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Has anyone else gotten terribly depressed after losing weight? I'm so upset that I'm not a BBW anymore. I feel terrible. Almost suicidal. I feel guilty everytime I go on the scale and see weightloss. I hate it. I don't want to lose anymore! I'm so ugly. I can't keep a pair of pants long enough. I'm happy that my acid reflux is gone, but I hate all this! I don't want to be sad.

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Yes this sounds very similar to me. I was very attached to being a big girl, a bbw. It was really hard for me to let that go. Often in the beginning after surgery I would see a woman bigger then me and always feel wistful. I'm not sure how to really explain it to most people because 99 percent of the people I've told these things to do not understand where I'm coming from AT ALL and think I'm quite strange for it. It's not even just that I miss eating and food, but actually miss being bigger in a lot of ways. It's still something I'm working on dealing with. Because of this I stopped losing weight for a while- though still needed to and need to lose more for my health- but yea I understand this ever well. If you ever want to chat shoot me a PM!

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Please go see a doctor right away and tell him what you told us.

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I'm going to get a hold of a psychiatrist on Monday. I just wanted to know if I was the only one. I feel very alone right now regarding this.

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You are far from being alone, Jouselle. This is a man problem, too. Many men feel an advantage with a large body even if it is obese and unhealthy. Their size gives them an intimidation factor, at least in their mind.

We all learn to cope with our circumstances by accommodating ourselves to them. When change comes, especially the fast change that comes after this operation we must change our self perception and go against what we were once somewhat comfortable with.

You are more than your body, whether it is heavy or slim. You have a personality and a mind. Making your body healthy is what you need so your personality can freely express itself. You are on that road.

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I agree with gmanbat...go talk to someone.

Sending you best wishes!

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OMG another blogger! *pounces on a new blog to read!*

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No expert here by any means. Please get help soon! Body dysmophic syndromes mean we don't always have a good reality of what our bodies really look like. Much like the anorexic, I think it affects us similarly. I love my curves. I hope they never go away. But my HEALTH is suffering and that's a reality. Focus on the unwritten chapters and where your body will take you! Get a massage, a haircut, some new makeup, try a new exercise regime or yoga. Love your skin you are in! I am sending prayers for peace of mind and comfort.

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Has anyone else gotten terribly depressed after losing weight? I'm so upset that I'm not a BBW anymore. I feel terrible. Almost suicidal. I feel guilty everytime I go on the scale and see weightloss. I hate it. I don't want to lose anymore! I'm so ugly. I can't keep a pair of pants long enough. I'm happy that my acid reflux is gone, but I hate all this! I don't want to be sad.

Jouselle, there is a time in our lives we have to reach out for professional help with depression. I have had serious issues with depression losing my son, so I sought the help and I thank God that I did. You have taken the steps for your health, and I will pray that you will seek out a mental health professional as soon as possible. You should read your post to them so they will put you on a priority list. My wish is for you to be as happy as you wanted to be when you started your weight loss journey, and you can do it! Bless you friend. Linda

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You guys are so very kind. Thank you!

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I read your blog and I loved it. I need to figure that out for myself but hmmmm I might be too old!

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We used to buy our Vitamins and calcium chews from Celebrate all the time. They are a great company, the fastest shipping I've ever seen if you order over 100. at a time and get express for free. We just ran out out cash and have to get cheaper stuff now. When our ship comes back in we will be on board again. :D

Edited by gmanbat

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Linda, it's not too late. My Mom has decided to get the sleeve now too, after seeing my husband's joint pain go away, and my acid reflux go away. She suffers from both right now, but that's going to change.

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the head F stage!

for alot of us being big- really big- was a whole life thing it was for me from about 6 years old just steadily gained weight no amount of diets help i was even admitted to a childrens ward for 3 months on a strict diet to lose weight- i didn;t.

had 3 years of constant diet checks twice a week and nadda.

so whole life never been small at any point then suddeny i am getitng smaller WTF!

you dont know you as smaller, you don;t know the life smaller you will have- how you will be, look, feel, how people will treat you etc so its a total mind F.

seeing your body smaller is enough on its own to send you in that oh my god frame of mind but just as you get used to that size oh look i am smaller again lost more weight and it all starts again.

it is so much to deal with on top of the standard working out eating working out getting meds in this on top is like mental and emotional overload, your brain and senses just can;t take it all in and porcess it fast enough.

you are always beind for the longest time trying to catchup mentally to how you are physclly as time goes on and the weightloss slows down you do begin to catch up its not as fast and drastic so you have time to process it all and when you do lose weight you look all over you to wonder where but in a good way not a shock hit you in the face way.

if you need ot talk to someone- and so many of us do!- then seek advice and talk it all out.

for me i was scared deeply scared of what life would become thats my fear that i had to deal with and i did thankfully!

but we ARE allowed to feel these things its a major major shock to the system its frigging hard work to go through daily and we all have to porcess and deal with whats happening in our own way even if its to cry and be mad and voice regrets that maybe it wasn;t such a good idea.

maybe it would help you to keep a little notebook and write it all down at the time no one has to read it, it migt just help to get whats whizzing around in your head out even to just yourself.

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<p>Has anyone else gotten terribly depressed after losing weight? I'm so upset that I'm not a BBW anymore. I feel terrible. Almost suicidal. I feel guilty everytime I go on the scale and see weightloss. I hate it. I don't want to lose anymore! I'm so ugly. I can't keep a pair of pants long enough. I'm happy that my acid reflux is gone, but I hate all this! I don't want to be sad.</p>

You don't have to answer this question but were you sexually abused as a child?

Please get some help, you should t have to feel bad about losing weight! Why do you feel guilty? Do you have over weight friends that you feel you are leaving behind?

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    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 1 reply
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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