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Hi all. So I'm doing my sleep study tonight and start my pre open diet next week, but today I had a massive uncontrollable crying fit feeling like I'd brought all this on myself. It could've been avoided and I didn't work hard enough. Anyone else felt pre surgery guilt?

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Maybe not feelings of guilt as much as fear! Fear caused me to continually doubt the necessity of the surgery. I had to stay focused on the end result and not allow myself to get in the way of making the best decision for my life! I knew once it was all over I would be better than ever and 4 weeks post op tomorrow, better I am! You hang in there! No doubts! You will definitely be glad you did!

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To a certain extent, we all brought it on ourselves. The important part though is realizing that you can get out of it and this is your chance to do so. I think many of us have those little voices in our heads telling us this is the easy way out - it's not - it's the only way out. I hope you stick with your decision. I'm pre-op too and quite a bit nervous about what I've got myself into but I know without a doubt it's the right choice. You can do it girl!! :)

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Thank you. I know that this is for my betterment just wondering if anyone understood. I love this site it really helps to have support.

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The day I got my surgery date I cried because I felt llike a failure that I couldn't lose the weight the "normal" way. Since then I have actually lost over 25lbs on my Dr's low carb pre-op diet. The voice in my head started to tell me that maybe I could do it on my own. But, standing in the grocery store cracker aisle I know in my heart of hearts without the goal of surgery I would be gorging myself on a big box of chicken in a Bisquit. At this point, failure for me would be to not go through with the surgery and stay as I am.

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The heck with guilt! Negativity is not a helpful tool for your success, it just drags you down and makes you feel bad.

You know, we do all have a personal responsibility for the choices we make, HOWEVER, when you are morbidly obese there are metabolic issues at work here. They drive you to EAT and to hang onto the weight no matter how strong your willpower. No matter how you got to this weight, your odds of losing and keeping off large amounts of weight are really small - like 5% or less - without the surgery. It is a tool, don't feel guilty, feel THANKFUL that it is available for us. I for one feel truly blessed to have this opportunity.

And don't for one minute think that it is "the easy way out". There isn't anything easy about it, and frankly it takes work and some sacrifices, but I view it as "the only way out." I have gushed on about this many times on this forum, but I can't even begin to express how joyful, thankful and excited I am to regaining the body and health that I deserve to have. All the surgical scars, loose skin and Protein drinks are nothing compared to the joy I feel when I can gallop my horse again, or go for a 3 hour hike with my 20 year old son or just fit comfortably in an airplane seat. This is living the dream!

Tell me now, which lady looks more comfortable and enjoying her life???

P1020595.jpg

After 85+ pounds lost:

2012-05-28132344.jpg

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Thank you Jane. That is the bottom line. I'm ready to live! Your words touched home.

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CowgirlJane,

The lady in the baggy pants looks like the one more comfortable and enjoying life! Hooray for baggy pants!! (I now have the world's largest collection of black stretch knit baggy pants - formerly the world's largest collection of black stretch knit tight pants!).

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Jane - where are you located? I'm in the Lynnwood/Bothell area. I use to have horses too and one of the things I hope to do when I lose weight is get back to riding... I sure miss it!

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I agree with Karen, if not for looking forward to the surgery I'd be in the cookie isle getting chips ahoy chocolate chunk cookies....or in the ice cream isle getting snicker ice cream bars. Of course having my boyfriend with when shopping helps....he pulls me away....lol. Now, with less than a month to go I barely think about those foods, THANK GOD! But yes, I do have moments where I think i'm a failure for not doing this on my own. for asking myself if there's something wrong with me because my family is so opposed to this. But I just remind myself why i'm doing this and it passes.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
      · 0 replies
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    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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