To start off, I deserve this, I know I do. I dealt with morbid obesity my entire life, I took control of my life to make myself healthy. I work for every pound that is ever so slowly falling off. But I look at my friends, or my coworkers and feel bad for them because they've given up, they've decided they can't do it so have accepted a life of fatigue and self loathing, and misery....I feel bad for them, but at times feel guilty for feeling so good. They make comments often about how great I look and how happy I am....and I feel guilty. I know there's nothing I can do other than support them, but it makes me sad sometimes.

HW 312, pre-op (RNY) 255, current weight 198

Although it's human nature and can't be helped sometimes, don't feel guilty for choosing a healthy happy life for yourself and your family.

WLS is out there for anybody who deals with the obesity disease. They just need to make the right choice for themselves.

All you can do is be proud of yourself and keep on with the good work.

I have had this conversation with my mom several times that I know how horrible I felt physically before surgery and sometimes I wonder what took me so long to make I this decision (I'm only 34 but have been obese pretty much my entire Adult life) I wonder if people feel the way that I felt, that they weren't worth feeling any better. Sometimes I want to say "you don't have to feel like sh*t all the time" there are options.

But then I remember that I had to come to this place on my own and so does everyone else. Everyone is a full and whole person no matter their weight!

HW 344, DOS 320, Surgery Date 2/20/13, CW 229 Sent from my iPad using RNYTalk

I feel very guilty about how well I'm doing and how happy I am about it.

I feel guilty for another reason, too. My twin girls are both overweight - and I feel that their poor eating habits were learned from me over the years. I also fed them nothing but junk as children - homemade Cookies, cakes, pastry, and fatty comfort foods. They weren't overweight children but both have gained weight as adults. One is the weight I was before surgery. She suffers from depression (hereditary on her father's side) and cannot find a job in her field. She got laid off from her full time job and could only find part time work so she's having money troubles and eating badly. The other is getting bigger than I ever was. She is working on a second degree in laboratory science - her first is in Marine Biology but she couldn't find a job doing that. Right now she is doing an internship at a local hospital in addition to working at the blood center. She has anxiety attacks and is developing co morbidities quickly that are affecting her health.

I am happy for me, but worried sick about them. I feel responsible for their unhappiness. :-(

I feel very guilty about how well I'm doing and how happy I am about it. I feel guilty for another reason' date=' too. My twin girls are both overweight - and I feel that their poor eating habits were learned from me over the years. I also fed them nothing but junk as children - homemade Cookies, cakes, pastry, and fatty comfort foods. They weren't overweight children but both have gained weight as adults. One is the weight I was before surgery. She suffers from depression (hereditary on her father's side) and cannot find a job in her field. She got laid off from her full time job and could only find part time work so she's having money troubles and eating badly. The other is getting bigger than I ever was. She is working on a second degree in laboratory science - her first is in Marine Biology but she couldn't find a job doing that. Right now she is doing an internship at a local hospital in addition to working at the blood center. She has anxiety attacks and is developing co morbidities quickly that are affecting her health. I am happy for me, but worried sick about them. I feel responsible for their unhappiness. :-([/quote']

nothing is wore than mommy guilt . Perhaps, hopefully, they'll see your success and get help? My son is nine, an extremely tall 9. He tends to be on the chunky side, within the first couple weeks of my surgery, he'd lost 5 pounds. He hasn't lost any further but he's at a stable 101 pounds growing like a weed so hopefully he's learning new and healthier habits from all this.

HW 312, pre-op (RNY) 255, current weight 198

Our ability to support others is a gift and one that we should all share with every opportunity that presents itself. But I believe that we have a much greater, much more valuable gift that we offer to everyone in our lives every minute of every single day - we are happy, healthy, living, breathing, loving examples of what can be. Nothing we can ever do or say will ever come close to the motivational power of what we have accomplished. The message is clear - if I can do it, so can you.

nothing is wore than mommy guilt <img src='http://www.bariatricpal.com/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/sad.png' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' />. Perhaps' date=' hopefully, they'll see your success and get help? My son is nine, an extremely tall 9. He tends to be on the chunky side, within the first couple weeks of my surgery, he'd lost 5 pounds. He hasn't lost any further but he's at a stable 101 pounds growing like a weed so hopefully he's learning new and healthier habits from all this. HW 312, pre-op (RNY) 255, current weight 198[/quote']

I have to say that my mom had rny when i was 24 and i resented her for a few years. As i was so over weight my whole life the. I realized that it was no longer my moms fault that i was they way i was i am an adult and i was continuing to do that to my self. I had rny at 30 it toon a while for me to accept it as something I could do as well. I feel great and my son who is 14 has also lost 20 pounds since i had it he even does laps around the house every night and now we weight the same. It had been a journey for all of us. I wish my mom had sat me down a lit earlier and said to me how great she felt and how talked to me more about the process instead of just saying she was doing it for her and not really talking about it. I think i may have looked into it sooner if she was more real with me. Idk just a thought.