So, I am of course hiding that I will be having my VSG in December (hopefully..fingers crossed). My mom knows, of course my husband and best friend know, other than that, no one else. I have brought it up to others and they just act shocked and appauled. What is the deal with being ashamed of this? I feel like people look at it like we are taking the "lazy way or easy way out". I am SO EXCITED to have this surgery and move on with my life. I want others to be excited too, but instead it is looked down on and ridiculed. Any others going thru this? How are you dealing, or are you in hiding with it too? All of a sudden I will be losing all this weight...will I have to BS and just owe it all to " diet excersise and lots of water!" ? Or do I say "yes, I had WLS and I am proud of it!" ?

Most people of average weight do not understand because they haven't walked in your shoes. You do not owe them any explanation for your weight loss. In order not to be rude and answering their question of how you lost so much weight, just tell them this.....with lots of hard work and dedication...........and you won't be a liar.

Everyone has different life experiences, and so they will come to different conclusions about what is best for them.

Very true!

I want everyone to know they don't have to be obese or childless for life. After surgery on Wednesday I will tell anyone who asks . I do the same with adoption. The occasional rude comments annoy me and hurt my feelings but I get over it.

It is the people who come over from DR, PR and other such places, apply for temporary medicaid, get the equipment and all health concerns taken care of and then go back to wherever they came from. THAT is the drain on the health care system!!!

This is offensive & hurtful. I doubt you have statistics to back this up but even if you did, this has no place in this forum. I was born in one of those " such places" and have been living in America for more than half my life. I am an American.......Actually I will stop now and spare you the history lesson. I come here for support and I now find myself angry & offended. I won't do the same to you. Hopefully we can stick to our common struggles and leave immigration , politics , religion and other topics somewhere else.

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you. But obviously you are not coming to America just to get health care and then leaving. I truly did not mean to offend you or anyone in anyway, and perhaps you are right about it not being the right place.

Apology accepted. It's all forgotten now.

I tell everyone. I don't care if I get the negative comments....I just think to myself nanananapoopoo I'm gonna be thinner than you whooo.....

Ha ha... I like this!

I finally told two of my closest friends and surprisingly they were really excited for me. One of them was jealous and said she wished it was her getting the surgery! She actually volunteered to go to the hospital and stay with me at the hotel (my surgery is out of town), so I don't have to do it alone!

As for the rest of the world.. not sure who I will tell. I plan to document my journey on youtube because the WLS community there is so awesome. I have a hard time not being truthful and even though it is nobody's business I tend to think I will probably be open about it afterward. I just want to be private about it before the surgery because I don't want any negativity.

As for being ashamed.... I am not ashamed of the surgery, but I do feel sad that it has come to this. I don't look at it as a cop out though. I definitely feel it is a strong decision to take the weight problem head on once and for all.

I have to admit, in the beginning I wasn't telling anyone and then I decided on a selective few. Now I'm just going to tell whoever asks and deal with the comments thrown my way. I think one of the biggest reasons I didn't want to tell and may be the case with others is the fact that I've let myself come to this. That I can't just diet, that I can't just excercise..they will actually be removing a very large part of my stomach,,literally cutting away what has been the biggest problem in my life,,the more I think about it, the more I accept what I've done to myself and will take this surgery on and let it be a haven for me instead of a burden. Anyone that wants to stomp on my parade can bite me.

I don't tell people at all. Thankfully the VSG allows me to lose weight at decent pace. I had my surgery in April and lost 70 lbs since then so my look doesn't seem drastic. When people ask me how I do it, I say I eat smaller portion sizes, exercise more and eat healthier. It's all the truth, I'm just omitting my stomach is smaller causing me to eat less. I can still eat all the bad food I use to and not do an ounce of exercise, and eat every two hours like I'm not suppose to, and I wouldn't lose as much. But I choose to do the right thing thanks to my sleeve.

Personally it's no one's business what I do to my body, and if other people judge you, then eff them. You have no idea what other people do during their free time so it's no business of theirs to know what you do. If you tell people about your WLS and they say something smart, just tell them you are a healthier you and no one can take that away from you at this moment.

I have no shame in getting this done. I want the whole world to know that i'm doing something for myself to make me healthier , happier, and a better mother to my children. I don't necessarily care if someone has a problem with it because after all, it is my body and my heath that's at risk. I've had nothing but good responses, everyone understands and is supportive for the most part. my fiance is a little worried about it and doesn't want me to have it done but oh well, i doing it anyways. I say BE PROUD! It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. this is for you, don't let negativity ruin it for you. own it and love it. if you are anything like me, this is the best decision you ever made for your health! you might even inspire someone else to look into it when all other options have failed. good luck with everything

Couldn't have said it better myself;-)

I myself have only told my mom. I'm in the beginning process now. I know what you mean with the people think it's the easy way out, I feel like my sister and others will see it that way too. So I'm reluctant to tell them. And it is hard because I know there's nothing EASY about it!! But explaining it to someone who's never had a weight issue or older family members, i feel like they just won't get it. It's an extremely personal thing we're doing for ourselves, and having only positive, supportive people around is essential. I'm still not sure if I'm gonna tell anyone else :/

I was supposed to do a liver shrink diet of 2 weeks that consist of protein shakes and unlimited starch free veggies. The problem is that I have cheated throughout the whole diet . Not to say that I cheated everyday, but every other day. Has anyone did this? My surgery is Thursday (11/17/11) and I haven't lost a single pound. Has anyone every did the same thing and still went through the surgery?

I personally have not had my surgery yet but I've heard some surgeons are really strict about it. They want you to shrink the liver so they can get to the stomach easier with less risk.

I was supposed to do a liver shrink diet of 2 weeks that consist of Protein shakes and unlimited starch free veggies. The problem is that I have cheated throughout the whole diet . Not to say that I cheated everyday, but every other day. Has anyone did this? My surgery is Thursday (11/17/11) and I haven't lost a single pound. Has anyone every did the same thing and still went through the surgery?

I -- and plenty of other people who've had the surgery -- didn't have a pre-op diet at all and did just fine, so I don't consider it dangerous per se. That said, if your surgeon requires it and you haven't followed it, they may be quite strict and not do the surgery. Good luck.

When I decided to start the program back in April, the only people that knew were my Husband and my Doctor. Then in May I had two of my cousins move in next door (sisters). I figured they were family and since they lived next door I could not hid it from them. So I told them...one was EXTREMELY supportive, she goes with the gym with me daily and between the 2 of us in the last 6 months we have lost together over 150 pounds!!! She helps keep me motivated, has gone with me to DR appts, Dietitian appts, Physically Therapy appts, we talk about menu changes and eating right etc. (Did I mention she weighed over 450 pounds when we started and without surgery, she is down to 360 pounds just by working out with me!) She is MY inspiration!

Now her sister.....the first thing she said when I told them about me getting a sleevie was "Thats cheating!!" That is when I closed down on telling people what I was going through. She has since seen her sister and I lose weight by working out and the closeness between us and decided she was going to get with the program too. She has lost 3 pounds (her weight started at 325 pounds). I am only 5 days out from surgery, and she told me yesterday, that while I was in the hospital, she called my surgeon and made an appt to get started on the Bariatric program herself!

Once I started losing weight pre-surgery and people started to ask me about it, I tentatively told a few (I wasn't ashamed of the surgery until my cousin made the comment about it cheating BTW), and all I have received is support from everyone I told (besides my cousin). I started to lose my embarrassment over talking about the surgery, the closer I got to my surgery and the more weight I lost pre-surgery. I discovered through Facebook, that by talking about my surgery that I have 4 people on my friends list (including my bestie from High School 30 years ago) that have had surgery in the last year, 8 more that have been thinking about it and 2 that will be having surgery in the next few months!

So by showing courage, and talking about it, you will find more support than you ever knew as well as changing people's minds about WLS being "cheating" once they find out how much work REALLY goes into it!

I have been averaging a pound a day weight loss since surgery BTW!

Before surgery, my husband, family, boss and a couple of close friends knew. After I got back to work and started losing, I told people when they asked abou my weight loss. I am not ashamed of it and don't try to hide it. But I am not trying to sell anyone on the idea of not hiding it. It is each of us's (bad grammar) own personal business.

Whatever you decide - good luck on the journey.