I'm sitting here holding in the tears, the fears, and the upset. I'm sorry to dump this out here, but I need to let it go, and hopefully gain some wisdom from those of you who have been here.

The good part - I saw my primary today and presented him with a nice little worksheet I'd done showing my previously failed weight loss attempts, co-morbidity factors in addition to my 46 BMI, my questions, my concerns, my choice of the lap band and the surgeon to perform it. He looked it all over and said I made a good choice for a surgeon for me - that was nice to hear. It's good to know my primary respects him in the field.

Now, the bad part - He doesn't think the band is worth it for me. He admits that he's not overly experienced with band patients, but he does have RNY bariatric patients. He said he's read a lot of literature on the band (so have I!!!) but just doesn't think it's going to be what I need because portion control isn't my problem. He wants me to go with the RNY because he's seen it work fast in his other patients. I feel like I just got kicked in the face - even if it was done politely.

I've put so much time into researching, reading, and educating myself about the band. I have spent probably 25 hours in the last week reading and learning all I could find. I felt like this would be the right choice for me for all the following reasons:

1. I don't really want my guts re-routed (God made them this way for a reason)

2. There's so much less risk, and with 2 kids I can't afford to have major problems - especially not death

3. It's reversible *if* there was a problem

4. Easier recovery and less hospital time

5. The band wouldn't require me to be on special Vitamins, etc. for the rest of my life (what happens if I lose insurance?!? then what?!?)

6. So many people have found success with the band it gives me hope

Are we seeing a pattern here? I really don't want the RNY, for so many reasons. And yet, this is what my primary wants for me. I'm scared, I'm confused, and I'm heartbroken. I did get the referral to the surgeon and I will of course discuss all this with him, but - pardon my trucker mouth - but WHAT THE F*$#?!?

Have any of you gone through this? Any sage words of wisdom? Thoughts? I'm sorry to have dumped all this, I just really need some support through this tough night.

Thanks for listening

El

oooops, hold on

I too think that Docs prefer the RNY over the band for a few reasons:

1. They know more about it (it's been around longer)

2. It is more of a forced success. You can't cheat it as you can the band. You are rewired and therefore forced to lose weight. With the band you can "eat around it" which is obviously a concern for people with food issues.

This having been said I think Docs need to look at the pluses of the band (which you listed) as well as the fact that the band can be tweaked over time (via fills) so that you can lose weight, and if you falter, the band can help you try again. With RNY if you regain weight it is up to you and will power alone to bring it back down.

Stick to your guns.... Go see the specialist/surgeon. As long as your PCP gives you the referral, it doesn't matter what you & the bariatric doc decide---right?

I had a long talk with my husband this morning when he got home from work and fully discussed everything that happened yesterday. He is dead set against the bypass also and fully supports the band if that's what I want to do - and as you know, it is!

I decided this morning that I'm going to start following the band diet NOW, rather than wait. If nothing else I will have myself prepared for when the time comes. I know I'll need to learn small & slow bites - might as well practice until I get it right! Going to start measuring portions, protien first, veggies/fruit second, and whole grains last. Water and Diet Lipton Green Tea with Citrus as my only beverages. I think this will help me in the long run as I'll already be used to eating this way once I can come off the mushies, plus, maybe I'll lose a few bonus pounds during my wait for surgery. How long I'll have to wait.. well.. I have no idea yet. Hopefully it will be done by the end of summer (is this a realistic time frame?).

You all have been so wonderful and supportive.. many many thanks for that. I'm so glad to have found this forum. I wish each and every one of you continued success with your bands.

hugs,

El

I decided this morning that I'm going to start following the band diet NOW, rather than wait. If nothing else I will have myself prepared for when the time comes.

E - I have been following the band diet for about a month. Well, sort of. I am not consciously restricting the quantity, or even protein first, carb second, but am doing the "chew.... chew... chew" routine, and no liquid during the meal. The result is that I am not eating as much. I get full faster, and have lost 10 lbs without even trying. I actually left some hamburger and fries at Red Robin the other night.:clap2:

I have also been sampling the protein drinks, soups, etc., because I want to know now what I like and what I don't. So, I think in general, eating the bandster way is a good thing. JMHO

El,

Good for you!

Be determined. Do what YOU think is best for YOU. It sounds like you're knowledgeable enough to know what procedure is best for you and are going for it. Everyone has to come to that point for themselves and thank goodness you have (and aren't being swayed by poorly informed medical practicioners).

My doctor's nurse told me that up to 80% of all medical practicioners (that includes doctors and nurses) do not even know what the band is or how it works. Just because you're PCP has experience with patients who have had RNY doesn't mean he's an expert. You could be the case that he uses in the future to say "Hey, I have had highly successful patients who have had lap band." Do what you feel YOU can live with. I've resigned myself to having to teach my other medical providers about the lap band because they all assume I've had bypass.

Be strong.

I seriously do not think your primary care physician is recommending bypass surgery because of money. What I do believe, though, is that this procedure is one that requires a lot from the person. It is not as successful as bypass surgery because of that. I mean, if we all had what it takes to be thin, we would be thin! Lap band statistics, so far, are not that great, and I can see why...it takes the same type of work as not being banded did! If you don't change your ways, you're not going to lose weight with the band.

With that being said, though, I believe it is the healthiest choice and least invasive. I guess it all depends on how much YOU want to make behavioral changes on your own.

Kelli

When I told my doctor I wanted the lap band, she didn't know what I was talking about. She wasn't very encouraging, but when she read the surgeons qualifications and read over the brochure she was better, not great, but better. My point is Doctors don't know everything, and there human beings with opinions. I had already decided I was getting the surgery, with or without her blessing. She gave me her blessing...barely. I'm sure she'll be handing out more of my surgeons brochures this year when she sees how great I'm doing. Do what YOU think is best! Take Care:)

If I needed my PCP "permission" and he didn't give it to me, I'd get myself another PCP before you can say "you're not a god, pal". The only permission you need is from yourself! Is there something I am missing here??

If your particular insurance plan insists on your PCP recommending you then call surgeons office-get a list of PCP names that they have worked with-then call your insurance co with the list-see who is under your plan-call the doc to get appt-if they give you a song & dance about waiting more than a few weeks-politely ask if you can keep calling just in case of a cancellation.

You don't have to rationalize that you eat a certain way or you crave a certain food. You made a choice based on information, facts and knowing your body. It is your body.

My sister just had her banding done on 5/3...when she first mentioned it to her PCP he didn't know anything about it. We printed out a bunch of statistics and info from online sources and she gave it to him. He wrote the letter for her insurance co. but hasn't said anything about the stuff she

gave him. I think we oftentimes haveto educate them...

Emily