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I Wish to Understand that Which I Do Not



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Dear LBT members, Since joining this site I have received invaluable information and many words of encouragement. I have been banded for all of five days now and I have made some crazy decisions (aka mistakes). To know me is to know that this is common. I have often believed that was put on this Earth as a source of Comedy Relief and a beacon of Joy in tough times. Im cool with that. I do believe laughter is the best medicine. If you can't laugh at life than you will most likely cry through it (or some other unhappy thing.). Anyways, I have also be sadden by some of the posts I have read. It hurts me when others are hurting emotionally and physically. For the later, I can only refer you to the doctor. I don't know how to cure a lot of physical ailments. But emotionally, yea who hasn't been there. So in the spirit of concern and wanting to help, I wish to understand something. Why are there a lot of people who are discouraged when they overeat, or their not losing weight fast enough, or they still feel fat after losing so much weight? Some close to me even admit to feeling bad when they overeat. As for me, I felt pain when I overate, when I ate, and when I didn't eat for years: physical pain. I guess the emotional never needed to take root. Im usually the "oops that was not the smartest move I just made" type of person. Have I had body image issues: Yes. But I know what I want fixed is not going to happen without surgery: Im top heavy and have been so since I was eight years old. I just make peace with the issue until I can do something to change it. Im most emotionally effected when I make mistakes that affect others. Even then I used to take the path of NOT wanting to eat. This does not make the situation better...by the way. Making peace and if possible fixing what I have done is what solves the problem. That and I have a very strong spiritual belief system. (This is not everyone's choice though so moving on.) What I want to say is this: Early on I learned through trials and self inspection, that you have to love yourself where you are NOW, not focus the thing you are trying to fix, but love YOURSELF IN THE NOW!. Reflect on what it is you really want in life. I want to be healthy, I want to have a family of my own, I want a job I enjoy. I love me even through the mess ups. I share my mistakes with others, we laugh, we cry, we watch movies, we shop, whatever....No being down on yourself. Do I have moments, yes I do. THAT'S WHEN I FIGHT FOR MY JOY! You are beautiful as you are now: All you are doing is improving your health so that you can shine a lot longer. Take control of your goals, don't let your goals control you. And laugh at the boo boos. Its alright. I promise. Good things are ahead. If all else fails, you can always ask me what "brilliant idea" did I carry out today. I have most likely done something comical. LOL.. no seriously, Love yourself and keep a good support system. You will go far.

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Well Hello Tiger, How do you feel? I'm going to be banded August 27th. I started out 292 (May2) My Dr. told me I had to lose 15 lbs. before surgery now I'm 270 and still working with it.

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Well said Ms. Comedian lol. I do believe a lot of people hurt because they were never really taught how to love. We are our own enemies but at the same time, many individuals have people in their lives that are very critical, self-righteous, demanding and all those negative things. Some of the posts I have read are quite hurtful. That's why I try to always encourage because I still need positive reinforcement from time to time.

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I'm loving your posts!! :)

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Girlfriend I hear you! Love what you say, and all I can say in reply is "if only we could band our head". One of the hardest parts of this journey is the mental part. our emotions and brain can really throw us for a loop.

Keep posting I love reading your stuff!!!!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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