So I posted this on another forum in a thread. It felt so good writing it down that I knew I wanted to continue to tell. (I'm sure my therapist will be thrilled!)

I'm a high school music teacher and pretty close with most of my students. I am opting not to tell my students anything, "I'm just going to disappear for a week before Christmas break" The only reason I am not yelling about this amazing tool to my students from the roof top is... At the end of Oct, one of my student's parents passed away unexpectedly from a Pulmonary Embolism (PE) from routine knee surgery. To say this was a hard experience is putting it lightly. Many of the students in all of my choirs went to the wake and even sang a song we sang last year at the funeral. At the last minute when the students' family couldn't find someone to sing the mass, I stepped in. Anyway a majority of my students are now freaked out from even the topic of surgery not to mention that most of them know I am a survivor of a PE.

So anyway, long story short I'm keeping my lips sealed for now because I don't want to freak out any of my students. As far as my coworkers, I've told two people (one my best friend and another I'm close too) that I'm having weight loss surgery. My best friend has been amazing. She's the beautiful girl who wears a size six that had me be a bridesmaid in her wedding in the summer even though I wore a size 22 dress in it! She's stood behind me with everything. My husband is deployed right now, if he doesn't make it home before the surgery she's offered to move in with me for a week to help out with my six year old daughter. And she's helped me pick out little rewards along the way AND we have committed to taking a trip together once I reach my goal! I've also told two of my principals that I was going to have some 'personal' surgery. I really think the principal that i'm really close too figured it out but he's keeping quiet.

I've told some parents that I'm really close too just as a heads up when I 'disappear' . I've also told some close friends about the surgery. All of them say, "You don't need it you look great!" That really annoys me when people say that. I'm tired of hearing I have a pretty face and a great heart. Over the years I've been a Yo-Yo dieter. I've dropped 90 lbs one time and 65 lbs another. I'm ashamed of what I look like right now. I'm embarrassed to go back to my gym because people there knew how hard I worked before. I was in the gym 6 days a week for HOURS. So I brought a treadmill and put it in my bedroom so I can start losing a little before I go back to the gym. I'm going back to the gym, there is nothing like lifting weights are kick boxing especially after dealing with cranky and emotional teenagers all day.

Sorry for the rant but this is the first time I've admitted this to anyone besides my mom and best friend. I'm being very selective on who I tell before the surgery. But knowing me, I'm going to tell everyone after the first month or two. I know how ashamed I am to be at this weight. I know there are others out there who feel the same way. If I can inspire one person, I would do it in a heartbeat. If you've taken the time to read all of this thank you. It feels good being able to admit it and to put it in writing for all to see!

God Bless!

I am sooo battling the same thing! I've only told my immediate family, 2 supportive friends, and one coworker (after 3 glasses of wine). I trust them all, so I'm not worried about that. I'm a teacher also, and I don't know how to tell my principal. Is saying "personal surgery" info enough if I'm going to be out for a week? I'm still praying for it to fall during winter break. I know the teachers, students, and parents will start to notice, but I don't know if I want to devulge that personal info. I feel people will judge wether I hear it or not...then on the other hand, SO WHAT, it may help someone too...

BeyoncSleeve

Hi Beyonc! I'm so sorry I usually don't check this site! I haven't told my administrators what I'm having but I think they have guessed it. They have been NOTHING short of supportive. Have you gotten a date yet? Please feel me in. You can send me a private message and I'll give you my email so we can keep in touch.

PS Anyone who has responded to this I will do the same for you guys too! Thank you for your support!

Tonya