gain goal regain How was your 5:2 day today?

[Oregondaisy 2,019]

Wow! So nice to see all the updates.

 

I am amazed anyone can fast with a man in the house. Men make it so much more difficult.

 

Coops I am so happy for you! 2 lbs away from goal. You're doing it!

 

Shery, I am really happy to hear about your new guy. He's the first one yet to make it past a few dates so he must be pretty special. Enjoy yourself!! He sounds like he is very good bf material and exactly what you're looking for. Can't wait for more updates.

 

Brown, can't wait to hear how the play goes! And I'm glad to hear your scale is going in the right direction too.

 

I'm still trying to take off 2 lbs that I gained and can't seem to take off. I try to fast and all these things keep coming up where food is all around me.

Sheryl, I would be very interested to hear what you're eating on your days where you're only getting 600 calories.

 

Florinda, I hope things go well with your mom. Are you still here in Oregon?

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

No, you don't want to hear about my low calorie days - which is pretty much most days I am by myself - because it isn't a "plan" it just happens. For example, I make a yummy veggie egg beater omelette and add a bit of Protein like turkey sausages. It is my typical Breakfast as I work hard to get veggies in so this is a veggie/protein start to my day - I estimate the omelette to be maybe 150-200 calories plus another 100 calories for the low carb/low fat sausages so maybe 250-300 TOTAL. Used to be i would eat half first thing, then half for mid morning snack. Then, I was eating second half for lunch... then I noticed sometimes I was having second half for dinner.... and there were a few days that it was still in the fridge the next morning. So, that is just an example of how I get ridiculously low calorie days - by not eating. I don't recommend it, it isn't healthy and it isn't normal. I am working very hard to eat more normally even if the scale bounces a few pounds - I want to be healthy! I am eating even when not hungry which goes against my grain, but I don't want to wind up as one of those sickly looking post WLS people. I love how I look - I look healthy, and I think young for my age, just happy with how I have turned out post weight loss and don't want to screw it up.

This is the nutrient analysis I am having done:

http://www.spectracell.com/clinicians/products/mnt/

I don't know if it is legit or just hooey... but it sounds good and my doc thinks it is far superior to standard labs.

Yes, Tino has many of the attributes I am looking for. I think he will be a good boyfriend - so far so good.... but we shall see how things unfold. As I get to know him better and better I realize he has many things in common with Steven which at first made me a little uncomfortable, but I realized that so far the things he has in common are the "good things". He is incredibly reliable (unlike Steven) and has so far kept commitments and promises almost to a fault. He apologized too many times for being 30 minutes late (he called and told me he was late!)... as he said "never keep a beautiful woman waiting"..haha... and when he showed up it was for a surprise date on the lake again - boat in tow - which is what made him late. I thought we were just going out for a lunch and hanging out. He is also very affectionate and communicative which I really do love.

I don't like that he sometimes seems like a food pusher, especially at first. If truth be told though, my eating has not been normal. Take a normal post WLS person - over 2 years out... and consider if they were eating about 1/4 of what they should be eating. That was me. So in fairness, he wasn't really a food pusher but rather could not understand why I ate so little. I have had the surgery talk though and he has backed off from commenting on my food and at the same time I really am trying to eat more.. especially when I am with him.

Denise - you point out yet another reason I never want to live with a man again. I will have my son at home again as he graduates in June... I will make an exception for him... but living alone keeps the junky food out of the house that is for sure!

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

oh, tonight I am cooking dinner for Tino for the first time. I am so nervous I bought a ton of food because I eat so little that I misjudge how much food to have. Tino is a huge eater (big tall guy) so I just wanted to be sure he got enough. I don't know why it is so important to me for this first home cooked dinner to go so well...haha.. I must really like him.

Veggies and dip, cheese, crackers and little chicken skewers for appetizer since he really is a huge eater...

Salmon and salad (with oven garlic fries for him) for main course

Raspberry sorbet and raspberries to round it out

[feedyoureye 3,087]

Sounds wonderful! Enjoy!

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

So, last night was a bust. I had planned a nice romantic dinner ... he was supposed to arrive at 6:30. At about 530 he called and said he needed to delay due to a high drama family thing going on. At some point, it was gonna be delayed to 9pm. I cancelled because well, i start work at 6am so that is just way too late for me to start dinner and a movie like we had planned.

He called me about 9:30 and I didn't answer because I was enjoying an episode of something on netflix and wasn't in the mood to discuss the huge amount of food I have all ready to cook - my goodness it is like a week's worth of food for me and much of it will go to waste now. Anyway, he left me a vmail saying how he wouldn't take the call either, knows I must be all mad etc etc.

I am annoyed, but I am not that pissed just annoyed. I sent a text this am saying... hey, all is good, no worries but he is ignoring me. i was a little worried that he is a bit of a high drama/high maintenance kind of guy and if that turns out to be the case, bye-bye. We shall see.

Oh, family drama seems to be a theme with him. He has been divorced for 5 years and is still in open warfare with his exwife. Not a good sign. The family drama last night involved a nephew who's wife is having an affair in Dallas or some damn thing. I am just not a drama kinda woman....

[Oregondaisy 2,019]

It's pretty hard to get away from ex wife drama. I have had to  deal with it during every single one of my last relationships. One of them broke up over ex drama. She dragged the adult kids into it.

 

I am lucky Bill has little to no contact with his exwife, and his ex gf seems to have disappeared. We still don't know if she is pregnant, but I am guessing not, since she would be showing by now. He's never called her and she hasn't called or texted again.

 

Good luck with this Sheryl. If it comes down to it, you'll have to tell him to make a choice cause no shows are a deal breaker. He sounds so great otherwise.

 

I am really happy that I made dinner for Bill and I just didn't want to eat it. I wasn't hungry and I was happy about it. So I hope the scale starts going back down.

[feedyoureye 3,087]

Sheryl... cook and freeze. Next time he comes over, microwave and ready to eat!

(as for all the lovely fresh stuff.... )

[Oregondaisy 2,019]

I was up all night last night with Bill. He finally was in so much pain in the middle of the night, that actually wanted to go to the hospital. Up until now, he's been afraid because  wiht his CA insurance, everything will be out of network. I knew he had to get to the point where he didn't care and would agree to go to the emergency room. We went at 1 am .

It turned out he needed his gall bladder out. The doctor said it was really badly infected and diseased. No wonder he kept running  a high fever. He also has a plugged  common bile duct and he's going to have to go to a different hospital next week, as the surgeon was not able to fix it. Apparently, what he needs to have done isn't done at our hospital. That doesn't surprise me but it pisses me off.  I'll talk more to the doctor in the morning. He is actually my band doctor and I just adore him. He's also a general surgeon besides a bariatric surgeon.

So he's all drugged up and sleeping and finally not in pain. I've been eating junk food all day again.

 

I will try hard tomorrow not to eat just because I am stressed out. It's really hard. All I want is junk.

[feedyoureye 3,087]

I was up all night last night with Bill. He finally was in so much pain in the middle of the night, that actually wanted to go to the hospital. Up until now, he's been afraid because  wiht his CA insurance, everything will be out of network. I knew he had to get to the point where he didn't care and would agree to go to the emergency room. We went at 1 am .

It turned out he needed his gall bladder out. The doctor said it was really badly infected and diseased. No wonder he kept running  a high fever. He also has a plugged  common bile duct and he's going to have to go to a different hospital next week, as the surgeon was not able to fix it. Apparently, what he needs to have done isn't done at our hospital. That doesn't surprise me but it pisses me off.  I'll talk more to the doctor in the morning. He is actually my band doctor and I just adore him. He's also a general surgeon besides a bariatric surgeon.

So he's all drugged up and sleeping and finally not in pain. I've been eating junk food all day again.

 

I will try hard tomorrow not to eat just because I am stressed out. It's really hard. All I want is junk.

So sorry you guys are going through this! But glad he finally got his butt in there and found out what was happening... hang in there... I have been junking out too the last few days,

 fasting today....

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

Well, I had quite the weekend. Horse related injuries... turns out my horse does NOT like having a gun fired by someone on her back..haha.. even if it is just primer shots. I would have stayed on except that the gun safety rules are that you reholster your pistol before dealing with an out of control horse. I am left handed and the clinic provided the gear - the holsters were set for right handed persons. Comedy of errors and I fell off. Ouch. I fell pretty light, almost stayed on my feet so the side I hit the ground is not sore at all. The opposite side - my hip, waist and knee are sore - they all got twisted. Ouch. That happened Sat so I decided to accept Tino's invite to go boating on Sunday instead of my riding plans.

I had mixed feelings because it was a boat party with his 13 year old daughter (who I hadn't met) and a bunch of her friends. It was super fun though, glad I went.

We worked out the whole issue around the cancellation. He kinda freaked out on me a little bit after that whole dinner fiasco and turns out he has alot of stuff in life (ie he discovered a leak in his roof and needs to do major home repair plus some business related stuff) and was feeling panicked like he didn't have time for a girlfriend etc. I had one of those... "you gotta be kidding me... I could have stayed with Steven for this bull" moments. Instead, I was calm and mature and just asked what he wanted. He told me he wants to see me and just was feeling like he had screwed it all up. I let him know that I am a grown up, we don't need to see each other all the time and we don't need to have 10 hour dates (the boating) so why don't we just chill a little, cut back a little, and take care of some stuff in life. He was so happy, relieved and it seems to me we are still talking everyday and seeing each other every few days... which is PLENTY for me. Plenty, really.

I enjoy my time with Tino a great deal although there are a few things about him that raise some of concerns about long term compatibility BUT I was looking for a boyfriend to do fun stuff with, that I enjoy talking to and that matches my energy - he is really a good match for all that, and I figure enjoy it while it lasts!

His youngest daughter - the 13 year old - is a complete doll. I like her alot and was surprised how warm and friendly she was to me. I am not sure I would have been that way at that age to a strange woman taking a parent's attention. I hear she approved of my pictures on POF early on and told her dad he should marry me because of my horses...haha. kids.

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

Have you been following the various threads about so many of us being bullies? It seems to have started with a post by someone who wanted to know who smoked, had surgery and lived to tell about it. A few people were less than diplomatic in their replies. Then I think it was either lipstick lady or madame reverie started a thread called "we are all adults here" where there was a fair amount of silliness and a little bit of belittling frankly. Now the latest is the bariatric bullies thread.

http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/309338-bariatric-bullies-you-know-who-you-are/page-5

So, what I think about this is I was called a bully by someone a few months ago and I think he was completely out of line. It is like bully has become the new word you can call someone and it is is "irrefutable" ... like if somebody labels me (or anyone) a bully it is simply the truth because the "victim" called it that. Flip side, some people like to be funny, witty or sometimes just really direct and I think say the truth in hurtful ways. Many obese people are super overly sensitve too... I should just not read the threads, but at times it makes me wonder if I am getting as much out of this website as I put into it...

[swizzly 901]

Oh good GOD. WTF is that about?!? "Bariatric bullies"?? I soooo avoid everywhere but here, cos omg the DRAMA. I just can't.

[feedyoureye 3,087]

Well. Some people just can't live without drama! 

 

 

 

-----

 

His youngest daughter - the 13 year old - is a complete doll. I like her alot and was surprised how warm and friendly she was to me.  I am not sure I would have been that way at that age to a strange woman taking a parent's attention.  I hear she approved of my pictures on POF early on and told her dad he should marry me because of my horses...haha.  kids.

How sweet is that. That is something I would get a little worried about, the kid getting attached then left. It can be hard enough for an adult that "gets left" or the like. 

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

Me too.. especially since I would love to recruit a 13 yo girl to ride my older horse . Tino joked that he can't meet my my sons for a year cuz I told him Steven never met them even after seeing each other for a year. Of course that was a different kind of relationship but I am still cautious on this point

[Oregondaisy 2,019]

Have you been following the various threads about so many of us being bullies?  It seems to have started with a post by someone who wanted to know who smoked, had surgery and lived to tell about it. A few people were less than diplomatic in their replies.  Then I think it was either lipstick lady or madame reverie started a thread called "we are all adults here" where there was a fair amount of silliness and a little bit of belittling frankly.  Now the latest is the bariatric bullies thread.

http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/309338-bariatric-bullies-you-know-who-you-are/page-5

 

So, what I think about this is I was called a bully by someone a few months ago and I think he was completely out of line.  It is like bully has become the new word you can call someone and it is is "irrefutable"  ... like if somebody labels me (or anyone) a bully it is simply the truth because the "victim" called it that.  Flip side, some people like to be funny, witty or sometimes just really direct and I think say the truth in hurtful ways.  Many obese people are super overly sensitve too...  I should just not read the threads, but at times it makes me wonder if I am getting as much out of this website as I put into it...

 

 

I liked that Alex locked the thread. I like the article he wrote about supporting each other rather than tear someone down. I've never been one to jump all over someone when they admitted to eating a twinkie. I'm so non confrontational, I would rather just find another post to read.

 

I can't believe so many people would take the time to argue with someone online.