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This is a text I just received from a "friend"

U are not THAT BIG ur just, "Built"....... Like a brick house! :) don't get too skinny.

I am so ready for little comments like this to

be over!

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I used to get the same remarks from "friends" they asked me why are u taking the easy way out, just stop eating!

let me tell u, it pissed me off!!! They dont know the emotional stuff we go thru. going to the store and hopeing they at least have a plus size section for you to browse. DOnt mind the texts and ignore them. doesnt look like your so called friends are so supportive. my excuse to them was its my decision and its better for some health issues I have been going thru.

Hope this helps!

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Im starting to get those comments. You weren't that big to begin. Hubby just cut down on food & that's all.

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Comments like that suck!! <_< I get them a lot from my size ZERO sister! Some people seem to think it's soooo easy!

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I've learned that people who aren't big or have never been big will never understand what it's like to be big and therefore will say hurtful things but put them in a fat suit for a day and they will respect you more than anyone because they will see what it's like!

Sent from my iPhone using RNYTalk

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I completely understand . I've Always been thick ( I like to think of my size as size sexy lol) but people still say to me ... Your young and just quit eating and your not even that big .. NEWSFLASH PEOPLE... It doesn't matter what it looks like because I feel every pound that I am carrying ! It's not about them ! It's about becoming healthier and we will soon see who our real supporters are once the pounds start falling off !

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No matter how big or "small" you are or what people "see" you to be, surgery is NOT the easy way out.... surgery is MAJOR.... yes does surgery make you not like food = yes, does surgery help you with your weight loss = yes. Surgery is only a tool just like weight watchers and Jenny Craig it is YOU who makes it work and don't let anyone tell you different. This surgery is not easy by no means... just ask anyone on this site. The way I read the txt from your friend..... is that most people are not aware that weight loss surgery is not only for the people who are 600 lbs it is for anyone with a BMI of I believe 36 (at least that is what my insurance says) with one other medical issue. I too was not aware that mildly overweight people could get this surgery... If I knew that I would have done this years ago - LOL. Your friend is saying you are not that big and too skinny is not good either. Ignore all the negative and think of only positive.... some people are just not sensitive to weight issue as other people.... they just don't know or understand. Good luck with your weight loss :)

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Oh My Goodness! Don't get me started on the things I have been told over the last year. I have been on a supervised program for almost a year and surgery is right around the corner. Everybody is an expert, especially the ones who have been thin all their lives! So many have reminded me that people DIE having this surgery! Excuse me, but do you think I am an idiot? I didn't just put my name on a piece of paper, fold it up and put it in a box! I have researched this idea 9 ways till Sunday. I now enjoy replying, "Yes, I am aware of the risk, but I am also aware that my risk of dying from my diabetes, elevated Cholesterol, high blood pressure and sleep apnea are far greater than the risks associated with surgery! Good LUCK!

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Another comment I hate is, "You have such a pretty face, if you just ate a little less or exercised a little more you'd be pretty all over." Really people?!? How about I tell you that you have butter face. Everything's hot but ur face! We aren't cheating by doing this, we have a metabolic disorder and need a metabolic remedy. Period.

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Another comment I hate is' date=' "You have such a pretty face, if you just ate a little less or exercised a little more you'd be pretty all over." Really people?!? How about I tell you that you have butter face. Everything's hot but ur face! We aren't cheating by doing this, we have a metabolic disorder and need a metabolic remedy. Period.[/quote']

Butter face omg I can't stop laughing... People think this is an easy way out. Who enjoys vomiting not me. Who enjoy there stomach touching the sheering wheel not me. Who enjoys the shirt being tight around the arm not me. We all decided to change for the better & we will all be sexy & happy.

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People say to me "you look great big and you dont need to lose weight" *NEWSFLASH* I have a BMI of 39 and will I still look "great" when diabetes leads to me having toes amputated or I'm in ITU after a massive heart attack? Why do people assume I'm doing this for vanity. I already look "great" but that's not the friggin point!

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Another comment I hate is' date=' "You have such a pretty face, if you just ate a little less or exercised a little more you'd be pretty all over." Really people?!? How about I tell you that you have butter face. Everything's hot but ur face! We aren't cheating by doing this, we have a metabolic disorder and need a metabolic remedy. Period.[/quote']

Story of my life this is what I hear everyday! Oh u have such a pretty face u just need to eat less and excerise more and they just need to STFU!!

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People say to me "you look great big and you dont need to lose weight" *NEWSFLASH* I have a BMI of 39 and will I still look "great" when diabetes leads to me having toes amputated or I'm in ITU after a massive heart attack? Why do people assume I'm doing this for vanity. I already look "great" but that's not the friggin point!

True you sure don't wanna lose your toes or any body parts.

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That was maybe a bit dramatic, but it really annoys me that when people give you an opinion on whether you should do RNY, it's always based on how good they think you look.

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That was maybe a bit dramatic' date=' but it really annoys me that when people give you an opinion on whether you should do RNY, it's always based on how good they think you look.[/quote']

Not dramatic at all. The bottom line is simple, how many 90 year old morbidly obese people do you know?

I doubt anyone on this site knows of any. Fat = death period. Sure genetics take a huge part but we can't do anything about that so control what you can and the rest is up to your body.

Here's to life.

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    • Doughgurl

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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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