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I left Mexicali and Dr Aceves without a sleeve...



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Yes, it does happen. People changing their mind, even as they are IN the hospital about to have the surgery. Looking around the hospital, talking to the surgeon, and knowing 'it doesn't feel quite right'. I had emailed several members here and begged them to talk to me on the phone, to give me some reassurance that I was doing the right thing, to have some sort of hand holding. No-one followed through, no one was interested in talking to me in person. The ONLY person who agreed to talk to me (a prolific poster on a different forum) warned me not to trust reviews, and to be very careful....She talked about paid reviews, coordinators posing as past patients, hidden complication rates. I spoke to Dr Aceves as I was sitting in one of his patient's rooms, and he told me of complications some of his patients had suffered and I realized none of those stories had made it to the boards or to any of the forums I participate in. It made me realize that maybe there was some truth to the story that many reviews here are paid reviews....that the reality is not nearly as rosy as the fabulous success stories this forum is littered with.

And so I came home today...sleeveless. A fruitless trip to Mexicali that did not pan out as expected or as planned. I did get to meet Dr Aceves, Dr Campos, and his team. I got a tour of the hospital, and got to stay in Hotel Lucerna. I met some of Dr Aceves' patients who all seemed to be recovering as planned. I salute them and their bravery. I salute Dr Aceves for his brutal honesty and integrity. I could see the pride he has for his hospital in his eyes, hear it in his voice.

As for me? I am broke, disappointed, and confused.

Trust is important. I have absolutely no clue how this Medical Tourism business can be regulated better, how trust can be built, how complication rates can be better and more reliably conveyed.

It certainly is not for the faint at heart.

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I have read a bit of your posts the last couple of days... And it sounds like quite an ordeal.

I do wish the information here included more of a true story. The fact of the matter complications happen with ALL doctors. Here and Mexico, but for some reason it's taboo to speak of problems with the Mexican doctors?

Why? Does it make them less than? Does it make them less desirable? I for one would feel more comfortable knowing the good and the...I can't even say bad. It's more like truth, what's wrong with truth?

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But I offered to edit that and leave it out. You think that is not good enough. Why?!?!?!

Perhaps just writing a review and your thoughts without making it about a topic that was closed.

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Meh, I had no problem finding less than favorable reviews about various mexican doctors here on VST.

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I understand why the mods are doing what they are. It helps to control flaming etc. However, it also leads me to wonder whether there's been a horror story about my coordinator or Dr. that has also been hidden that could have helped me decide to go with someone else.

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People, really, enough already. We do not, have not and will not ever hide or delete posts about any doctors, good, bad or otherwise. As long as they are in compliance with forum rules and based upon the personal experience of the poster it stays.

Do any of you have any idea of the lengths Alex has gone to over the years to protect members, find the truth about things, etc.? He has put his whole life into this and the needs of our members and the level of disrespect and questioning of his ethics truly disappointments me.

Sent from my iPad using VST

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I will say one thing here.. Susan and Alex have been very good about trying to make sure that the people that post here are "real" it's like a full time job for sure. But I have seen no favoritism for one doctor over another. If a dr or coordinator pushing a doctor comes on here trying to drum up business or bash other doctors. It's not tolerated. But it's hard to catch everyone that's for sure.

Just a few weeks ago there was some disturbing information about one doctor. And Alex did his due diligence by looking into it and helping correct it so no other patients should have to suffer.

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I just cleaned up (AKA edited) and merged the (duplicate) threads.

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I will say one thing here.. Susan and Alex have been very good about trying to make sure that the people that post here are "real" it's like a full time job for sure. But I have seen no favoritism for one doctor over another. If a dr or coordinator pushing a doctor comes on here trying to drum up business or bash other doctors. It's not tolerated. But it's hard to catch everyone that's for sure.

Just a few weeks ago there was some disturbing information about one doctor. And Alex did his due diligence by looking into it and helping correct it so no other patients should have to suffer.

Which doctor? I must have missed all of that lol

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I'm sorry you left Mexicali without a sleeve! Although, I do believe that if it didn't feel right to you that you made the right decision.

I was sleeved over 2 years ago with Dr. Aceves. I'm not sure, but I am assuming Nina is still the only one that coordinates the surgeries? Correct me if I'm wrong on that please. I don't think she would have the time to come on the board and pretend she is someone else to drum up business for Dr. Aceves. His reputation speaks for itself.

If you would have contacted me I would have been glad to talk to you and share my experience. It was very scary going into the hospital with everything in Spanish and being in a foreign place and not understanding what most of the people where saying when we walked in! Part of me, for a few minutes, wanted to run out the door. I was able to get my emotions under control, speak with the doctors, and felt 100% at ease with my decision. My surgery went great, I had a great recovery and over 2 years later and 110 pounds lighter I couldn't be happier!

I do wonder why you didn't talk to Nina about complications? That was one of the first questions I had asked and she was upfront and honest when we spoke about that. I also talked to Dr. Aceves and Dr. Campos about that at the hospital and, like you said, they were honest in their discussions.

I do wish it could have turned out differently for you and that you would be home and recovering right now. I hope you are able to find peace with your decision and move on from here.

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Argh! Please DO NOT discuss moderation issues within this or any thread. Please contact us directly if you have any issues with mods, moderation etc.

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Stephanie, I applaud your bravery for listening to your own intuition. You should only absolutely do this when it feels 100% right. Kudos to you for sharing your story and letting people know it's okay to change your mind. I don't think this reflects negatively on the surgeon or the surgery center at all - In fact, just the opposite.

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Some people just aren't ready. I can respect that. As far as wanting a stranger to call you and reassure you it's going to be ok? I just don't get that. This is why for good reason there are psych evals and waiting periods before this major elective surgery.

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Regarding the original post. I understand having cold feet. I was sleeved near my home at a center of exccellence and i too gave thought to sayin no thanks the morning of surgery. I would think the stakes are higher or at least ratcheted up if you have too fly to another country for surgery. At least you got to meet them so you know more now than before. I hope you find peace in your decision whether you eventually get surgery or not. Either way its your call and nobody elses to make.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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