Hi all -

I am soon to be sleeved and wondering what kinds of experiences, positive or negative, you have had along your journey in your relationships with your spouse or significant other. I have been with my husband for 16 years and married for almost 10 of those. We have 3 great kiddos and a good marriage. I don't really have reason to believe we will begin to have problems as I lose weight but I am not naive enough to think that it won't affect our relationship and everyday life when I start to lose lots of weight quickly. He is extremely supportive of my surgery and not negative about it in any way. I know he is REALLY hoping that my sex drive will increase exponentially as it has reeeeeeaaaaallly decreased in the last few years with 3 small kids to care for, a small business that I run and my self image being horrible because of my weight. To be honest, I am hoping for the same thing as I WANT to want to.....I just usually don't feel like it.

So I guess I am just wanting to know things like - Did your sex life improve a little, a lot or not at all after surgery?......Was your s/o supportive of your journey consistently?.......Did you find that your relationship dynamic changed once you lost a significant amount of weight?

Also, how has your treatment by other people changed since you began your journey and lost a noticeable amount of weight? People tend to treat those who are obese badly. How differently do people treat you once you are thinner and who have you mostly noticed this with? Coworkers? Friends? Family members?

Tell me your stories!

One thing that I can say is that things are getting better for the mostpart - 5 steps forward, 1 step back type of thing. With the surgery, my husband has seen incisions, etc. He knows I'm not capable of lifting things etc. With my previous illness, there were no scars, there were just limitations brought on by illness that he couldn't comprehend. This has led to me having a bit easier time of explaining things and him meeting some expectations of picking up some slack that I can't do yet. We laugh a lot more. He sticks his foot in his mouth a lot, but he's always done that - and its easier to let that go now, that's for sure.

Because I feel like I'm getting back to being my old self, he feels that too- and our relationship is getting better than it has been in years.

I been married for 10 years and pretty much the same weight for 10 years, dh loves me for who I am and my weight never really bothered him. Me feeling miserable about myself has, that is why he agreed to this surgery in the first place, because even though he didn't want me to do it or thought I need to do it, he knew how much it meant to me. But now we are fighting about it because I am loosing very slow 33 lbs in 3 months and with the doc telling me that is failure, that is making me very depressed, so now dh is regretting even agreeing to it in the first place because it hasn't brought me the happiness we all thought it would and I mentioned the other day I am going to look into switching to an RNY after a couple months if this doesn't work and he is even more mad and upset. So that has been the bad oh and the fact I have lost a lot of boob and bootie, which he loved lol.

I been married for 10 years and pretty much the same weight for 10 years, dh loves me for who I am and my weight never really bothered him. Me feeling miserable about myself has, that is why he agreed to this surgery in the first place, because even though he didn't want me to do it or thought I need to do it, he knew how much it meant to me. But now we are fighting about it because I am loosing very slow 33 lbs in 3 months and with the doc telling me that is failure, that is making me very depressed, so now dh is regretting even agreeing to it in the first place because it hasn't brought me the happiness we all thought it would and I mentioned the other day I am going to look into switching to an RNY after a couple months if this doesn't work and he is even more mad and upset. So that has been the bad oh and the fact I have lost a lot of boob and bootie, which he loved lol.

let me ask you - how much weight were you losing each month before the sleeve? Right now, you're losing 11 lbs per month - that is NOT A FAILURE. Any loss is a success! Your doctor isn't a specialist on weight loss surgery so he doesn't have the right to tell you that you're failing - secondly, the only way to fail at wls surgery is to GAIN weight.

Your hubby needs a little talking to! Maybe you'd be able to lose faster if he werent' stressing you out, causing extra cortisol in your system!

More sex. YAY!!!!

Seriously, I didn't feel into it. My husband always was, even at my heaviest. Now we are having some fun.

TMI?

I am also less "invisible" to others.