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Feel like im losing my mind



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Hey all!

I'm 3 weeks post op today, from band to sleeve revision. I really did not work on my bad habits of drinking alcohol before surgery. Now at 3 weeks out, I'm feeling great, and I'm dying for a glass of wine. Since I can't have wine, then I'm grabbing a piece of dark choc. If I don't have that I'm reaching for my leftover pain meds. I'm feel like I'm controlling these urges but they are coming on stronger. This is only at night too, that was my nightly routine, after 5, glass of wine. I have a very addictive personality obviously, and I'm worried. I don't want to talk about this to my surgeon bc I already feel like she looks at me as a failure bc of the Lapland. I'm sorry for rambling or if this is even making sense. It's so hard to not fall back into old routines when you start feeling back to normal.

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Addiction is addiction... It's hard. It's hard when you give up everything. A lot of us have addictive personalities... That's what got us here in the first place. I'm no saint. Just be careful. Talking about it helps and so does realizing it's an addiction... Be it food, alcohol, or anything. Hopefully you can find another healthy outlet for it. I would recommend talking to a professional. Not what I wanted to hear, but has really helped me. Best wishes!! And know that there are plenty of us that feel your pain!!

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Did your surgeon make you go through a psych eval before surgery? Mine makes you see a therapist to make sure your ready for the surgery. There has to be a reason why your having these addictive behaviors and a way to get help. I'm praying you get the help you need.

The only failure is giving up!

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yeah but he's my regular therapist, and I come to find out he's a nightly drinker too, lol, so he's no help.

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You just have to finf healthier vices. I had a friend of mine that turned into an avid runner and she never was! She was seriously lazy! lol! I used to drink a lot socially and I got into weight-lifting. i enjoyed it, it was a stress reliever and I would end up skipping happy hour. Seriously, you need to find something to do that you enjoy and can do on a regular basis to take your mind off of those things. Regardless of what our therapists do, they should never advise you to do things you don't want to do/want to change or should not do. They're human, but should be able to identify addictive personalities and the like. They're also there to offer guidance and advice. If that's not what you're getting out of therapy, then perhaps it's time to seek out another one(just saying) I love these forums for the objective advice and experiences from others that have been there and done that. I certainly wish you the best and hopefully you'll be able to work through what you need. Is there a support group through your surgeon's office? They may be able to help, too! Good luck.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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