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How many of you never got a goal weight number told or suggested to you by your doctor of the WLS center team? Did it bother you? Did you have to make something up, perhaps pulling something out of the BMI healthy normal section? Where did your number come from and what does it mean? Did you pick a different number even though your doctor gave you one? Perhaps because you had a different idea.

I know: no simple answer.

I am curious because I picked my number from the BMI chart, hit it, but am still wondering where should I end up? It is pretty easy to park at my current weight with my current lifestyle of nutrition and fitness. However, Is hypothetically gaining 10 lbs over my " ideal weight" ok if that places me in overweight instead of normal according to the BMI chart? I am not happy yet with my physique and more needs to be done. i just do not know if I can play the swap game forever with regards to body weight versus body composition. It is a lot of diligent work day after day. The 10 lb gain would be pure lean muscle gain and I have already been playing the fat for lean muscle weight swap game for 5-6 months now with some success. I would like to continue to bulk out with broad shoulders, large quads, well defined calves, powerful back and lean waist. And keep my weight parked on a good goal weight (currently, it is 180 - middle of normal range).

But I digress. The real question remains to be answered: how do you pick a goal weight?

Think about this topic question. How does it apply to you in your post op experience? What experiences have you had, are having or looking forward to having? I would like to hear from men and women, pre sleeve, newly sleeved and vet, different physical body composition goals, those that have it all figured out and those that are struggling, etc. no one is excluded from answering this topic question and I hope the threads serves as a resource for future VST members.

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From a post I made yesterday....

You know I never really discussed a "goal weight" with my surgeon. And if he did.

It probably sounded like the teacher in "Charlie brown"

Wha wha wha... Approved

wha wha wha...surgery date

I picked a number (in the healthy BMI range) not really putting my full belief into it really being possible

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Well my surgeon asked me what I was thinking of for a goal weight and I told him I didn't care the least about the number I just wanted to be healthy and I believe that is more of a feeling then a true measurement. The problem with all these weight scales is every person on the planet is different, so what works for one won't work for anyone else. My surgeon actually liked that answer and told me it was the best answer he had ever had to that question, and we have never discussed a number goal again. Now unfortunately I get asked all the time what my goal is and since I got tired of trying to explain my theory on it, I now just say I am currently shooting for under 200 lbs and when I get there I will reevaluate where to go from there. Sorry not a real answer but how I feel about that.

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Thanks Laura. Are you happy with that decision? Would you change it before you hit it or go full steam ahead with that goal in mind?

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I was not given a number by my bariatric team. During the time when my surgeon might have meant to bring it up with me, we were busy discussing insurance throwing me a curve ball & I wasn't sure if surgery was going to happen or not.

Anyway, I decided on 160 originally based on a "normal" BMI for my height. I went down slightly to 155lbs after realizing that the large frame that I thought I had all my life might be more of a medium one. It's on the higher end of the "normal" range. I know that I'm going to have some weight hanging there as skin for a bit (maybe forever in some parts).

I don't remember how young I was when I was around that weight, but it was around elementary/middle school. My main goal? Not killing myself with diabetes & high blood pressure. Other than that.. I'd just like to be "normal" for once in my life. If I'm going to stand out.. let it be for something other than being "the fat girl".

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Richard, shooting for under 200 is an excellent goal and, I believe, has universal appeal to most sleevers. For many, including myself, that is not a number that has been seen for a long time, in a galaxy far, far way. :)

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My doctor never talked about a goal weight. My psych dr asked me what my goal was and I said 190. I thought at the time that sounded good because I wanted to be realistic. He said that was good because some people are unrealistic and can't ever reach the goal the set. But when I started loosing weight I knew I could change my goal to 170. I've reached that and now I'm thinking 160 but if I stay at 170 then I'm still happy!

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My dr just asked me where I would like to be prior to surgery & told me that I could get to whatever weight I desired with wls. In high school, at 5'10" I weighed 150-157 lbs (unfortunately, I never enjoyed it or appreciated it...I thought I had to weigh 120-125 lbs!), ...now 20 yrs later, even though I have no children, I am built very differently...the smallest I have gotten to in the past 20 yrs from time to time was 199...so I took 20 more lbs off of that...and came up with 175. I think if/when I do get to 175 - I will shoot for 165. I want to be a size 14. I want to shop on the 'other side' of stores, again. I am much more accepting of my curves & want to keep them now unlike in my early years. So, I will enjoy it & appreciate it when I get to my goal weight this time around. Good luck to all of us getting there!!

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My Surgeon asked me and i I said 145 lbs he then said 170lbs. Honestly I'd be Happy to first reach 170lbs my Surgeon's goal. Surgery 2/27/13

highest weight 267

Surgery weight 260

Current weight 208

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Andi-very good answer and has a lot of personal meaning to you. You are also able to connect a sense of peace, comfort and well being with that number. I think that is going to help you tremendously in being happy with your goal and make it more natural to maintain. Way to go at striving towards an envisioned goal of being a medium. Seeing yourself as a medium is really helpful as it will be something your subconscious can take action on, without it feeling unnatural to you because you will not be fighting it.

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My doctor never talked about a goal weight. My psych dr asked me what my goal was and I said 190. I thought at the time that sounded good because I wanted to be realistic. He said that was good because some people are unrealistic and can't ever reach the goal the set. But when I started loosing weight I knew I could change my goal to 170. I've reached that and now I'm thinking 160 but if I stay at 170 then I'm still happy!

That is great that you have set a new goal! Being adaptive is key to being happy with success despite circumstances. Thanks for sharing. I like the adaptive approach to picking a goal number because it allows room for refinement based upon the feedback loop of life.

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Thanks Laura. Are you happy with that decision? Would you change it before you hit it or go full steam ahead with that goal in mind?

You know I've actually thought about that several times recently... And I have to say I'm good with that number so it must of made sense somewhere in this screwy mind of mine.

Full steam ahead :)

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I've been wondering about this too. My doctor hasn't said anything about a goal weight so I have no clue what to aim for. Of course I have that perfect world number that seems way too far fetched but who knows. I don't know if I should just set small goals for myself or set the big final goal. I feel like if I set my own goal and don't reach it I failed. This is my first chance at being at a healthy weight in my life but the BMI weight for my age and height seem unreachable at this point.

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I am 9 1/2 months out and I originally had a number in mind that I would have been totally happy with. I made that number and have reevaluated it several times. What is funny is that at some point along the way I quit stressing over the scale number and as I became more active it became more about toning and tightening and endurance for me! I also decided instead of the scale number, more about a size for me in clothes that nine months ago I would have thought was impossible! I have about 10 lbs and 1 more size to go, but I know it will happen in the next 2 months! My doctor did tell me for my frame he wouldn't want to see me in the low normal range for my bmi but that is all he said. But of course that is because when I go in I'm one of "those people" with spreadsheets, charts and my fitness pal printouts! LOL

Sent from my iPhone using VST

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My dr just asked me where I would like to be prior to surgery & told me that I could get to whatever weight I desired with wls. In high school' date=' at 5'10" I weighed 150-157 lbs (unfortunately, I never enjoyed it or appreciated it...I thought I had to weigh 120-125 lbs!), ...now 20 yrs later, even though I have no children, I am built very differently...the smallest I have gotten to in the past 20 yrs from time to time was 199...so I took 20 more lbs off of that...and came up with 175. I think if/when I do get to 175 - I will shoot for 165. I want to be a size 14. I want to shop on the 'other side' of stores, again. I am much more accepting of my curves & want to keep them now unlike in my early years. So, I will enjoy it & appreciate it when I get to my goal weight this time around. Good luck to all of us getting there!![/quote']

Good point about wanting to keep certain physical qualities of your body. The women like their curves and the men like their muscles. And both sexes have an appreciation of those qualities on the opposite sex. It is the way we were intended to look. No one should feel compelled and the need to go off the deep end and become skinny to the tune of n eating disorder. WLS is a tool to help us get healthy and happy. Both go hand in hand.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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