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So this week I decided I wanted to start seeing a therapist, but I am afraid. I am afraid of being judged and don't know what to expect.

A little bit about what I want to look into.

1. Of course vsg surgery

2. I am addicted to food and cannot control my eating

3. My husband has been diagnosed with cancer this past 2 weeks

4. I get upset really easily and cry when I am angry

These are just a few but I am really scared.

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Therapy is scarey for many people. It's about sharing your most vulnerable stuff. you can do this, you need some coping skills to make it through your daily stressors. So sad your hubby was diagnosed with cancer. That alone is a scarey journey. Just go in and and take 1 thing at a time. :)

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The therapist that I spoke with pre surgery was the coolest woman ever... We sat and talked about everything and there was no judgement... She was full of answers to my questions and they are more equipped to handle what we think than we are LOL... I don't tell a lot of my life story to anyone, but with her? It was easy and I felt a lot better about my decision after talking to her...

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I also just began therapy. As a general rule, I've never been a fan of therapy, but that's my own personal opinion. There is no reason to be scared- the therapist is there to listen and provide an unbiased third party insight- not judge or make you feel bad or weird about the things you may be feeling.

As much as I don't like therapy, I have to admit that sometimes it feels good to just let my hair down and curse and cry and just let it all out. My biggest problem is leaving the office with puffy crying eyes after I'm done with a session. It's like I just walk in the office and start bawling, LOL. I say go for it. It will be beneficial after the surgery and for life in general. Good Luck!!

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I think at times in our life when everything becomes overwhelming there is nothing at all to be ashamed of to look for help. Therapists are just another expert we visit that has insight to what is going on with us. If you were the one who was sick , you would go to a specialist. Same thing. Tackling these issues before the become too much for one person to handle is a very smart way to go about it. None of us walk in another's shoes. So no one should judge what they do not live every day.

Good luck! You have found an outlet here.

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I too have my own reasons for not liking the idea of "therapy", but i am hoping to work on things and get some help. I have come to realize, by my huge weight gain in the last 2 years, I have some issues to fix. Gastric sleeve will only get me so far. Thank you for the great guidance!

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I firmly believe in therapy, especially for those of us who seek out WLS! There's no point in having this surgery without doing the head work, too. We all have some issue surrounding food or we wouldn't be obese. A therapist is trained to help us identify and deal with those issues.

IMO, some follow-up therapy also helps us deal with the mental aspects of losing weight so quickly, with the rapidly changing body image, and with the "crazy" that goes with this whole journey (i.e. not seeing the changes, missing food, dealing with other people's opinions of our weight loss, and dealing with the increased attention from the opposite sex).

Good luck!!

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B T R M - therapy is the best thing I ever did for myself. I was struggling with my weight, my husband, myself and my son was going off to war. I had had enough so I called and went in. I thought going in-what could she possibly say to make my miserable life worth it. I was amazed. What a difference it made. She taught me to focus on myself and put me first. I went in with the attitude that if I didn't like it I wouldn't go back. I went every two weeks and I am on top of the world. My relationship couldn't be better and my next step in thinking about myself is WLS.

Try it and you really don't like it don't go back.good luck to you.

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Don't worry about being judged... and let your therapist know that this is something you worry about. It is definitely a common thought, and something that is commonly worked on in therapy. Just make sure you pick someone you are comfortable talking to, or you might not be able to fully work out your issues. There's a site (therapists.psychologytoday.com) that has profiles of therapists (you can search by location) and it identifies a lot of aspects of their therapy styles (specialties, issues they are open to working on, treatment approaches, modalities, client focus) in addition to free text about them, their practice, etc. I just started therapy again and I found the site helpful in trying to find a therapist.

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      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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