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Keeping surgery MY secret



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Having weight loss surgery was a decision my husband and I made together. For personal reasons I made the decision to keep it strictly between my husband and I. We haven't told anyone not even family. I just did not care to hear all the judgement, opinions, criticism, etc. My issue now is I have an appt with my physician for a yearly exam and also to get clearance to have surgery on my foot. I have worked in the medical profession my entire life and know how nosey office staff can be and the loose tongues some tend to have. Yes there is suppose to be patient confidentiality but let's face it if there is someone that wants to spread gossip that's not going to deter them. My ? Is this..is there any harm if I don't disclose my VSG to my physician and to the physician that is going to be doing surgery on my foot? I don't want it in my medical record for the wrong person to read and broadcast all over town. Thoughts?

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Don't they usually ask about prior surgery? I had hand surgery earlier this week and the doctor asked about previous surgeries. If foot surgery comes first then you don't have to say anything.

I decided to tell my family about my wls surgery. I thought they would all be critical and judgementle, but surprisingly they were not....not sure what they may say behind my back...lol

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The foot surgeon I wouldn't worry about, but your PCP can be a great advocate and assist in your ongoing recovery. Mine is really supportive of my decisions and has helped me a ton. I would mention to him your fears, he may not have to write anything down. On the other side of the coin, I didn't tell anyone either, but I didn't try to hide the fact either. I'm not ashamed of taking the steps I needed to gain back my health and life. I was more ashamed of my weight than I would be for taken the steps I did. I'm not one for putting my business out there, but I won't duck it either. Good luck!

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I sincerely understand your choice for keeping your wls to yourself.. But wow that's a tough question. Maybe you should ask your barbaric doc and then it probably depends on how long between surgeries as to what he will advise.

I'm interested in the answer also.

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I had a question like that arise, and I basically spent 100$ out of pocket, and consulted another doctor outside of my medical group and said "would you really have needed to know that?". The answer I got was "if for any reason we had to go into your stomach, to revive, remove blockage, ANYTHING, we could have killed you without that information". I don't know, it is something to think strongly about.

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I actually worked with a girl once that would forge signatures to medical releases and fax to the hospital to obtain records on her own family members. She was very nosey and determined to find out info they chose to keep private. You know she didn't keep the info to herself either but broadcast it. She did eventually get fired. Not for that reason but it did all eventually catch up with her. I just have major issues with trust and my privacy. I am proud of my decision to have the surgery and feel better than I have ever felt but just don't feel like dealing with all the judgmental opinions from my family and others.

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Having weight loss surgery was a decision my husband and I made together. For personal reasons I made the decision to keep it strictly between my husband and I. We haven't told anyone not even family. I just did not care to hear all the judgement' date=' opinions, criticism, etc. My issue now is I have an appt with my physician for a yearly exam and also to get clearance to have surgery on my foot. I have worked in the medical profession my entire life and know how nosey office staff can be and the loose tongues some tend to have. Yes there is suppose to be patient confidentiality but let's face it if there is someone that wants to spread gossip that's not going to deter them. My ? Is this..is there any harm if I don't disclose my VSG to my physician and to the physician that is going to be doing surgery on my foot? I don't want it in my medical record for the wrong person to read and broadcast all over town. Thoughts?[/quote']

I can totally see your concern. Some people are just nosey.

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I completely understand your desire to keep this a secret. I am also a very private person and I haven't told a soul about my WLS. That being said, if you are having a surgery that requires anesthesia I think you need to let the doctor know. The reason is because after they put you out if they need to intubate you for any reason, they absolutely must know that you had vsg or they could rupture your stomach unknowingly and kill you.

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I am pretty sure you have to disclose all previous surgeries to your surgeon just in-case something happens to you. I'm sure you figure your stomach has nothing to do with your foot but I'm sure there are freak occurrences where something has happened and they need that info.

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I totally respect your decision. I wouldn't tell any dr unless it was a danger to your life; I know what you mean about medical staff who tell all they know. All those HIPPA forms do not help in reality.

I am not telling anyone, period. My friends, workplace & neighbors knew I had to be off for a surgery, but I gave no details on what. It is NO one's business what I do with my body. I know my family would have a cow if they knew I had done this & gone through the past week without them to help me. (I am one week out!)

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Talk to your surgeon and tell him your concerns. He needs to know your surgical history. When you go under anesthesia there are many devices they use to maintain your breathing, not always intubation. Most commonly they use a device called an LMA and it goes into your esophagus. If any issues arise your stomach is near by and may take the brunt of it (I don't want to go into details so as to not scare anyone unnecessarily) They definitely need to know about your sleeve. They also need to know how you have handled anesthesia. I completely understand wanting to keep it private, my hubby is the only one that knows about my sleeve.

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The reason is because after they put you out if they need to intubate you for any reason' date=' they absolutely must know that you had vsg or they could rupture your stomach unknowingly and kill you.[/quote']

Intubation goes down the trachea not the oesophagus.

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I would tell all my doctors. If it was spread around I would hire a lawyer. hippa laws are in place for this reason. What if you have a complication during surgery. If they run a blind tube they could kill you.

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I understand not wanting anyone but your husband to know, but please tell your doctors!! There are so many different things that could go wrong during any surgery and since we're not doctors we really can't decide if being sleeved would be a factor. And with your primary doctor, its important that they have your full medical history so they can properly diagnose any health concerns that come up! When you tell your doctor and surgeon just express to them how private you have been about this. There may be a way for them to notate your chart that the staff wouldn't even have access to it.

But please, for your safety, tell your doctors!!!

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Having weight loss surgery was a decision my husband and I made together. For personal reasons I made the decision to keep it strictly between my husband and I. We haven't told anyone not even family. I just did not care to hear all the judgement' date=' opinions, criticism, etc. My issue now is I have an appt with my physician for a yearly exam and also to get clearance to have surgery on my foot. I have worked in the medical profession my entire life and know how nosey office staff can be and the loose tongues some tend to have. Yes there is suppose to be patient confidentiality but let's face it if there is someone that wants to spread gossip that's not going to deter them. My ? Is this..is there any harm if I don't disclose my VSG to my physician and to the physician that is going to be doing surgery on my foot? I don't want it in my medical record for the wrong person to read and broadcast all over town. Thoughts?[/quote']

I had my sleeve done on feb 19th this yr and today in fact I had a d &c done I told my doc about the vsg and he was like oh ok and acted like no big deal bit when the Anastasia guy cam in I told him and he was like omg thank god u told me and noted in bold print ! So tell your doc if not doc then the Ana people

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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