Now that I have your attention, that was "0's", not "O's". "0's" like in "Zeros".

My wife, Tina was fine when she hit the big 2 0

a little skittish for the big 3 0

very quiet for the big 4 0

in denial about the big 5 0

and terribly depressed about the big 6 0

which she will hit on the last day of the month.

Tina says that she doesn't want any birthday presents, no party, no celebration, no dinner out and that we should pretend that she is not having a birthday at all.

None of the big 0's ever bothered me (except the big 3 0 and that was so mild as to be almost non-existent), so I really can not comprehend what she is going through or how to help her. The funny part about it is that I will be 62, 17 days later, but I look like 10 years older than her. When we go somewhere that gives senior citizen discounts (55 for the movies, some fast food beverages), they ask her for ID unless I order for both of us. She has about as much chance of getting a senior citizen discount when alone (without showing ID) as our 14 year old grandson has of buying cigarettes or liquor.

None the less, she still is in a funk about turning 60. Does anyone, particularly you women out there, have any suggestions? Before you answer, neither diamonds or cars will suffice as an answer. This is about depression; hers, not driving me to the brink of financial depression.

A gettaway is just what I was thinking.....take the grandchild for a trip if it's the way to perk her up. But while the grandchild sleeps, be sure to spice things up a bit with romance.....flowers, candles, soft music or poetry....not necessarily intercourse. Just plain ol' intamacy. Take a photo book along if possible. With pictures from the time you two met until now. The happier moments of course. Anything to make her laugh, smile and reflect on how lucky she is.

After being away from me for two weeks, I am sure that intercourse will be as spicy for her as it would be more me.

Brooklyn (our grandchild) never sleeps, except at night and even then she is always a threat to come knocking at the door.

Your Tina is starting to remind me of my mum, another Brit. My mum had a difficult time spending money on personal pleasures. This was in sharp contrast to her sister who spent her way through her share of their inheritance within a couple of decades and ended up on welfare. Of my two parents my father was more comfortable spending money; my mother became very chary of her money after my father died even though we kids were always after her to loosen up and enjoy herself a little more. In fact spending money was not enjoyable to my mother.

When she died she left my brother and I quite a nice bunch of change. It was enough for me to take early retirement and it bought me this lapband and my now thinner body.

I hope Tina gets back in time for her birthday and that you make her a terrifically happy woman on that day. I am sure you will.

Tina doesn't mind spending money on Brooklyn. In every store we go to, I hear, "This would nice for brooklyn". She just doesn't want it spent on Tina.

So I might try to include Brooklyn into my birthday plans for Tina as Hopeagain 2007 suggested.

Maybe we can go for a ride on Allie:

I have been so lonely without my Tina that I went out to a bar last night, got drunk and brought two girls home.

They would not leave until I bought them Breakfast.

I have been so lonely without my Tina that I went out to a bar last night, got drunk and brought two girls home.

They would not leave until I bought them breakfast.

Oh the depravity of it all! I guess I'll have to temporarily remove you from my heroes list!

Is that the lovely Brooklyn and her sister?

Jo Ann

Oh the depravity of it all! I guess I'll have to temporarily remove you from my heroes list!

Is that the lovely Brooklyn and her sister?

Jo Ann

They call themselves sisters, but it is Brooklyn on the right and her (BFF) Kindergarten classmate Amalia. They spent the night at my son's home and because my son & daughter-in-law had to go out early, I took over the babysitting chores. And of course, it was lunch.

They call themselves sisters, but it is Brooklyn on the right and her (BFF) Kindergarten classmate Amalia. They spent the night at my son's home and because my son & daughter-in-law had to go out early, I took over the babysitting chores. And of course, it was lunch.

OK, you are back on my heroes list! :clap2: Aren't BFF's great?

I needed to boast to enhance my macho male image.:eek:

TOM, another idea for her birthday would be to get some nice candles, and a good smelling lotion or massage oil and give her a nice back massage or foot rub.

Another thing too is to get her a birthday card that says something to the effect of "Happy 47th Birthday"

One year my mom decided she was 35. She's gone up from that, but working for her and having taken copies of her driver's license and things, she's 6 or 7 years older than anyone thinks she is. :welldoneclap:

Regarding tension and whatnot, sometimes a good cry is all a girl needs. There's nothing to *do* about whatever it is, but it's bothering you and the emotions fill up and just need a way out.

Now I have a big decision to make:

In another thread (in the Raves and Rants section) I mentioned that I had not been around LBT for a few days because of medical tests regarding dizziness and loss of balance. I mentioned that I had to have an MRI of my brain after a CT-Scan, blood tests, hearing tests, inner ear tests, etc. did not get anywhere solving my problems.

Today, I went to the doctor and got the results of the latest bloodworm and the Brain MRI. I was sure that they would not find anything in the Brain MRI, because my head is hollow, however they found something and stupid me did not have the doctor write it down so I could do some research. All I can remember is it is a long word beginning with "D" and it sounds like dementia with a “asy” at the end, whatever, but when I asked the doctor what it means he said it could be "Muscular Sclerosis". I told Tina that I would call her after I got out of the doctor's office, but when I did, I did not tell her about the possible MS situation. She has enough to worry about up there in Brooklyn regarding her mother, without me loading more things on to her. And besides, what can she do besides worry about it?

My doctor's office called a neurologist's office for an appointment which usually takes 2 to 3 weeks to get, but the neurologist had just had a cancellation for next Monday morning, so here is my problem, if it is MS, do I hold off telling her until I pick her up on Tuesday from the airport or do I wait until after her Birthday?

WOW TOM---hoping some of our medical minded friends pop in here with some idea of what the elusive diagnosis might be---.

Whatever you find out, my advice would be tell her when she gets home. Let her get home safe, but to hell with the birthday, she is not in a birthday party frame of mind anyway, and I would resent having life changing news withheld from me. She is likely to feel guilty for not being there when you got the news anyway---so I wouldn't hold it back from her. Does she know you went to the Dr. for the test? If she asks---what are you going to say?

Whatever is going on, you will need each other---no reason to deny yourself the comfort you know she can provide you with. Any more than you would want to be denied being able to comfort her.

MS is not good----but it is not the worst diagnosis you could get either. Have you tried researching it, and seeing if you see the word? Or can you call the Dr. and ask? No sense in wondering and worrying if you can begin to research.

((((hugs)))) We will be here pulling for good news.

Kat

I did some research. The word was Demyelination.

And that research told you what else?

WOW TOM---hoping some of our medical minded friends pop in here with some idea of what the elusive diagnosis might be---.

Whatever you find out, my advice would be tell her when she gets home. Let her get home safe, but to hell with the birthday, she is not in a birthday party frame of mind anyway, and I would resent having life changing news withheld from me. She is likely to feel guilty for not being there when you got the news anyway---so I wouldn't hold it back from her. Does she know you went to the Dr. for the test? If she asks---what are you going to say?

Whatever is going on, you will need each other---no reason to deny yourself the comfort you know she can provide you with. Any more than you would want to be denied being able to comfort her.

MS is not good----but it is not the worst diagnosis you could get either. Have you tried researching it, and seeing if you see the word? Or can you call the Dr. and ask? No sense in wondering and worrying if you can begin to research.

((((hugs)))) We will be here pulling for good news.

Kat

Thanks for the advice. I have a lot of soul searching to do and all the advice comes in handy.

I have to babysit for Brooklyn this weekend, so I will not have time to worry about Mondays neurologist appointment.

Some year: Three deaths in the family, Tina's mother's problems and now this.

One of the symptoms of MS is depression. I wonder why?

I have a SIL and a very good friend both my age (46), and a 1st cousin who is 38, all with MS. They all take a different form of interferon (sp?) in injection form, and are pretty much symptom free. My cousin has a 2 year old, and she tires pretty easy--but that happens with a 2 year old around MS or not!

I will keep you in my prayers---that whatever this is, it is something simple.

Kat

And that research told you what else?

Demyelination is the equivalent of the insulation on electrical wiring breaking down, except in this case it is the breaking down of the myelin layer or sheathing (covering) of the of the nerves. It would be like having hundred of wires running in a bundle and the insulation between the wires breaking down causing short circuits between the wires, but in this case the wires are in my brain.

Sounds very much like the description I was given when my SIL was diagnosed (I was with her at the Dr.). Is there a cause---a reason the "coating" is wearing off? Does the research say what the treatment is? How fast it progresses? Is there a certain area of the brain it tends to do this in?

Sorry for all the questions---

Kat