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How Do I Stay Positive?



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In general I usually feel excited. But right now I am feeling quite anxious. Wondering if I am making the right choice, scared of the unknown, and I know the night before surgery and the day of I am going to be having huge panic attacks. Does anyone else feel this way? If so, how do you cope? How do you stay positive and motivated about surgery? How do you make the fear go away? How can I become more strong?

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Hi, Irish1988. I am the same way. Unless you stay doped up until after surgery, the fear and panic won't go away. Boy, I'm a big box of fun, huh? Honestly, though, when you are being prepped, they will give you a sedative and you'll finally feel much better!

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I stayed positive about the surgery by being negative about the health consequences of not having it.

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I'm on the same boat:( my date is 10/10

Sent from my ADR6400L using VST

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I agree with the others. Focus on the outcome (new life) and just get through the surgery process as best you can, positive or not. I think accepting that you're scared and giving yourself permission to be scared might help. I think you might feel a little more in control accepting yourself right now however you may feel right now.

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For me it was prayer and a good wife.

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It's normal to be scared just remember why you are having the surgery. I was scared before my surgery and kept thinking what if I'm that person that doesn't make it and I leave my child without a parent, I even cried while I was being prepped for surgery. My doctor promised me I'd be fine and he was right.

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I'm due to have my surgery in December 2012. I'm on a emotional rollercoaster. One day I'm all brave and I can do this..the next day I'm scared to death. One day I want to tell everyone about having surgery and the next day I want everyone to mind their own business. I hope I can calm down somewhat in the future. I admit I am a person that likes to be prepared..it gives me control..and planning for surgery helps me some. Like researching my Protein Shakes and meals etc

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I think it's really normal to feel this way, I know I do. Up until this point surgery was always something I was working toward & "a long time away" but now that my surgery date is fast approaching I'm on an emotional roller coaster. I pray a lot & I focus on getting everything I will need from pre-op to post-op. I even went and got some of that dry Shampoo so my hair will be clean while I'm in the hospital lol. I also keep in my mind that I'm not health or happy with myself now but this surgery gives me hope that I will be some day soon.

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I feel the same way. Getting this surgery has made me confront alot of things about myself. I am terrified of surgery also. I am going to ask my doctor for some zoloft or something because I am starting to get depressed. I had an abnormal EKG, but the doctor says I was showing low voltage and that I would be ok. It's just wondering if I made the right decision. I do know, that something has to be done quickly, I want to see my daughter grow up!

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It is normal to be afraid. It is all unknown to us. I was crazy scared for awhile and then I had peace about it. I was not really scared the day of surgery ( only of the IV ), it was much easier than I ever expected. I had very little pain and no nausea. I am two months out now, have healed very well and am beginning to feel normal again. Do not let fear rule your life or your mind.

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I completely understand how you feel. When I was given my surgery date of a month out I was upset it was so far away. But as it get closer, I'm getting scared. I thought I was so ready. After the 6 month diet and all hoops I've been jumping through since Jan. I can't believe I feel like this. I just keep imaging my life post op and I get excited again.

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If you have read my story before, you know that I waited 15 years before having WLS. I just was not ready. But once I decided to have it - I was so committed - the excitement made the fears go away. I can tell you that I believe in WLS more than ever now that I am 4 months post op. My body is FINALLY on my side and I have a fighting chance to really lose weight and make a positive impact on my health. YOU CAN DO THIS! It's ok to be scared - but trust in this decision and in your surgeon and the hospital team. This is one of the best things you may have ever done for yourself. Change is uncomfortable. But change is good!!!!! We are all behind you. You are not alone.

"Courage is being scared to death, but saddling up anyway!" John Wayne

Saddle up, Partner! Yee Haw!!!!!

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Thank you all for your words. You guys rock. When ever I start to feel nervous or scared, you all seem to know what to say to make me feel calm again.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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