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Is Keeping The Secret Possible?



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Well by all means' date=' post away, post away. I tend not to give a negative opinion unless asked for it, but go ahead. Seems you are changing lives right here. :/[/quote']

Wow. That was really negative and snarky.

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Comment was not directed twords you. If you read through all the posts you would see why I am annoyed. Its one thing to state an opinion in a nice way as you have done. It is another thing to continue on and on amd on about your opinion and calling people liars ect.

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Well by all means, post away, post away. I tend not to give a negative opinion unless asked for it, but go ahead. Seems you are changing lives right here. :/

Look I'm not trying to criticize or judge people. Having WLS is one of the best decisions I've made in a long time, and I'm owning that decision. I'm proud of it. But I'm also troubled by this stigma surrounding the surgery. It's like admitting we're weak or need help, or we're too lazy to lose weight the old fashion way. I think the only way to improve things is by educating people who don't know anything about WLS. I'm just trying to encourage others to do the same.

But also, having WLS is no small component of my weight loss, so by keeping it a secret I feel like I am living a lie, which I can't do.

Now, I fully understand why some people want to keep their surgery a secret, but that doesn't mean I won't encourage them to speak out.

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Look I'm not trying to criticize or judge people. Having WLS is one of the best decisions I've made in a long time, and I'm owning that decision. I'm proud of it. But I'm also troubled by this stigma surrounding the surgery. It's like admitting we're weak or need help, or we're too lazy to lose weight the old fashion way. I think to the only way to improve things is by educating people who don't know anything about WLS. I'm just trying to encourage others to do the same.

But also, having WLS is no small component of my weight loss, so by keeping it a secret I feel like I am living a lie, which I can't do.

Now, I fully understand why some people want to keep their surgery a secret, but that doesn't mean I won't encourage them to speak out.

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Sorry phone doesnt like me to quote and reply.

Anywho what you just wrote felt sincere. Some of the other comments felt judgy. And considering the fact that i am thinking of keeping work in the dark i am sure you can tell im sensitive. All in all i want to scream it from the mountains but I am not strong enough for that, who knows maybe after surgery I will be.

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I disagree. Should you have to tell everyone if you have cancer? Or MS? Or depression? These are private medical issues. It's called HIPPA, and it's our right NOT to reveal anything medical, any surgeries we've had, any treatments we've undergone. If you want to tell, fine, but some people are more comfortable dealing with cancer in private. It's not anybody's business what I had done. And I AM eating healthfully and exercising. I'll have to for the rest of my life.

Comparing weight loss surgery to cancer? Cancer isn't something you choose to get. If a fat person came up to me and I said I lost the weight through diet and working out...really? Obviously the only people we should be lying to is the Military because they won't let you in. Other than that...people lie about cancer or don't disclose the illness because they are in fear of getting fired or just in fear of cancer itself. They are in fear of discrimination. I mean is weight loss surgery really that serious? I believe most fat people live in a constant state of feeling discriminated against, which pretty much is true...so maybe most people are still afraid of discrimination and of what others might think because they have been the victim of weightism for so long. I tell everyone. You don't have to, but I wouldn't lie to another obese person. The Bottom Line is only 5% of people that lose the weight keep it off. Surgery, for now, is really the only chance at staying at healthy weight for a long period of time or for forever. I just couldn't lie to someone...unless I was playing survivor for one million dollars. For that one I would have to say...the grapefruit diet. I am not trying to argue or push my point across to anyone. We all do our own thing and that is cool. I just don't care what people think about my choice and I can't seem to grasp why anyone cares anyway.

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I also really love the fact that I am a former fat girl turned super model! My issues of low self-esteem contributed to my need to compare myself to skinnier women. Why can't I be that size? Why can't my legs look like that? Why do I have a muffin top? I mean it is a big problem for me. I know alot of fat people do this. So I would feel so super awesome to have someone look at me and think...I wish I was skinny like her and then I would get to say...YOU CAN BE SKINNY! YOU CAN BE THIN! YOU CAN BE HEALTHY! I WAS YOU! I AM YOU! AND YOU ARE ME! I want to tell everyone. I am so glad that I don't give McDonald's & Taco Bell my money anymore...I am so glad that no one is now profiting from my obesity. I was a regular customer to the McDouble Crack House. I want to tell Coke and Pepsi to shove their sugary drinks up their wazoo. We are proponents of change and really some of the strongest people to make this decision. Most people are not making this decision. I feel like not telling your story is doing a disservice to the one person that maybe needs to hear it.

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Sorry phone doesnt like me to quote and reply.

Anywho what you just wrote felt sincere. Some of the other comments felt judgy. And considering the fact that i am thinking of keeping work in the dark i am sure you can tell im sensitive. All in all i want to scream it from the mountains but I am not strong enough for that, who knows maybe after surgery I will be.

You will be!

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Not only didn't I tell my work (took vacation time) I didn't tell anyone but my husband, my sister (who was sleeved the same day) and my sisters husband. I went to Mexico and everyone thinks I was in San Diego on vacation. I'm 3 months post op, down 42 lbs, and just tell anyone who asks, I'm counting calories and exercising (true).

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I am probably feeling a little I LOVE THE SLEEVE TODAY! I fit into a size 8 dress!

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I am probably feeling a little I LOVE THE SLEEVE TODAY! I fit into a size 8 dress!

Go you. I'm loving mine too. Lost my first 50 lbs.

But what you said hit the nail on the head for me. I considered having WLS for many years, but never acted on it because of all the misinformation out there. People still believe (as I did) that the mortality rate for WLS is somewhere between 1% and 5%. Then one day a coworker told me that he had lost 150 pounds after having bypass surgery a few years ago. I had no idea. His openness inspired me even as much as his success. If it weren't for that one simple conversation I would still be suffering with no hope of change. I hope someday I might help someone else in the same fashion.

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Sorry phone doesnt like me to quote and reply.

Anywho what you just wrote felt sincere. Some of the other comments felt judgy. And considering the fact that i am thinking of keeping work in the dark i am sure you can tell im sensitive. All in all i want to scream it from the mountains but I am not strong enough for that' date=' who knows maybe after surgery I will be.[/quote']

I will sincerely try to be less judgy. And I hope one day you do scream it from the mountain tops. Or at least find that one person who you know is struggling and tell them your story, and hopefully it gives them hope.

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YOU CAN BE SKINNY! YOU CAN BE THIN! YOU CAN BE HEALTHY! I WAS YOU! I AM YOU! AND YOU ARE ME! I want to tell everyone. I am so glad that I don't give McDonald's & Taco Bell my money anymore...I am so glad that no one is now profiting from my obesity. I was a regular customer to the McDouble Crack House. I want to tell Coke and Pepsi to shove their sugary drinks up their wazoo. We are proponents of change and really some of the strongest people to make this decision. Most people are not making this decision. I feel like not telling your story is doing a disservice to the one person that maybe needs to hear it.

I love this! This is EXACTLY how I feel! I want all of us to be open because "we" are in the minority. The majority if the obese population isn't having surgery. And no, not every obese person should get surgery. But I hate the idea of people suffering in silence due to misinformation or embarrassment. If more of us were open about our choice and refused to allow others make us feel badly for making the hard choice and taking control of our lives and our health...perhaps we could make a difference.

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To all the people who do not agree with my decision to not tell every person that I come in contact with, well who are you to judge my decision. I did not come on here and start bashing you for revealing your personal medical decision, WLS, so don't bash me. I have told the people in my life that matter the most and to everyone else, its none of their business. I am not living a lie, just choosing who to tell and who not to. Throughout my life I have had other personal medical issues and I did not choose to broadcast them either. And I am no way embarressed about having WLS. It is one of the best choices I ever made but it is MY life and I choose to live it MY way.

And to the person 'Tell who you want or don't tell, but don't try to redefine the meaning of the word LIE just so you can feel better and make everyone else here feel better. Ok here goes-

lie/lī/ a false statement made with deliberate intent to deceive; an intentional untruth; a falsehood.

I am not redefining the word lie to make myself feel better. It is bully people like you who bully others into having to think like you. Last time I looked this is a free country for all to live their lives the way they want.

I have not made any false statements or intended to deceive anyone or intentionally told non-truth information. I just do not give the personal details to people who I feel have no business knowing my personal life.

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Comparing weight loss surgery to cancer? Cancer isn't something you choose to get. If a fat person came up to me and I said I lost the weight through diet and working out...really? Obviously the only people we should be lying to is the Military because they won't let you in. Other than that...people lie about cancer or don't disclose the illness because they are in fear of getting fired or just in fear of cancer itself. They are in fear of discrimination. I mean is weight loss surgery really that serious? I believe most fat people live in a constant state of feeling discriminated against' date=' which pretty much is true...so maybe most people are still afraid of discrimination and of what others might think because they have been the victim of weightism for so long. I tell everyone. You don't have to, but I wouldn't lie to another obese person. The Bottom Line is only 5% of people that lose the weight keep it off. Surgery, for now, is really the only chance at staying at healthy weight for a long period of time or for forever. I just couldn't lie to someone...unless I was playing survivor for one million dollars. For that one I would have to say...the grapefruit diet. I am not trying to argue or push my point across to anyone. We all do our own thing and that is cool. I just don't care what people think about my choice and I can't seem to grasp why anyone cares anyway.[/quote']

As much as I love your quote, most cancer is preventable. Smoking, pollution, living near power plants, working in a popcorn factory, living and working around mold, microwave foods, sugar free agents and a bunch of other things cause cancer. Just like obesity, our environment has changed from when we use to run around and chase our food or pick our food. Most of us work behind a desk, have fast paced lives and/or eat all the good tasting foods of the world. Cancer and Obesity is no one's fault, just the nature of our environment.

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