months to wait.
      · 1 reply
      1. NmMd

        Although the prep work took energy, I found the biggest hurdle was post-operative. The first 48 hrs were extremely uncomfortable. I did an overnight and trying to down the liquids, Tylenol, and especially the barium was rough. Thankfully though, I got away with only having to have 1 belly injection after surgery. Needless are not my thing.

    • Grace1234

      I am brand new to this my surgery is tentative for July 27 depending on insurance and I'll be have the Gastric Sleeve.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Pepper1

      I am looking for people to connect with that are 4-5 years out. Many of the support sights I go to are all newbies. And while I enjoyed that when i first had my surgery and found it useful, I am looking to exchange ideas with folks that are out a few years. I am slowly gaining weight back and losing my excitement. I don't want that!
      · 1 reply
      1. SleeverSk

        Maybe post in the forums. It's a more active areaI have noticed no one replies to status updates

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×