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Excited but heartbroken



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My surgery date is almost here, I have 2 days to go. I'm excited to finally be able to have my surgery. I didn't tell many coworkers but my cousin told an old coworker/friend, his reaction was something I wasn't expecting...he said I was cheating that if I worked harder I could have done it one my own. I was crushed. I couldn't believe someone who I was once really close to...someone I shared so much with thought I didn't try!! In the past he's seen how I worked Sooo hard to lose 50 lbs and then gain it all back. Hurts to think that he considers me a quitter for wanting to get this surgery to better my health :/

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You aren't a quitter!!! You are doing what you have to do to have a better quality of life!!! Everyone is made different. My diabetes prevents me from losing weight on my own.

Don't let others dictate how you should live your life! Besides... What difference does it make to him??? This is your journey. Rock it!!!

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Yes, this is a very common uneducated attitude. I'm having my surgery at a top University hospital where they do research on obesity. There is a lot of scientific research that supports gastric bypass surgery for the morbidly obese. There are also many research studies that show that 95% of the time with obese people they will gain the weight back. Obesity is a complex disease. Statisticaly, weight loss surgery is the best treatment. Maybe, in the future, something else will come along. Obesity is a huge problem in our country. I'm not going to waste anymore of my life. Best of lick a d be happy!

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Ignorance. A lot of people voice opinions with absolutely no information to back it up. People with the strongest opinions are often people who have never had a problem. They don't understand all the factors involved, physiologically and mentally. If it's someone close to you and you want support, try to educate them about rny. If you no longer have much contact with this person just let it go. YOU know what's right for you. Ignore the comments.

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Wouldn't life be great if everyone was nice and slim, didn't have to worry about anything they ate, nor the amount they ate, but yet wouldn't put any weight on, just stayed the same? If no one had to ever worry about becoming a diabetic, heart disease, cancer and the other numerous diseases related to this one problem, obesity. Unfortunately life isn't that way (actually it would probably be boring if it were), some place a gene mutated, went array, it did something and a number of us could work are rears off, starve ourselves to death and yet in the end we were still overweight. I guess I was blessed because somewhere along my life's path I decided that I was responsible for myself, no one else. I respect everyone's opinion because they are thinking of my well being, but yet they are not fighting for my life, they can't, as I have too. So does it hurt when someone doesn't agree with me in what I have to do for myself, No. I usually inform them that until they have walked in my shoes, they will never understand my decision, but I thank them anyway for being concerned because I know they care. Just not informed, nor educated, nor me, but I'll always be their friend. But this is me and how I think. I might be right, I might be wrong, but in the end it was my decision, my responsibility. No one else doesn't have to take on the guilt of what decision I made.

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I've had several people tell me that I didn't need the surgery & proceed to tell of someone they knew that died after having it. I always told them of my friend that did it & had no complications. It was MY decision, yet they feel compelled to tell me why they don't agree with it. Well, ya know what? I'm 21 months out and have lost all of my weight. I love myself & thats all that matters. The same people that told me I was crazy to have it done are the ones telling me me how great I look. There are people even now that will tell me they would never do it & that's ok. That's their choice, not mine. I have no regrets and am loving my life as a smaller me. As far as cheating? You are having your insides totally cut apart and rearranged to reach a goal. It is not an easy road & is a lifestyle that you have to maintain. It's most definitely not cheating! People will always have something to gripe about; you just have to chalk it up to ignorance & hug yourself! Congrats on having this wonderful opportunity, not everyone has a chance to do it!

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You do what you want with your life & body. I needed & wanted help I got it. I feel great now. I think I would had done it but it would had been harder & I would regain cuz it happen before. Ignore keep your head up & power to you. We back you up here in the group.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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      1. This update has no replies.
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