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Surgery 10/17/13 scared



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Surgery scared have 2 small children. What is something happens and I leave my two boys motherless? Am I being selfish.

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You are 100% not being selfish, just the opposite. I have four children and when that thought comes to mind I say to myself, am I living now? How much longer will I live in this condition? Isn't the small risk worth the rest of their lives having a happy! Healthy mom who can enjoy life? I just ask GOD that my journey doesn't end but rather the rest of my life, living, begin.

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Thank you so much that really helps.

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it's absolutely normal to feel scared. I had the same feeling I have two young boys, one still in diapers. But you need to remember we are doing this to be healthier and be around longer for yourself, kids, family, etc. I stopped being scared once I woke up from the anesthesia. Have a good support system at the hospital. I had my wife and parents with me.

Trust all the research you did on the procedure and the surgeons.

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Princeton Baptist in b'ham Alabama dr John Matthews. How about you

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Your going to do amazing !!! Go into this positive and your kids are going to be so blessed to have a healthy mom after this :) God Bless

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Dear you are being selfish if you don't have the surgery. The wall of weight that you have built will only get bigger harder to carry as time goes on. You may have good health now but I can tell you in 2 5 10 years it won't be. It will slowly eat at you with a joint pain here, a type II borderline there, problems breathing and no energy. I have 3 boys one has autism. I got he light last year that I cannot die right now. I am 49 not really old but not so young. In the last 4 1/2 months I have lost 90 lbs and got back to a place I thought I could never return. If you need this tool, run don't walk towards it. If you feel that you can lose the weight the regular way I have your back. But if you feel that you have gone down that road and it hasn't worked, come to the sleeved side. In the long run when you are playing with your kids and have all the energy and health in the world you will thank god that he put you on this road to a better quality of life. Remember you could get hit by a bus tomorrow so using your children as an excuse will get you know where and all alone behind your wall. Come out to the daylight, we will be waiting for you with a great sunscreen!

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Thank you to all who have replied. Really really has helped to see things in a different light

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Glad to see others feel this way also. I have 3 little boys and this is also my biggest fear with the surgery. But then it hits me when i see others said, how much living am I doing without the surgery? I want to be able to do all the things with my kids that I can't do with them know because of my weight. I see their disappointment when I can't do things with them like run outside and ride bikes with them. I want/need better for them and myself. We can do this!!

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Glad to see others feel this way also. I have 3 little boys and this is also my biggest fear with the surgery. But then it hits me when i see others said' date=' how much living am I doing without the surgery? I want to be able to do all the things with my kids that I can't do with them know because of my weight. I see their disappointment when I can't do things with them like run outside and ride bikes with them. I want/need better for them and myself. We can do this!![/quote']

I am certainly not living my life. I don't want to be room mom, chaperone field trips, go to major league sporting events with my husband.....you get the idea. I want to look and feel great and hang out with my kids instead of hiding in the house.

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It is so normal to be scared! I was terrified I was making the wrong decision. But I needed to be a healthier Mom to my little boy. It just wasn't fair to him anymore. I could not do it on my own...I had been trying (and failing) my entire adult life. So, I took the leap. I feel so blessed everyday. Your children will thank you. I will keep you in my prayers.

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I was terrified of surgery. I was angry I couldn't get my eating under control and lose the weight on my own. I finally just put myself in the hands of the surgeon...God. I woke up and had some pressure and was weak. The first week was difficult but it wasn't as horrible as I thought it would be.everyday was better. Now fast forward 8 months later and I am 125 lbs lighter than the highest weight and look and feel wonderful. It was so worth it...only regret I have is waiting so long! The anticipation was far scarier than the actual process...I am the mother of two boys...good luck u will be great

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thanks for sharing. It calms me down a bit. please keep in touch!

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My surgery is the 21 of October I am scared and nervous at the same time I have a husband and two small children of my own I know I am making the right choice for me and my family to be around longer but still scared anyone felling the same way?

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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