Age - 50ish

Weight to lose - at LEAST 75 pounds

*****************************************Last year I thought about doing this. ... and didn't. Didn't really have the money.

This year I wish I had followed through... and seriously looking at it again. I have a little more financial room than before.

I am nervous -- NOT about the surgery and certainly NOT about the lifestyle changes, but I am nervous about my social sphere. I want this for ME and I want it to be TOTALLY PRIVATE. The only person that I must tell is my spouse. So I am asking myself how much information do I need to give him? I do NOT want to just flat out lie to him... but he is going to be difficult. He loves me dearly and is very afraid of losing me - on a lot of levels for different reasons. I have just started planting the idea of WLS into him. At first he immediately jumped to all the negative results of people who have had WLS (one being his daughter (Run-Y) who gained all of her weight back within 1 year). I told him that we hear the same exact things from people concerning other "risk" events - motorcycle riding, flying, hiking, etc. So several weeks have gone by now and he is a little more settled with it.

NEXT he asked, "You are NOT going to do something crazy like go to Mexico to do this are you?!??!"

How do you answer that? "Uh yes honey, I'm going completely insane and going to save 50% on the surgery."

Right now all Texans are being asked to NOT cross the border in Texas into Mexico because of the vast number of disappearances happening to tourists. Not a problem... I think I want to go to San Diego and use Dr. Almanza at Mt. Zion.

So how much do I actually tell my husband?

He is a very talkative person and he tells everything he knows. He will tell his mother (she can be a little critical.. very critical). I don't want people to worry... seems like I am surrounded by a few of those types. He will tell. So I feel like I am almost stuck in a place of flat out lying to him, or knowing that I will have to deal with a lot of questions, etc. when I get home. EVENTUALLY I know it won't matter -- once the weight is off, I'll be singing it from the rooftops, but for now... I'm embarrased, and shy, and private!

I emailed the contact person about setting a date. It is all okay.... I have 3 extra days off work, coupled with a weekend - so a total of 5 days to get it done. My work is not strenuous so no problem there.

How do I disappear for 5 days?

How do I do that without notifying the people who I am in daily contact with. Again... I don't want to flat out lie to them... but I also don't want to deal with confrontation or negativeness or arguments or other peoples fear. NOR do I want to hurt or alienate the people who just love me so much they can't help giving me their opinions. lol.

VERY well said, Dr JSA!