Post Date: 1/1/12 10:03 pm

Hi Everyone,

How do you telling your family you want to go ahead and have weight loss surgery? You have done all your research and you know for sure that you want to have this done. One of the things I have learned is that sometimes telling our family that we are going to have weight loss surgery is disastrous. Here are some things I want you to consider. Have you ever talked to them before now about having weight loss surgery? How educated are they about the kind of WLS that you want? If they know something, this is a time to educate them a little more. Go to some of the WLS Web Sites and print out some of their excellent information they have about the kind of WLS you are going to have. Have they put down for being fat? Do you think they will support you for your choice? If you feel you are not going to get their support and they are just going to put you down or set up road blocks then it might not be wise to tell them. Sometimes after you return home and they see you are healthy, alive and doing well and losing weight, this might be the time to talk to them about what you have done. Ask them for their support.

I want you to always remember this: THIS IS ALL ABOUT YOU AND NO ONE ELSE. You do not owe anyone an explanation about what you are doing or why this is your choice. You have earned the right to do what is best for you. For so many years you have not done that. Unless they have had weight problems they will almost never understand why you are having the surgery.

For various reasons, people will try to stop you. They are sure you will not be successful and you are throwing away your money. They are fat and want you to be fat just like them. They are scared you may find someone else if it is your husband or wife who is opposed to you doing this. They are jealous that you are doing this and they are not doing anything to help themselves. They are just plain scared and don't know how to communicate their feelings to you. They know very little about WLS, ONLY the BAD things that they have heard through gossip. If it is a money issue and they don't think you can afford to do this. Hey we make car payments and never think twice about it. How about making some body payments?

For so many of our family member they are so uneducated about the current methods of WLS-the sleeve being the one I am thinking of. They assume we are having lapband or bypass surgery—neither one of these were my choice. So every chance I have I try to educated anyone who wants to know about the sleeve on how successful this surgery is and just how they do it.

So, my suggestion is you know your family better than I do, so consider if it is wise to talk with them or to just keep it to yourself. There is so much support on this board for you if you need anyone to talk to or help. I am always here if you have any questions.

Suzanne

Sleeved 10/21/2008

I personally I did not tell my family until after surgery and I was past recovery. Of course my immediate family knew (those who lived in my house) but any family outside of that did not know until months later. I did not want to deal with them asking questions, voicing concerns, or them worrying.

Hi,

I think this is a very individual thing, and you know your family better than any of us. I also told everyone that I thought I should tell. I had a very bad reaction from my son--the one I thought would be very supportive. After awhile he did come around--he still will never talk with be about it or comment on the fact that I lost 105 pounds. Everyone else was just great. I think having a lot of bad information and gossip are what people get scared of. The lack of of good information and just how much better WLS is now days. I am happy for you.

Hugs,

Suzanne

I told my family and friends when I Decided to do the surgery. Even before any of my preop appointments. I got every reaction in the book and it took a while to gain the support of some pretty important people in my life. Now everyone knows, and as I get closer to submitting to insurance (this month) I am getting more nervous - but I don't have to worry about hiding anything and I have the support I need. Being honest can be hard but it pays off in the long run!

Hi,

You are a very smart young lady to handle and deal with it this way. Being honest has paid off for you. I am thrilled that you have this kind of support. I wish you luck with submitting your paper work to your insurance company.

Hugs,

Suzanne