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The Downside Of Weight Loss..



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I get angry because people treat you different when you are a certain size. When I was 250 lbs I would wait all day to cross the street now at a smoking 185, size 8 with curves and looking HOT!!! the cars stop and let me cross. I am a frequent gym goer and guys now open doors and flirt. I find it insulting and find myself angry at the discrimination but what can I do. I take it in stride and enjoy the new me.

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Everything in life is a trade-off. We all arrive at today as a result of millions of choices we've made over the course of our lives. Most are obvious, one doesn't wander out into traffic but it's still a choice.

When we choose to have WLS we are making a trade, a very serious trade. There are things we'll leave behind. No more binges of Cookies or ice cream, no more coffee and sweet roll breakfasts, etc. The benefits of the trade are phenomenal however, no more high blood pressure, no more diabetes, extension of life by decades and a better quality of life.

I've been at both the top and the bottom of the weight roller coaster before but never minded the fact that I had to get smaller clothes, shoes, etc. Clothes and shoes wear out anyhow so sooner or later you'll be buying replacements.

As far as people not liking you for you instead of because of your weight, entirely true but also true for the segment of society that have always been normal in weight. There will always be people that don't like you and their stated reasons may or may not be the real reasons. There are people that just don't like you. It's something we all have to deal with and not having weight as a scapegoat forces us to deal the issue.

In my late teens and into my early twenties I had to adjust to a new, more slender, body image. I'm sure that I left a few people puzzled by my responses at times. I was so used to being put down for being obese that even when I was fairly slender I tended to evaluate much of what was said to me as criticism even when it wasn't. When legitimate criticism came my way I found myself defensive because for so many years I had been criticized and teased for my weight. It took years to overcome but eventually I did.

Now, with the weight coming back over the last 20 years or so I'm not eager to revert to my earlier self image. I miss the confidence I had in my slender years and look forward to going back to that state of affairs.

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Bella, I get that you were just REPOSTING something from someone else and that wasnt all your feelings :/ Anyway, I think everyone will have their own issues with a big weight loss. I was surprised to hear your feet get smaller, lol. I'd much rather see it lost in my butt than my feet! I think it was a great repost to see what other people are thinking after their surgeries. Thats the whole point of this forum, to share our own personal experiences and concerns. Personally I've gotten a lot of reassurance from people on here further along than I am. That thing about husbands rang familiar to me. My friend had a RNY 6 yrs ago and she ended up getting divorced a few yrs later. She told me after I had mine that she read somewhere WLS people have something like a 80% chance of getting divorced after for one reason or another related to either persons feeling on the weight loss. In her case, she thought she had settled for a long time and didnt feel like she had to anymore. LIke when youre heavy you need to settle.....? I cant wait til Im a size 10 pushing a stroller out a store door to see if any man will hold the door open for me, cause they sure dont now, lol!

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This too shall pass.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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