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I am such a failure!



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I was such a high risk that some times makes me think I made the wrong choice in having this surgery. I have no excuses why it has not worked for me. I have asked my self if I had to do it all over again would I? My answer is always yes. Since I had the surgery I have had one set back after another. It seems to be that I am a freak. if there is a one percent of some thing happening I am that one percent. After a slow and steady weight lost until after my year mark. I started to gain weight and now I am sad and upset with myself. I look at everything I am doing to see what I am doing wrong and still no answer, I go to the doctor and the Physiotherapist and still no answer but a lot of blame that I am not doing the right things. getBut how you want me to exercise more, cut out all sweets, drink more Water, and see a therapist well I am doing all this things, but no change. I just cry and feel bad I really want to lose at least a 100 lbs. I am a freak and failure why can I do it like so many others before me.

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What are you eating? How often? How much are you walking everyday?

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Are you on a lot of different meds? Certain meds can surely sabotage your weight loss and actually make you gain weight. If so, ask you doctor whether your meds or the combinations can be affecting your weight loss.

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I am sorry Lilu. Please don't beat yourself up. It will only make your journey that much harder. The bible teaches us to be content in whatever state we are in. That doesn't mean that we are happy or satisfied with our current situation, but rather to find joy and peace in every situation. Focus on all the things that are beautiful about you and your life. Then start working on the things you want to change -- one task at a time. We've all been where you are. You can do this. We believe in you.

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I am a firm believer that what we are eating is 80% and exercise only 20%. Focus on the basics, track what you are eating everyday and everything. I use my fitness pal but you use whatever you like best. Don't fudge what you are eating because you are only lying to yourself. See if you are getting enough Protein, or too many carbs. You can do this, little steps start right now tracking your food. Good luck. Keep coming back here for support.

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I believe in My Fitness Pal too. It keeps me honest and helps me decide if I really need to eat an extra snack. I've seen days that I nearly hit 1000 calories, and it frustrates me, but it makes me work that much harder to stay under 800 cal./day. I am under 700 cal. 90% of the time. I know that thanks to MFP.

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I am trying to get in my Proteins, because of food allergies I can not eat fruits or vegetables. No seafood of fish. I eat three times a day. I follow the nutritionist diet planned. I walk 10 blocks going and 10 blocks returning back home every day and twice a day. This how allowed me to maintain myself from gain more.

What are you eating? How often? How much are you walking e.veryday?

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Yes you are right that is why I have never stop keeping a food log. Light I said before I have no excuses

I am a firm believer that what we are eating is 80% and exercise only 20%. Focus on the basics, track what you are eating everyday and everything. I use my fitness pal but you use whatever you like best. Don't fudge what you are eating because you are only lying to yourself. See if you are getting enough Protein, or too many carbs. You can do this, little steps start right now tracking your food. Good luck. Keep coming back here for support.

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Overall I want to thank you for your support. Yes I am taking alot of meds. And the doctors know but they all act that it is me. That isvwhy I have been feeling like such a failure. The new issue is the dietian who states that I need to eat 1500 calories. I can't even eat my menu. what to do

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    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 1 reply
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

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