Skinny girl issues...WTH!!!!!

[LilMissDiva Irene 3,282]

What's the deal with these jealous competitive freak a zoids??? Whoaaaa I had an issue today. Short lived, or forever long, depending on how you look at it.

So not even an hour ago a co-worker of mine (which we've never exactly been close may I say) came strutting through our unit and was saying bye and that she was leaving. Whatever, not sure why all of a sudden that was necessary when she'd never done that before. Anyway, she stopped and looked at me up and down. I've gotta tell you all, I do look extremely thin today, based on my jet black skinny pants I'm wearing and my shirt is more fitting. I've usually taken to wearing baggier clothes to work, just didn't feel it today.

So she looks all embarrassed like and she says... OMG!! You're skinner than me now... OMG that's so terrible!!! She went on to say she weighs 180 Lbs so come to find out I even weigh less than her. Now if you know this about me, you know my weight no where matches my size. So you can imagine, she's put on the porker lately. We are roughly the same height.

I was a little dismayed because she's not one time told me this. Not once. I mean, not that I'm looking for it but when everyone else is doing it you just notice who's ignoring it, know what I mean? Here's the funny thing, I've known I'm smaller than her for awhile now. I've heard her mentioning her size and whatnot - so yeah, girlie I know I'm skinner than you... *sigh* Have been for awhile now.

She tried to clean it up by saying, well you look great - perfect. You don't need to lose anymore weight! Yeah there's that sentence again. Here's my theory about that sentence. I think there's always so much more behind that statement than the literal sense. To me, she said - don't lose anymore because you're (much) skinnier than me and I don't like it. I have a stinking suspicion someone is going to try to go on a diet soon... LMAO!!!

Anyway just thought I'd add an entry to the Skinny Girl Issues.

[CowgirlJane 14,261]

What makes me sad is that being obese is so emotionally painful, none of us that have weight issues need more pain! I don't understand why women don't treat each other better, tearing somebody else down doesn't put a person up higher.

[Lissa 2,631]

I have to admit that I sometimes think that people are too skinny to be having surgery. But, I'd never say that to anyone. I met a gal who weighed around 180 but needed to "lose 30 pounds" and she was talking about having VSG. I was surprised because it just seemed like an extreme solution to a fairly small problem. I know, pot and kettle.

Anyway, I had to remind myself not to say anything to her and let her work it out with her doctor. But, I was really thinking that she only weighs 10 pounds over my goal weight!!!

Oh, and as for clothes, I am the biggest gal I know, so no one is offering me clothes. I have one girlfriend who is close to my size and I keep offering her clothes with the caveat that she does NOT have to take them if they are too big for her. So far, she has taken all I've offered her, but before long I don't think any of mine will fit her. She's having thyroid issues and can't afford surgery so she's gaining a bit. I know she's trying really hard not to, though. She's getting married in March (and I'm officiating, YAY) so she wants to be able to wear the wedding dress she already chose.

Anyway, the others are right. Those who matter will say nice things to you for the most part. Those who don't say nice things need to not matter, IMO. I'd probably let it slide for the first comment or two, but I guarantee you I'd have a comeback after that...and it would probably be something along the lines of: :::haughty look:::: "Did you REALLY intend to say what you just said?" Or, as Miss Manners would do, give the person a shocked look and say "That's not any of your business!"

Good luck with the co-workers. Stories like that make me glad I am self-employed. There may be days I hate my co-workers, but I have to live with me, myself, and I, so I have to find a way to get along with all 3 of us!

[BlackBerryJuice 349]

No one's ever said anything like that to me, thankfully. Actually, I think there's a proper term for that - "concern trolling." People who are really bitter and jealous and try to express that in passive-aggressive ways.

The funniest thing I've heard lately about my weight was when I mentioned having eaten a whole bunch of Cookies at work....one of the older nurses said, "But you are such a skinny little thing, that sure doesn't show!" If only she knew!

[mina 27]

i work at a hospital and is very cordial to everyone.. now i'm getting comments from people i don't even know their names. people are telling me i'm going to blow away if i continue, i'm too skinny, i don't need to lose anymore weight, etc. it does get irritating after a while (if i asked your opinion on should i lose more weight then you can give me your opinion). I am loving my body and now am ready to seriously exercise to tone up and get leaner (i guess i will be hearing more comments ). i'm giving all the ones with a negative comment a mental middle finger, lol.

[Hetera 44]

I'm pre-surgery... 270, 5'9"; size 20. I think everyone has to remember that -probably every female - whether fat, skinny or in-between, is worried about their weight, and as sad as this is, when you're insecure, you always feel threatened in some way or another. I know because sometimes, when I'm feeling very VERY upset and vulnerable, it really makes me feel better to see someone heavier than me.... I'm always relieved NOT to be the fattest woman in the room.

The whole body-image thing has totally permeated society, and we're all victims of it. Some people are mean with it, others are more compassionate. I know this because I'm kind of both ways. Many of my friends are overweight, and I worry about what's going to happen to our relationships if/when I have surgery and lose 100 lbs... Will they be jealous, or awkward, uncomfortable with themselves? Will my losing weight make them feel bad about themselves? Will people who were able to lose weight though other means feel superior to me because I didn't have the self-discipline to lose weight on my own?

Will I feel superior to my overweight friends if/when I have the surgery? What will I do with my friends, socially, when so much of our time was spent involved in eating-endeavors?

I've been fat my whole life.... I have somehow defined myself as a "fat girl, woman." Who AM I if I'm not fat? If I'm not focused on food as my one source of pleasure-comfort?

I'm sorry people can be ugly about others' weightloss and have to try to make them feel bad, somehow. It's pretty nasty, but it's also a symptom of their own insecurities about their weight and their perceived "value."

[feedyoureye 3,087]

All good questions and observations.

I'm pre-surgery... 270, 5'9"; size 20. I think everyone has to remember that -probably every female - whether fat, skinny or in-between, is worried about their weight, and as sad as this is, when you're insecure, you always feel threatened in some way or another. I know because sometimes, when I'm feeling very VERY upset and vulnerable, it really makes me feel better to see someone heavier than me.... I'm always relieved NOT to be the fattest woman in the room.

The whole body-image thing has totally permeated society, and we're all victims of it. Some people are mean with it, others are more compassionate. I know this because I'm kind of both ways. Many of my friends are overweight, and I worry about what's going to happen to our relationships if/when I have surgery and lose 100 lbs... Will they be jealous, or awkward, uncomfortable with themselves? Will my losing weight make them feel bad about themselves? Will people who were able to lose weight though other means feel superior to me because I didn't have the self-discipline to lose weight on my own?

Will I feel superior to my overweight friends if/when I have the surgery? What will I do with my friends, socially, when so much of our time was spent involved in eating-endeavors?

I've been fat my whole life.... I have somehow defined myself as a "fat girl, woman." Who AM I if I'm not fat? If I'm not focused on food as my one source of pleasure-comfort?

I'm sorry people can be ugly about others' weightloss and have to try to make them feel bad, somehow. It's pretty nasty, but it's also a symptom of their own insecurities about their weight and their perceived "value."