Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Should I feel Guilty????



Recommended Posts

Hi there...

I had my surgery April 16, 2012 and have lost 52 pounds. I am extremely happy with my weight loss and hard work and do not regret getting the band but it can be difficult at times. I was one of the ones who did not tell anyone except my husband. So now that I have such a great weight loss and my parents and other family members can really see my weight loss why do I feel bad or guilty? I am one and a half years out but do not want to mess up my hard work! I honestly don't know how people will react....any advice???

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wouldnt feel guilty.It still took hard work and determination for you to lose this weight.So tell them or dont its up to you.Just know that you still had to work for what you have done. Be proud of yourself.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am going to throw an assumption out there and say you are probably just a very honest person and to hide things feels unnatural. I get the q all the time, how did you lose the weight? I say high Protein low carbs ahahaha. It's because I don't want any judgement, opinion or to have to give an educational lecture about the band. This is a very personal decision and journey and it does not require involvement or input of others thus others do not necessarily need to know.

The q's and comments are natural. It is astonishing to see someone drop 50 and 100+ lbs in front of your eyes. It's not something that you can hide. And yes, this accomplishment can make others jealous, standoffish even defensive. So those are the givens..but I say if you can drop 50 and 100 lbs you can definitely get over this LOL

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi there...

I had my surgery April 16' date=' 2012 and have lost 52 pounds. I am extremely happy with my weight loss and hard work and do not regret getting the band but it can be difficult at times. I was one of the ones who did not tell anyone except my husband. So now that I have such a great weight loss and my parents and other family members can really see my weight loss why do I feel bad or guilty? I am one and a half years out but do not want to mess up my hard work! I honestly don't know how people will react....any advice???[/quote']

A cousin just asked me how much I lost and how. I told her no one knows except my husband I never mentioned a doctor. I said I am on a strict diet and that's it. Many people don't know about my surgery and I like it that way. You do what is comfortable for you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

As I'm starting to lose weight and people are noticing, I just tell them I'm making some new lifestyle choices. No one at work knows I had a lap band put in. I'm not embarrassed about the lap band, I'm embarrassed that I let me weight take control for so long. Yep, I went out to lunch with a group this week and someone asked me why I just ordered a cup of Soup, and BAM, I just said I was making some new lifestyle choices and that was that.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You don't have to feel guilty, you have tool but you did the work, too! I never met goal when on WW or any other weightloss plan. But with lapband I did. I don't feel guilty, you should not either!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My mother used to say guilt is a disease, throw it out the window. I like that image. We are all entitled to our privacy. I don't like being discussed and worry about this as well as whether people will like me better when I'm thinner -- I feel like this is a funny thing to be anxious about, but there it is. I am thinking I could say that I'm eating extremely small meals. Truth with privacy intact.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×