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Ever feel all cute.. And then...



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You see yourself in a mirror, naked, in jeans, etc. ?

Ugh. So I'm only 6 weeks out. I've lost 29 lbs. I feel good about that and sometimes feel like I look thinner. And then no one days anything about my weight and I wonder if its really not. I've lost maybe 2 pant sizes, not sure as I wear yoga pants ATM and thy streeeeetch when you're really fat. Lol but the jeans I haven't worn in over 2 years finally for w a little finger room in the band, so....

Anyway then there are days I feel super fat. I see myself naked and wonder why I was feeling all good about myself. Sigh.

Do you do this? Hard to explain and I'm super tired and going to nap.

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Oh yes! I do this all the time! Soem times i feel like i'm looking so good and slim, and then i look in the mirror naked,or with the wrong clothes on, and it's like, OMG! I look awful! I don't look like i've lost ANY weight ( i've lost about 27lbs). I know i have, because i can fit into clothes that i couldn't even come close to fitting into before, but i still feel super fat. Everyone says i'm looking good, but i guess i just don't see it all the time. You are not alone!!

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Yes. Every once in awhile I find a very unfriendly mirror and my heart sinks. I just keep on plugging my way ... To a nicer mirror ;)

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Down 75 lbs and I still feel that way.

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To a nicer mirror. Lol

This journey is so full of ups and downs and surprises and finding out things about ourselves we never knew, triumphs, face-plants, etc. this isn't even a negative post, it's just a part of the journey. I'm LOVING the journey, but there are little bugs that I'd like to squash.

Like today I finally figured the recipe and nut info for the homemade Protein balls here on vst. I'd been figuring them at 100 a pop for about 2 weeks. They were 121 each. There were days that I ate 4 throughout the day. That's 80 calories more than I thought I was eating. Learned a valuable lesson.

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You see yourself in a mirror' date=' naked, in jeans, etc. ?

.[/quote']

Umm at least once a day! :P one of those pesky down falls of being a woman (and self-critical)

On those days I usually grabbed something that I wore before surgery and wore it so when I saw myself in the mirror I looked like I was smaller.

And had some "big persons" clothes on

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I almost cried last week. I have lost 53lbs since surgery 1/15 & 67lbs all together with pre op. sounds impressive right? I think so. So I've never really cared what anyone thinks when I wear a bathing suit. If I wanna swim, I'm doing it. If ppl think I look fat oh well, I don't care. Hooooowever, after losing this much weight I have been feeling really good. I put on my bathing suit that was way too tight before surgery and it fit nicely maybe even a tad big! I was jumping with joy. So my step daughter really wanted me to take her to the YMCA to swim. They have a huge indoor pool with a massive slide. When we got there, there were a ton of little kids aged 3-5 in the pool area. My step daughter had to use the restroom so I stood waiting for her. Well some of the little kids had just finished getting dressed after swimming and were standing in line waiting to leave. It was then that I heard a little girl go, " hey look at that big fat lady! Hi big fat lady!" It took everything for me not to turn to the little girl and tell her to f@&k off. I didn't know how to handle it. All I know is I was feeling great and all it took was for that little brat to say something so rude to bring me down to zero. I'm over it now. In hindsight I should've just told her she was being rude and let it be but I was so crushed at the moment I didn't say anything.

It's one thing to look in the mirror and think you look good with your current weight loss, but it's another when someone no matter what age reminds you just how far you still have to go.

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MrsG, so sorry you went thru that--really, the little girl's parents are to blame for that comment. I really hope someone corrected her or asked her to apologize, but it sounds like they didn't. And remember, she is 5--so her perception of BFL probably isn't an accurate one. Keep up the great work!!!!!!!!

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I almost cried last week. I have lost 53lbs since surgery 1/15 & 67lbs all together with pre op. sounds impressive right? I think so. So I've never really cared what anyone thinks when I wear a bathing suit. If I wanna swim' date=' I'm doing it. If ppl think I look fat oh well, I don't care. Hooooowever, after losing this much weight I have been feeling really good. I put on my bathing suit that was way too tight before surgery and it fit nicely maybe even a tad big! I was jumping with joy. So my step daughter really wanted me to take her to the YMCA to swim. They have a huge indoor pool with a massive slide. When we got there, there were a ton of little kids aged 3-5 in the pool area. My step daughter had to use the restroom so I stood waiting for her. Well some of the little kids had just finished getting dressed after swimming and were standing in line waiting to leave. It was then that I heard a little girl go, " hey look at that big fat lady! Hi big fat lady!" It took everything for me not to turn to the little girl and tell her to f@&k off. I didn't know how to handle it. All I know is I was feeling great and all it took was for that little brat to say something so rude to bring me down to zero. I'm over it now. In hindsight I should've just told her she was being rude and let it be but I was so crushed at the moment I didn't say anything.

It's one thing to look in the mirror and think you look good with your current weight loss, but it's another when someone no matter what age reminds you just how far you still have to go.[/quote']

Oh that had to sting!! :*(

I had a similar thing happen before surgery, a couple years ago. It takes a lot to get me in public, especially when I'm at a heavy weight. it was Christmas time and I really wanted to go to both of my daughters Christmas parties at school. I went and my daughter who was in 2nd grade was upset. I asked her what was wrong and she confessed that a mean boy in her class had said "your mom is fat."

Broke my heart- for her and myself. I still haven't gone to a school function again. :(. Hopefully soon.

I have super low self-esteem. Working on it.

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I almost cried last week. I have lost 53lbs since surgery 1/15 & 67lbs all together with pre op. sounds impressive right? I think so. So I've never really cared what anyone thinks when I wear a bathing suit. If I wanna swim, I'm doing it. If ppl think I look fat oh well, I don't care. Hooooowever, after losing this much weight I have been feeling really good. I put on my bathing suit that was way too tight before surgery and it fit nicely maybe even a tad big! I was jumping with joy. So my step daughter really wanted me to take her to the YMCA to swim. They have a huge indoor pool with a massive slide. When we got there, there were a ton of little kids aged 3-5 in the pool area. My step daughter had to use the restroom so I stood waiting for her. Well some of the little kids had just finished getting dressed after swimming and were standing in line waiting to leave. It was then that I heard a little girl go, " hey look at that big fat lady! Hi big fat lady!" It took everything for me not to turn to the little girl and tell her to f@&k off. I didn't know how to handle it. All I know is I was feeling great and all it took was for that little brat to say something so rude to bring me down to zero. I'm over it now. In hindsight I should've just told her she was being rude and let it be but I was so crushed at the moment I didn't say anything.

It's one thing to look in the mirror and think you look good with your current weight loss, but it's another when someone no matter what age reminds you just how far you still have to go.

I am so sorry this happened to you. We have all had those moments. About a year ago a little girl at a birthday party whose mother I know (and who happens to be a former model turned yoga instructor, ugh) started following me around saying "Do you know you look just like a princess?" "That's sweet" I said. She went on "Do you know who princess Fiona is?" I didn't in that moment so I said "no". I noticed that her mother kept telling her to be quiet and usher her away. But she finally got it out. "Princess Fiona from Shrek! You know who she is!" I was so embarrased. I know she didn't mean anything by it but still, it hurt.

I am the same way. When I had kids I decided that my weight was the result of my poor choices and they would not suffer having a mom who didn't do things with them. So I zip-line, ride roller coasters, and yes put on my swimsuit and go to the beach, pool, or waterpark. It helps that I live in Michigan because there are a lot of overweight people walking around right along with me :). But, I always get the snide remarks. A couple of years ago I took them to Mexico and I think the guys just about fell out with laughter when I hauled my big ass up on a horse to ride on the beach with my kids! People are so rude but it is their shortcoming not ours. We're fixing our bodies but they will be likely be flawed in spirit forever.

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I think it's awful that we all have stories of people saying mean things and feeling hurt. Why do people find that that is ok? I wasn't raised that way. To me it's just mean and a way for them to feel better about themselves, with the exception of kids. They just blurt whatever and not think that it might hurt others feelings. We'll all get there eventually, it just feels like it's been and will be a long road to get there!

Keep workin on that self esteem Amy. You made a choice to love yourself enough to have surgery whether it was for you or your kids. Love yourself! You are worth it and if your not sure, just ask your daughter. I'm sure you are very worth it to her! :)

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One way to be able to see the difference is to take your picture in the same exact spot each time. Even if you have to put a tape mark on the floor for you and your picture taker. Make sure you are framing your body in a doorway, something that will give you a reference point. That way you can see yourself shrinking. Since we don't get new bodies (except after plastics of course) we still have the general body type, so we will always have the same bumps and bulges, just smaller ones!

I listened to a wonderful segment on NPR a few months back where it talked about phantom limb pain and how they used mirrors to retrain the brain to know that there was no longer a limb there. It made me think about us and our bodies, if the brain can feel an itch on an arm that is not there, why do we expect it to grasp right away that we have lost 50 lbs.... Give your brain some time to catch up with your body. ;-)

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I've lost about 83 lbs, in June I'll be three years out, maintaining for almost 2.5 years....AND my jeans are 4's and 6's. I STILL have days when i feel fat or I feel like I look fat in something I have on. The head games we play with ourselves. It's crazy and I don't know if this will ever change, but it does keep me on my toes and "aware"......still, rationally I know I'm obsessive and nuts at times!! LoL

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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