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French fry purgetory

I was running late to a dr appt and starving so I swung through the Wendy's drive through. (So glad I rushed to get here as now I wrote this sitting in the waiting room with 15 other people waiting almost an hour ugh). But old habits for hard and I ordered enough food for two people (just for myself). As I mowed down on my spicy chicken sandwich and Jr. bacon cheeseburger, I cowered down low in my car so that no one would see my guilty bingeing as I have done so many times before. I told myself, surgery is a little over a month away so this is one of the last few times I can do this. I told myself, even though I'm binging, try not to drink the giant sprite as your doing do. Then as a gulped the giant sprite a mere menus later, I told myself, ok but tomorrow you really need to start practicing that. And mid bite (really mid shoving a handful of frenchfries down my throat) I had a moment of clarity as I thought to myself "no really, you can't do this once you have surgery. You CAN'T. This will not be a possibility." And it was a feeling of relief that soon, I won't be ABLE to partake in these poor habits, sometimes habits of convince but more often moments of guilty bingeing. And I could almost cry in that moment. I know that this surgery is a tool and my success is based on my will power, good choices and planning ahead. But I also know that I physically won't be able to shove a number 2 extra large value meal into my new sleeve and from what I'm reading I won't WANT to. And THAT is a wonderful feeling.

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You are so right! I see people eat food now & I think "wow, I could never eat all that" then I smile...cause I LOVE it!!

Oh man, this brought back so many memories! I'm only four months out and have absolutely no desire to do that when it was something I'd do on the regular. Be excited for your new life coming soon!

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