Call me <evil> but...

[Madam Reverie 2,958]

Gotta love this thread. Well anyway getting back to in laws. My sister in law when she saw me recently after a 70+ pound weight loss said I look like I finally "go" with my husband (a little background my husband has a 32 inch waist and still weighs what he did in college.). Hows that for a back handed compliment!

WHAT?! Id've not responded to THAT very well...

[ReDbEaN 654]

Gotta love this thread. Well anyway getting back to in laws. My sister in law when she saw me recently after a 70+ pound weight loss said I look like I finally "go" with my husband (a little background my husband has a 32 inch waist and still weighs what he did in college.). Hows that for a back handed compliment!

WOW!! Please tell me you responded!!!

[scarlet333 386]

I totally ignored it. I know I can be such a wimp sometimes but I have locked horns with this lady a few times in the past and it never ends well. It is my brothers wife and he is such a good guy and I know I would be hurting him more than his wife if I got into a war of words with her. I comfort myself with the fact that I only have to see her 2 to 3 times a year and I can deal with that for the sake of my brother who has always been there for me. I also don't let his wife interfere with my relationship with my brother who I keep in touch with all the time. He calls me and I call him at work so I don't have to speak with you know who.

Also people who insult like that are usually jealous or unhappy with there own lot in life and I feel that the best revenge is to live well which luckily I do.

[Madam Reverie 2,958]

I had a SIL like that once... I chose the same tack as you. It was only a matter of time before she got drunk at a family party and made a total arse out of herself by calling me a 'f****ing bitch', because she wasn't winning an argument she'd picked.

Sadly, her brother found ways to defend her behaviours and as a consequence, I lost respect for him.

Relationship over!

[Fluffnomore 1,235]

My FIL often makes comments to those of us who live out of town: "You're so BIG!" etc. My husband went out for his 90th birthday and he got called fat about 400 times. It's incredibly sad. It might be the last time they see each other (sorry, we think that every time) and all S can remember is how rude his dad was. I saw him on my own last summer and despite being at my highest weight ever, he didn't say a word to me about it. Probably because he knew I would turn around and say, "Really? You want this weekend to be like that?"

I'd look forward to seeing him after I lose weight, except that I don't take him very seriously. His behaviors are crazy, and he's just as likely to say, "Oh my GOD, DON'T lose any more weight!" Can't win with some people. Or coexist peacefully.

[gastricsleever 259]

My FIL often makes comments to those of us who live out of town: "You're so BIG!" etc. My husband went out for his 90th birthday and he got called fat about 400 times. It's incredibly sad. It might be the last time they see each other (sorry, we think that every time) and all S can remember is how rude his dad was. I saw him on my own last summer and despite being at my highest weight ever, he didn't say a word to me about it. Probably because he knew I would turn around and say, "Really? You want this weekend to be like that?" I'd look forward to seeing him after I lose weight, except that I don't take him very seriously. His behaviors are crazy, and he's just as likely to say, "Oh my GOD, DON'T lose any more weight!" Can't win with some people. Or coexist peacefully.

It's funny, I dealt with the same thing from my grandfather on my moms side. I only saw him twice a year on thanksgiving and Christmas and because I was the only fat one, he ALWAYS made comments to me and it always ended in me leaving the table and crying. He would say in front of people "are you sure you want to have that piece of pumpkin pie?" Or at Christmas "Rachel, what's that, like your 3rd cookie?" So not only was it hard for me to be there, but also my mom never defended me! I would just look at her and she would shrug and when I would go away upset she would later say to me "you know Rachel he's an old man this may be his last holiday, etc. really?" That's not an excuse to talk to someone like that and make them feel so terrible about themselves especially on the holidays! Well when my grandfather passed away last September it was very hard for me to be upset. I mean, I am upset because it's sad when people passed away and I felt bad for my mom losing her father but for me he only ever brought negativity and pain in my life and made me feel horrible about myself! It really is sad when you treat people like that!

[ReDbEaN 654]

It's funny, I dealt with the same thing from my grandfather on my moms side. I only saw him twice a year on thanksgiving and Christmas and because I was the only fat one, he ALWAYS made comments to me and it always ended in me leaving the table and crying. He would say in front of people "are you sure you want to have that piece of pumpkin pie?" Or at Christmas "Rachel, what's that, like your 3rd cookie?" So not only was it hard for me to be there, but also my mom never defended me! I would just look at her and she would shrug and when I would go away upset she would later say to me "you know Rachel he's an old man this may be his last holiday, etc. really?" That's not an excuse to talk to someone like that and make them feel so terrible about themselves especially on the holidays! Well when my grandfather passed away last September it was very hard for me to be upset. I mean, I am upset because it's sad when people passed away and I felt bad for my mom losing her father but for me he only ever brought negativity and pain in my life and made me feel horrible about myself! It really is sad when you treat people like that!

My paternal grandmother (who is not even remotely skinny) always made comments when I would see her like "Heather, you've gained weight since I saw you last..." Until I told her something...then she was upset - she said she didn't realize she was doing that, apologized, and hasn't done it since. I think maybe some peopel aren't trying to be rude, like my grandmother...some are, and won't care if you say something. Either way, I'm the person who will call you out on things if you say it to me!!

[marfar7 1,532]

I cannot wait to see my SIL on turkey day. We have not spoken nor have we seen each other since January. At the time, she was about 35 pounds lighter than me and LOVED to gloat about it in a not so subtle manner.

She would give me her clothing rejects with a casual, "These may be too small for you, but you are dieting, right?". She loved to commiserate with me about our mutual attempts to follow whatever diet we were on but loved to point out that her points/calories/units were lower than mine because she was lighter.

Our last conversation was her snickering about another overweight acquaintance's failed weigh-in, laughing that she did SO MUCH better and me asking if she talked about me as nastily as she did everyone else.

She didn't like that. My bad...

Fast forward to Thanksgiving and me being at least 90 pounds down from our last visit. I would bet any amount of money she is up at least 10 or 20.

I can't wait!!!!!

Who do you look forward to seeing during this journey?

A couple months ago, when we were traveling home to Or from Ca, I arranged to have bfast at IHOP with a friend I hadn't seen in over 20 yrs. We went to high school together (I was always the fat friend) and she was the maid of honor at my first wedding 25 yrs ago (I was also the fat bride).

Fast forward to 2 mths ago. She weighed about 275. I'm down to about 150. Felt sooo good.

I'm evil too

[jdub81 8]

I am only a week post op, but after I achieve significant weight loss, i can't wait to see my FIL and step MIL. (My husband and I haven't seen them since our wedding day in October 2011, but I think we'll make an exception for me to gloat!)

My husband and I went on a camping trip in San Simeon, CA after dating for about a month. When my husband showed his dad pics from our trip, his dad said, "You should encourage her to loose weight!" He hadn't even met me yet and this was the first girlfriend my husband was introducing to the family (given their critical nature). Ever since then, I never trusted my in laws. And what is crazy is that my husband and his dad were obese too! After we got engaged a couple of years later, my FIL would send my husband emails of tiny CZ rings on eBay, and about divorce statistics... telling my husband to not marry me. He refused to come to our engagement party and I had to beg them (for my husband's sake) to come to our wedding. They gave use a broken and used vase for our wedding present.

Maybe after they see me all skinny, they'll want me to be part of the family, but I don't need their acceptance.

[Beach Lover 1,084]

I am only a week post op, but after I achieve significant weight loss, i can't wait to see my FIL and step MIL. (My husband and I haven't seen them since our wedding day in October 2011, but I think we'll make an exception for me to gloat!)

My husband and I went on a camping trip in San Simeon, CA after dating for about a month. When my husband showed his dad pics from our trip, his dad said, "You should encourage her to loose weight!" He hadn't even met me yet and this was the first girlfriend my husband was introducing to the family (given their critical nature). Ever since then, I never trusted my in laws. And what is crazy is that my husband and his dad were obese too! After we got engaged a couple of years later, my FIL would send my husband emails of tiny CZ rings on eBay, and about divorce statistics... telling my husband to not marry me. He refused to come to our engagement party and I had to beg them (for my husband's sake) to come to our wedding. They gave use a broken and used vase for our wedding present.

Maybe after they see me all skinny, they'll want me to be part of the family, but I don't need their acceptance.

I would have to say there will be a certain amount of self satisfaction the next time you see them. I am glad you don't need their acceptance because quite frankly they would have to work for mine after being that rude. The most important thing is your personal happiness and the relationship between you and your husband. Good luck to you with your journey!!

[ReDbEaN 654]

I am only a week post op, but after I achieve significant weight loss, i can't wait to see my FIL and step MIL. (My husband and I haven't seen them since our wedding day in October 2011, but I think we'll make an exception for me to gloat!)

My husband and I went on a camping trip in San Simeon, CA after dating for about a month. When my husband showed his dad pics from our trip, his dad said, "You should encourage her to loose weight!" He hadn't even met me yet and this was the first girlfriend my husband was introducing to the family (given their critical nature). Ever since then, I never trusted my in laws. And what is crazy is that my husband and his dad were obese too! After we got engaged a couple of years later, my FIL would send my husband emails of tiny CZ rings on eBay, and about divorce statistics... telling my husband to not marry me. He refused to come to our engagement party and I had to beg them (for my husband's sake) to come to our wedding. They gave use a broken and used vase for our wedding present.

Maybe after they see me all skinny, they'll want me to be part of the family, but I don't need their acceptance.

All I can say is WOW…RUDE!! Thankfully, it appears to have stopped with them and didn't carry on to their son! I don't blame you for wanting to show yourself off…but I'm like you, their opinion wouldn't matter! Good Luck

[LipstickLady 25,682]

So I wore these little (to me!) size 10 (size 10 bitches!!!!) slim black ankle pants with a silky tan and black polka dotted top that ties at the waist in a very flattering way and is just low enough to make the twins look UH-MAY-ZING without looking like I'm trying to hard.

Not only did my SIL not say a thing to me about my weight, but she didn't say a word directly to me AT ALL!

Hahahaha! Snoooooooort! (Ever laughed so hard you snort!ed?) Heeeeheeeheeeeee! Ahahahahaahahaaaaa! Snooooort! Heeeeeee!

She wasn't at all amused by all the selfies my teens and I took with various relatives either. Not even a little.

Snooooooort!

[LipstickLady 25,682]

Trying TOO hard. Sigh. Can't edit on iPad?

[Butterthebean 8,146]

Nice job lpl. shake your groove thing.

[ReDbEaN 654]

Way to work it, baby!!! Had to feel amazing!