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The Food Police Were Out In Full Force Yesterday!



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Things I heard yesterday. ..

-is it ok for you to eat that?

-oh.. none of that for you!

-I thought you couldn't eat that?

-nope.. not for you!

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

So in the middle of dinner I stood up and said, 'Listen, I do not need any of you to police what I'm eating. You need to pass everthing to me like you always have and I am perfectly capable of choosing for myself whether or not I can or can't eat it. It's my choice! And if there is one more comment I am leaving'!.

Well, everyone was a little shocked but the comments stopped and I was able to really enjoy the rest of the evening without feeling like I was under a microscope. Geesh!

Nothing and I mean NOTHING annoys me more than the food police. The other day I literally said to someone "I've lost 70 pounds in 9 weeks eating what I like and without your advice, I don't need your input. Thanks' and shut them up real quick.

I could not agree more! It not only annoys me but truly pisses me off. Honestly, does it help to "educate" people on their choices? No, it doesn't. People will make changes when and if they are ready. No amount of food bible preaching will change that. Sometimes, it can make things worse. You can't say something about what they are eating without effecting their emotions. You could be the trigger that makes them binge because you have just made them feel like shit.

My brother had a lap band about 5 years ago. Every time our family gets together my sister and I are usually the planners. It's always at her house because I live out of state and we fight about this every time. She insists that no Desserts other than fruit be served. She insists that there can be no pizza or anything fried, nothing except healthy food because "she doesn't want to tempt him." I tell her every time that he will be responsible for his own choices and that he is well qualified to make them. We don't need to be his food police and in fact, he HATES it when she does that. He has told me a million times. He has told her a million times.

it's the same for anything else, smoking, drinking, religion and lifestyle. Unless you live under a rock, most people have a good idea of the caloric and nutrition values. They have an idea of the hazards of smoking, they have an idea how they feel about Jesus….I think it is insulting to their intelligence to preach at them as if they don't know.

For those of us who have been "reformed," we did it when we were good and ready and not a minute before. No amount of policing or preaching likely factored much into that decision.

Don't become "that" reformed zealot person.

It's never pretty.

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Nothing and I mean NOTHING annoys me more than the food police. The other day I literally said to someone "I've lost 70 pounds in 9 weeks eating what I like and without your advice, I don't need your input. Thanks' and shut them up real quick.</blockquote> I could not agree more! It not only annoys me but truly pisses me off. Honestly, does it help to "educate" people on their choices? No, it doesn't. People will make changes when and if they are ready. No amount of food bible preaching will change that. Sometimes, it can make things worse. You can't say something about what they are eating without effecting their emotions. You could be the trigger that makes them binge because you have just made them feel like ****. My brother had a lap band about 5 years ago. Every time our family gets together my sister and I are usually the planners. It's always at her house because I live out of state and we fight about this every time. She insists that no Desserts other than fruit be served. She insists that there can be no pizza or anything fried, nothing except healthy food because "she doesn't want to tempt him." I tell her every time that he will be responsible for his own choices and that he is well qualified to make them. We don't need to be his food police and in fact, he HATES it when she does that. He has told me a million times. He has told her a million times. it's the same for anything else, smoking, drinking, religion and lifestyle. Unless you live under a rock, most people have a good idea of the caloric and nutrition values. They have an idea of the hazards of smoking, they have an idea how they feel about Jesus….I think it is insulting to their intelligence to preach at them as if they don't know. For those of us who have been "reformed," we did it when we were good and ready and not a minute before. No amount of policing or preaching likely factored much into that decision. Don't become "that" reformed zealot person. It's never pretty.

Very true. So I zip it!!! LOL

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I've had to do the other way around--tell people not to think they should be eating like me. I'm mean, I have a tiny tummy. If my coworkers ate like I did, they'd be miserable. And I know how hard it is to eat normally when someone around you is "on a diet" or "being good". Maybe this is a bigger issue for women, but I don't want them to think they can't eat carbs or have desert because I choose not to. I urge them to ignore me and eat whatever they choose.

The only time it gets to me? Is all those crap recipes my friends post on Facebook. I really want to tell them that is not real food when you start with two boxes and add three cans to it, even if you did bake it. I see those horrible, horrible, sugar and fat and chemical laden deserts being posted and just want to explain about REAL food. Thankfully I don't. But I sure am tempted! And was before the sleeve too actually so that still hasn't changed :)

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Things I heard yesterday. .. -is it ok for you to eat that? -oh.. none of that for you! -I thought you couldn't eat that? -nope.. not for you! ARE YOU KIDDING ME? So in the middle of dinner I stood up and said, 'Listen, I do not need any of you to police what I'm eating. You need to pass everthing to me like you always have and I am perfectly capable of choosing for myself whether or not I can or can't eat it. It's my choice! And if there is one more comment I am leaving'!. Well, everyone was a little shocked but the comments stopped and I was able to really enjoy the rest of the evening without feeling like I was under a microscope. Geesh!

I have had to regulate my mom a few times. It is annoying.

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Since I was doing most of the cooking.....there was no one to tell me anything. I must admit, I'm more guilty of being the food police these days to others. When I see someone eating way too much of the nasty unhealthy food they shovel in their mouths....it's all I can do not to tell them how many calories they're eating. I have to bite my tongue because I don't want to be that person.

I know. Isn't it funny how much other people eat. I am so aware now that I am not fighting them for whatever is on the table! :)

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I may be misunderstanding but I find it interesting that many of you (I think :) ) are assuming I started this thread because I was eating crap. Interesting. .. actually I ate one slice of Turkey, about a tbls each of stuffing and mashed potatoes and a few green beens. I was really good and still got all the comments and scrutiny. Oh yeah... I did have a little piece of dark chocolate too. So what? I'm a big girl, aren't I? I only got fed up and said something because this has been going on for weeks and I was sick of it. I tried talking to my family about it nicely and it didn't work, so BAM! now they get it. I don't mind honest curiosity and questions about my diet but I don't need to be policed.

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Eh, I had to have this same talk with my kids. On the first leg of our car trip we stopped for dinner and I ordered chili and a baked potato. After I sat through their chorus of "Are you allowed to eat that?" I finally took them aside (we were traveling with other relatives) and said, "Hey, can it. I have this under control and while I appreciate your concern I would not do anything to hurt myself.) In the meantime my aunt (one of the other relatives) was freaking out over how little I ordered and then finished.

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Eh, I had to have this same talk with my kids. On the first leg of our car trip we stopped for dinner and I ordered chili and a baked potato. After I sat through their chorus of "Are you allowed to eat that?" I finally took them aside (we were traveling with other relatives) and said, "Hey, can it. I have this under control and while I appreciate your concern I would not do anything to hurt myself.) In the meantime my aunt (one of the other relatives) was freaking out over how little I ordered and then finished.

Seriously! !! Hope it works.. I tried that but it was the threat of walking out a thanksgiving that finally did it

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I may be misunderstanding but I find it interesting that many of you (I think :) ) are assuming I started this thread because I was eating crap. Interesting. .. actually I ate one slice of Turkey, about a tbls each of stuffing and mashed potatoes and a few green beens. I was really good and still got all the comments and scrutiny. Oh yeah... I did have a little piece of dark chocolate too. So what? I'm a big girl, aren't I? I only got fed up and said something because this has been going on for weeks and I was sick of it. I tried talking to my family about it nicely and it didn't work, so BAM! now they get it. I don't mind honest curiosity and questions about my diet but I don't need to be policed.

Oh I don't think we are assuming that. The thread just took off in a different direction. All the comments about the crap we see people eating weren't about you at all :)

Many of us get easily distracted and one topic leads to another and before you know it, so domes posting pictures of food porn :P

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Oh I don't think we are assuming that. The thread just took off in a different direction. All the comments about the crap we see people eating weren't about you at all :) Many of us get easily distracted and one topic leads to another and before you know it, someone's posting pictures of food porn :P

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Oh I don't think we are assuming that. The thread just took off in a different direction. All the comments about the crap we see people eating weren't about you at all :)

Many of us get easily distracted and one topic leads to another and before you know it, so domes posting pictures of food porn :P

Haha... how true! And while I was good I do love me some food porn :)

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I may be misunderstanding but I find it interesting that many of you (I think :) ) are assuming I started this thread because I was eating crap.....

I didn't read that in anyone's post. I think we've all been right where you're at.....having other people try to question our food choices. And I and others mentioned that we also have an urge to question the food choices of those around us....mostly I think we were referring to the non-sleeved people in our lives who eat like they will never see food again.

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I didn't read that in anyone's post. I think we've all been right where you're at.....having other people try to question our food choices. And I and others mentioned that we also have an urge to question the food choices of those around us....mostly I think we were referring to the non-sleeved people in our lives who eat like they will never see food again.

I used to be that person... now I just could care less about all the food. I sat there amidst all the Desserts and felt like I was going into a diabetic coma just looking at it. And while I got questioned about my tbls of stuffing they were stuffing there faces like it may be their last meal. I find it interesting that in such a short amount of time my relationship with food has changed so much.

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I may be misunderstanding but I find it interesting that many of you (I think :) ) are assuming I started this thread because I was eating crap. Interesting. .. actually I ate one slice of Turkey, about a tbls each of stuffing and mashed potatoes and a few green beens. I was really good and still got all the comments and scrutiny. Oh yeah... I did have a little piece of dark chocolate too. So what? I'm a big girl, aren't I? I only got fed up and said something because this has been going on for weeks and I was sick of it. I tried talking to my family about it nicely and it didn't work, so BAM! now they get it. I don't mind honest curiosity and questions about my diet but I don't need to be policed.

I did not assume you were eating crap. I totally understand the food (and everything else) police. People just think they are the masters of everything. The sister that I talked about is the one who has smoked for over 40 years. She is so judgmental of food but will go ballistic if someone questioned her smoking.

I just think we need to make sure our own houses are perfectly clean before we even venture into someone else's.

I believe this in all parts of our lives.

Not just food.

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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